If we lived according to TV/movie standards, everyone would 
move to New York or L.A. after graduation and live in apart-
ments far exceeding our income. Here are a few more unique 

(and more realistic) post-grad options.

2B

Magazine Editor:

Ian DIllingham

Deputy Editor:

Natalie Gadbois

Design Editor:

Jake Wellins

Photo Editor:

Luna Anna Archey

Illustrator:

Megan Mulholland

Maggie Miller

Managing Editor:

Lev Facher

Editor in Chief:

 Jennifer Calfas

Copy Editors:

Hannah Bates

Laura Schinagle

Emma Sutherland

THE statement

THE LIST

BALTIMORE, MD
In recent years young people have been flocking to this bay 
city because of its proximity to D.C. and its affordability.

CLEVELAND, OH
No longer the “mistake on the lake,” the Land of Cleves 
boasts a happening food scene and growing start-up 
industry.

DENVER, CO
Best for those who love the outdoors and appreciate a good 
bar, Denver is the definition of chill.

BUZZFEED, BUT BETTER

POST-GRAD DESTINATIONS

AUSTIN, TX
Often billed as a larger, more diverse, warmer Ann Arbor, 
Austin combines Texas eccentricities with the cultural 
offerings of a much larger city. 

PORTLAND, OR
Known mainly as a hipster paradise because of the show 
“Portlandia,” this small city is calm and beautiful.

1 

3 

5 

Wednesday, March 18, 2015 // The Statement

L

ast St. Patrick’s Day, I 
remember 
leaving 
the 

house with one of my room-

mates on a people-watching expe-
dition. Before either of us partook 
in any of the celebrations, we 
wanted to take the time to take 
full witness of the carnage that 
was ensuing just south of campus.

If you’ve ever been in Ann 

Arbor on a football Saturday, you 
can probably picture the scene: 
kegs, mud, orange construction 
fences, mud, bro tanks, funnels, 
mud, and music. The difference 
was the substitution of green for 
the customary maize and blue.

As 
we 
walked 
passed 
an 

unnamed fraternity house on 
our way home for the afternoon, 
I noticed a group of middle-aged 
men and women standing on the 
sidewalk observing the destruc-
tion. They were all Ann Arbor 
residents and, despite the occa-
sional shamrock pin, they were 
not there to celebrate. They were 
there to protect the students.

As partygoers exited the fra-

ternity’s backyard, I watched as 
these adults stopped particu-
larly intoxicated boys and girls 
to check their condition, asked if 
they needed transportation, and 
— in the most severe cases — con-
tacted the proper authorities to 
get students the help they needed.

I 
remember 
immediately 

feeling embarrassed as a group 
of partygoers, obviously more 
concerned 
about 
preserving 

the health of the party than the 
health of their peers, gathered 
on the porch and heckled these 
Good Samaritans as they relayed 
information to paramedics and 
police.

Though visibly disturbed, the 

vigilant group of Ann Arborites 
did not waver from their spot. 
They held their ground as two 
paramedics and a police officer 
entered the yard to retrieve a 
young girl who appeared uncon-
scious. Only as the party began 
to dwindle down — presumably a 
shortage of green beer — did they 
move down the block to the next 
party.

I don’t know any of the people 

that were in that group of citizens. 
They don’t know me. But, that 

day, they were out there to make 
sure our student body was safe. 
At worst, they shut down a couple 
parties. At best, they may have 
protected someone from serious 
injury or death.

This 
school 
is 
a 
world-

renowned institution and natu-
rally elicits a sense of prestige 
— and a fair share of perks — to 
those fortunate enough to have 
the chance to enroll. But, like 
other universities across the coun-
try, it places students in an envi-
ronment that breeds a sense of 
entitlement while simultaneously 
clouding students’ perceptions of 
the “real world” outside this two-
mile bubble.

That entitlement includes a 

belief that someone else will step 
in to protect us when we do stupid 
things. While this becomes the 
case in practice, it should not be 

the expectation. The old motto, 
“college is the place for making 
mistakes,” is not a free pass to 
make your safety — potentially 
your life — someone else’s respon-
sibility.

I didn’t end up drinking last St. 

Patrick’s Day. Witnessing so many 
“close calls” killed my desire to 
celebrate Christianity coming to 
Ireland and PBR coming to Hill 
Street. This year, I’ll likely cel-
ebrate with a non-green beer as I 
edit installments for next week’s 
magazine.

But if the group of unappre-

ciated guardians decides to do 
their holiday service once more, I 
hope they are at least treated with 
respect — maybe even offered a 
passing “thank you” for keeping 
watch over crazy crowds of kids 
decked in green.

Footnotes: Green beer and entitlement

B Y I A N D I L L I N G H A M

ILLUSTRATIONS BY MEGAN MULHOLLAND

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4 

COVER BY LUNA ANNA ARCHEY