Saturday, February 12, 1938 T HE M IC H IG AN D A ILY Page Thirteen Saturday, February 1 2, 1 938 THE MICHIGAN DAILY Paae Thirteen Undr TUhe CWith Lord Beaconsfield Under TheClockW(Benjamin Disraeli) A Sad Story Of Johnny G. And The Ho IT WAS A SAD STORY that came tC us-even unto the very day of th J-Hop indeed. For it is the tale oa the youngest member of the Boys ir the Back Room, our gentle friend Johnny Greenbehindtheears. For weeks the Boys had looked for- ward to the night when they coulc send Johnny forth, bedecked in th He Hopped Over JOHNNY GREENBEHINDTHEEARS Old Southern Gentleman's swallow tails, Peter the Deepthroated Belch's tux pants, George the Potbellied Bar- tender's checkered vest and Payne Whitney studs. Johnny was late last night and the Boys while away the time counting out the extra buttons and the mildewed dollar bills they had collected between them. That afternoon they had said to him., "Johnny, you're ready. You're in the pink. We got you into the finest condition you could get into." And Peter had clinked those heavy coins in his pocket meaningly. Johnny was eager enough but he seemed mystified. The Old South- ern Gent mentioned it when Johnny had left that afternoon after he had been told to come back again at seven. "Suh, it is all a great mystery to him, a great glorious adventuah tah him." And he wiped a tear away as he politely thumped his cane against the gabboon. The other boys made plans, laying out the swallow tail and rubbing the marks off the stag celluloid collar with an art-gum eraser. Seven came and Johnny was late. The Boys jingled their pockets im- patiently and flicked the lint off the tux pants. Finally Johnny's step was heard and they leapt to their feet. The door flew open and there he was, their own little Johnny. And there were Johnny's BVDs and there was Johnny in them. Across his chest -hiding those gentle fronds of light blonde hair-he had a number torn fram a calendar. And his knees were clattering together like a bundle af heads in a cramdsession. "Johnny!" said Peter the D.T.B. "Johnny!" said George the Pot.B.T. "Johnny, sub," said the O.S.G. "There was no need of you to come like that. You could have changed over here," said Peter for it now was his turn to be mystified. He motioned to the clothes on the bed. Johnny looked at the swallow tails. "You mean I gotta wear those things? Why I'll never be able to hop any- the dancing couples with a dreamy where!" eye. A haze descended on them all. "Suh, Ah happed in them ...and All but Johnny, who slipped away. fash many a yeah ah happed in them, suh!" the Old Southern Gentleman A little while afterwards he returned said politely but firmly. happy and buoyant. They looked at "But I'll trip over them, honest him wistfully. I will." "Boys, I just me tthe swellest girl. "You'll trip over them!" George She's from way out of town . . . not the Potbellied Bartender said. "Look, just a town girl. She's from a place boys, he doesn't know what he's talk- called Dexter-I'll bet ybu never ing about! He's crazy! Are you crazy, heard of it-and I'm going to take Johnny? Come on now, tell us. You her to this here J-Hop next year. I'm ain't gone crazy have you, kid? Look, glad you told me about it." bay, s gata feverA At first there was coldness like a ning araund naked." And Gearge the sorrowing winter wind, but in a mo- Potbellied Bartender blushed. ment Peter the Deepthroated Belch "Laak," pleaded Peter the Deep- looked eager, and then the Old South- throated Belch, "Tonight is the J-Hop ern Gentleman smiled politely, and and there you stand in your BVDs. George the Potbellied Bartender It's uncivilized!" he shouted with a beamed. They leaned forward and deepthroated eructation. hope climbed wearily into their hurt, "But I'll only trip over them," worn faces, Johnny insisted. s "Oh, my gawd, he'll trip over them," Sa, little children,ya 4see that Peter moaned, all his dreams caming (continlued en Page 14) down upon his head and turning to dandruff. "Boys, he'll trip over them!" And he dropped brokenly into a chair. George patted Peter on the shoulder consolingly and looked menacingly at Johnny. "What will the chaperons think? What will your date think?" "What do you mean, chaperons ... and date?" Johnny asked terrified. "Date ... I thought this was an indi- vidual event and not for teams. What's a date got to do with the J-Hap? Have I gatta belang ta the ,s ~ WAA?" And Johnny snorted satirical- a ly and wagged his head over his witticism. "Teams, Johnny ... an individual event and what was that crack about the WAA?" Peter said weakly. i- New Beauty Salon. ." ULTRA MODERN CH ROME Equipment - Featuring Personal Service in All Lines of Beauty Culture. Bluebird Beauty Shoppe 5 Nickels Arcade Phone 9616 "The J-Hop is a dance, Johnny. It is the biggest social gesture of the year. They have two orchestras and you get tight," George defined piously. "And you have a fight with your girl," Peter added in a voice heavy with awe. "Boys! Do you mean that for a month now I have been giving you my board money and my beer money and you have been watching my diet and you have been tightening my belt ..." "So you could have the cash to go to the J-Hop," chimed all the Boys tagether. "And I thought all the time you were getting me in shape for an ath- letic event. I was going to win my M." Johnny looked as if he might break down, but anger blasted his youthful countenance. "And I suppose that fortnight of running up and down the Diagonal chasing that guy who always carried those little en- velopes around under his arm and always just flicked them under my nose, going from the Union to the League and to the Library and to Ecorse and to the Engine Arch . . . that guy was the guy selling the tickets." "Yes," they all said unhappily. "I thought all the time I was doing roadwork and he was like in hare- and-hounds," Johnny said brokenly. "I practiced hopping at night too. I could hop from here to the I-M." The sigh from the Boys in the Back Room ballooned his BVD shorts behind him and he recalled his n-dness. They saw him shiver, so George the P.B.T. threw him an old pair of overalls and he got into them, also donning the fulldress shirt they had laid out for him. When he had dressed, the Boys rose with Johnny in their midst and walked in mournful silence to the door of the Armory. George the Potbellied Bartender offered the man there a little white envelope. "That won't get you in here. That's for the J-Hop." The Boys in the Back Room winced and Peter handed the man some money. Upstairs they went and to- gether they sat in a corner watching '5as hion 7#onors to Jacobson )s Makers of University of Michigan Jewelry * LOCKETS BRACELETS RINGS COMPACTS CIGARETTE CASES ARCADE JEWELRY SHOP FOR YEAR-ROUND FASHION STYLES, whether it be swanky evening formals or chic afternoon tea dresses, the honors must go to JACOBSON'S, Ann Arbor's fashion center for women's clothes. Choose your next evening gown for the coming dances from a complete selection of smartly styled Spring polka dot taffetas . . . black nets with white organdie boleros... printed crepes ... pastel chiffons .. marquisettes with lace boleros . . . printed satins . .. and many others.