THE MICHIGAN DAILY THURSDAY, Uc LYPURCHASENEW JNION FOR OWN PRIVATE GARAGE NG ! ALOYSIUS F. MAN DIETERSOLL NEW YORK HOUSE- OF DISCREDIT USE OF TRACK UP TO UNIVERSITY HALL Brother Hopes Fraternity Will Not Pledge Before Man Leaves Train My Dear Brother: In view of my very kindly and per- sonal interest in the fraternity's pro- gress and well-fare, I am taking this opportunity to contribute to the ulti- mate perpetuation of a greater chap- ter, by proposing for membership a youth whose spiritual and moral be- ing' signalizes to me the incorpora- tion of such virtues and inherent ten- dencies as might conspire to assist in effecting a harmonious and pleasing realization of this ,coveted end., o tspeakwithout direction or cir- cumlocution, I wish specifically to recommen~d young Aloysius Ferdinand Houseman-Dietersoll of New York City, (N. .). Young Aloysius comes from one of the finest families in America and his social standing is such as to place it above the planetof discussion. In fact, I believe the Houseman-Dietersolls have evidence of their direct descendency from Christopher Columbus and Queen Isa- bella.Dunn and Bradstreeterate his father, Franlistes George Houseman- Dietersoll as fourth in their list of "The World's Richest Mqu." In fact, it has been rumored in Wallstreet financial circles, that the Houseman- Dietersoll estate has volunteered to subscribe the entsire three billion dol- lars which will constitute the second liberty loan. Young Aloysius's fath- er is president of the 12 largest banks in New York, 6 in Philadelphia, 17 in San Francisco and one in Ypsilanti. Is Quie Young Aloysius is a modest, quiet, unassuming chap, and makes an in- 'stant hit wherever he goes. He is a handsome fellow and last week was officially awarded the Hitthers-John- son trophy which annually goes to the best dressed man on Long Island. He was the All-American prep school end and in addition is a baseball play- er of great repute. He has had offers from the Tigers, Giants, White Sox, Reds, Cardinals and the Bridgeport ndependents. He was the most prominent track star in his school and is credited with running the 100- yard dash in 9 2-5 on three occasions. The A. A. U. is investigating, and doubtlessly a new world's record will be announced shortly. Recently he ran an exhibition mile down Broad- ,way pursued by three policemen and two head waiters and his time was 4:12 3-5, just 1-5 of a second slower than the world's record which is held by Norman Taber. With training and college development he should im- prove this mark considerably and I Aare say he will be running close to four minutes before the noon of Feb- ruary 30 his senior year. Close Contract I understand that his father has re- gently closed a contract with the di- rectors of the' New Michigan union, whereby it will be converted into a garage for young Aloysius's cars, the upstairs being devoted to sleeping quarters for his servants. Young, Aloysius was the high hon- or student in his class, and he grad- uated from prep schoolwith an av- erage of 100.04 for his four years work. He plays the violin in re- markable style and twice when Maude Powell has been unable to appear at the Metropolitan Opera House, Aloy- sius has substituted in her place. trBy the way, Lee, get some new ash trays. Young Aloysius smokes mon- pgramed King Sized Pall Malls and he ismaccustomed todusing radium ash receivers, but I explained to him that owing to Michigan's heralded democ- racy, we only used gold ones in Ann Arbor. Young Aloysius will play on the All-Fresh football, basketball, track and baseball teams. He will not de- vote any of his time to student pub- lications, as he is preparing a treat- ise on the fourth dimension, a thesis on the true and exact nature of elec- tricity and a scholarly disquisition on psychasthenia and its relation to the Teutonic individual. His literary ef- forts will be devoted exclusively to the furtherance of these masterly ef- forts. Leaves on Special Young Aloysius leaves New York on a special train Monday with his father. His father will continue on througlV to Chicago where he is going to buy the Art Institute in the hopes that he can find some suitable paint- ings therein to decorate his son's col- lege suite. Please plan to meet the boy at the Michigan Central Depot. His father insisted upon having a sid- ing erected so that he could run his train directly to U. Hall but I was firm and convinced him that this would run counter -&o Michigan's dem- ocratic atmosphere. I would not of- fer young Aloysius a, button until af- ter he had stepped off the train. It might look as though' we were rush- ing matters if he were bid while still leaving the car seat. Sruch impetuous haste is unseemly and uttbecomes the noble dignity of such 9n order as ours. Young Aloysius is 18 6-14 years old. He weighs approximately '(63.8 and breathes with both lungs. jIe uses two legs in walking and spiiM be- tween his teeth.' He will come to :Michigan strongly recommended t' several other organizations. Do not offend the boy in any way as he is quick tempered. Recently in a pri- vate, bout in his own gold studded gymnasium, he knocked Jess Willard cold in 47 seconds. (They fought with bare fists and Willard was uncon- scious two days.) ._ _ i Prohibition Stuff Young Aloysius does not drink ex- cept when he breaks training. (This Is Christmas day and the Sunday be- tween the closing of football season and the opening of basketball.) He is predisposed to Gordon Gin and drinks it in beer glasses (bottoms up) and uses whiskey chasers. I hope you land the kid. He's a win- ner. Wire me if you need any help. RE ODELED He is dated up for four house part already. Norma Talmadge is com: to the J. Hop, Anita Stewart to June party, and Emma Goldman going to the union with him so Saturday night. He will allow dan there Saturdays as in the past, g ing up the Sunbeam section of garage to this purpose. Patronize Our Advertisers.-Adv U U SWAIN Develop Films and Plates, make Prints and Enlargements of all sizes; make Lantern Slides. Take Pictures to order, indoors or out, any size, anywhere, any time Have for sale the most Artistic Views ever made in and around Ann Arbor. WE TRY TO SERVE YOU RIGHT You will find our Lunches, Candies, and Sodas more delicious than ever : : : : : " " "0 We are still featuring Bloomfield's Chocolates in the Yellow and Blue Boxes, known wherever Michigan men may be 713 Give the same careful expert attention to your work as to East U. my own. P. S. I have the Daises & Nickels Negatives. Come in and see our newer more beautiful store and THE NICKELS ARCADE CAFETERIA in the NICKELS ARCADE I 3loom feidl OPENS THIS WEE i JKaL " WHERE CLEANLINESS IS PARAMOUNT I 709 North University ANN ARBOR DETROIT For Fifty Years Distributors of University ext ooks and Supplies I. P. LEATHER NOTE BOOKS I. P. LEATHER NOTE BOOKS Agents for Irving Pitt Leather Note Books Fully Guaranteed by Maker and Seller All Sizes Name Embossed Free of Charge (The Oldest College Store at Michigan)