COOL-
U. of Colorado, Boulder
A team of physicists as CU
recently stucceesled in creasing an
etttirely new farm of matter at thec
lotwest semspertureever recotrded
its the universe. Kttown as thc
Botse-E intseisn cosndesisate, the mat-
tee was predcttetl hy Albert Litt-
steittatad istttnly pttssible at temt-
peratutres tnearittg absolctte zero-
a theoretical temoperature at which
a sttbstatnce has ntt heat atnclno
ttattittn. Thc ptoint of all tltis beisng
svltat did you do fttr yottr slim-
met vacatiosn?
ALL THE N"1EWl'S
THAT FITS
U. of New Mexico
Attd yso thousgh t nth ing cxcit-
tag eseihappcescd at vtttr schtool.
T1he followitng stttry tppeareci-
we sweat io the ftsststpage tof
the U. osf New Mexicos's LDtly
Itsbts."Euigesse Sasnchsez epcrsuted tos
pltiictihat an uttkntownsusstsance
collected ott his casr wihile it rse
itt a parking s trttctttre, ptolice
reposrts state. I nmiiedi a liisht
brotwtndirt ttrcdust-like sustsatnce
ot said vehsicic,' officer R.kJUilsw
repttrtecd. I believed tisis suibstasnce
to he ducst that stttck tot water
sdrops, bhets dried.' Uglosw
infttrmSot anchseeztarttis was ntt
crimiinal siansage. I The sttbsttnce
canse soff easy,' thesofficer rcposrt-
edI"iTatnk goosdtness fsr a free
tress, tsr we toay have sever
earnoed(if tisostr sage.

ll S itJOS ByssoWILLsOs ssss, 5U. soCI-Ississ sa, DsVIs

POWER e pi
U. of Hawaii
Btssitess stu-
dcnts atr thc U. of
Hawis recccttiv)0 )
tgc tuttont
tincreases at thcir
catttous. Seniosr ,
acscoutintsg maor
Tyv Kanaanssoh I
tie bussitss
scitool bclieve
ttey'cc nttgettitng ts' test psossleicedusca tissss bocause theis ersitcys
lackss cttrrctnt techsnolosgy.Altisousglhttorcettsn301 tstcictsspickcted
its frotsso f tise statehousssc' tossitice thicr consscrnsslegislasstoslcdeto
reply. "Wdle fedeloas tiyssts iay morc syos getsmore,"Kanaanehtsais.o
Wh5/atevrcosayspace mns.

death, toscsvs ers osf tise Jasses fasssilv
allioved sloe body so be exhumdtotss
irovsectisey are te actusal rclatives itf
thc fsssssssussoa. Finnseg~asscd
Isis teams-ss oshoulssd wsocall tiemt
ste Finnetgans Gansg? - hope sso
rlSsse uip sle truthisloy sid-ci Feosasv
at, too, ssssdsssvs.
CUTTNG
THROUG3H THE
BUL
U. of Georgia
He gossit soshertt. cssor
gsia polsicesiquestionssthsestssr givens
sessistr,regardsinsg ashoossstinsg ilar
iciesnce issll. iiJohnssso ossoisce thsas
hewssoithie butt5cks biy tos
rrsisiscrinisron's dmrom~5ssstsisli.
removesthe sallcalibierbllist. A
stlie searcis of tesooisc vee
maosijssaan reasmsossi unsy'ssss st 
Cassh. lRisht lmssssvs smes elo
qetosatothesesiaisisty 5sfthr
St, sas Chuck l lsorssss,sssss coos

nosw." Tfhere are no suspects Intshie
bsrief Mclisappsearassce, bit she little
Wesody's chick was reposrtedly found
grimnacisog sear she crime scene.
THE CHE"APER
PAPER CAPER
U. of New Mexico
Tsssoi bathsromsaits tsshreat-
esnesd aUNM cusodoianith ssoa
ksnsfcesvhesshe swalked ison00tbess
attcempssted ess. The targcetof thc
theft sitesdsslir's worosssfs
pperct sossels. (CusstoiiianssDasvid
Masrsquiezsays ie salkes inisissa
menctIs testtossst isthcsmantagemsent
schools isnsisiw n' osf ithsoesse
sststig pper towselsistom.u cis
locisser it a backpack. ,Varcgisez
sass sloe seconsuitnsths en thsreat-
esned buss with a 4- s t osisss kife
ansousssted, "Ysousaren' t g011isto~ss
ssit s!" hcsesien sshen sicdes
cleant getawayso situlefttsecusstiosdi-
ansssunisarsssed. itslisceltesears~schedi
thes area tssssssassil.Giss stscy'is
U. of Utah
arst iste brakcs ott seiers,
bsst so oss btsiabsly tonttsece.any
high-speedchses. The lismit is 10i
mp,ssandis's tor cyclists, slits-
boresadi-lsn'skaters. sitsg
isdr o sctc ste ssffessdess, police
haecoscedcyclists ,goit stisis
dsown stepscasusss sh ills. Nots,ho
lonsg 1b1efreskstes adsike iisssomse

U. of Utah
Ansothser wssthiy frsnt-p jagestsory
friomsth ose wa~cksssst Wtest: "
cindsimentt csuntsis'sxlodedc,

~4w1Yy row vqb qcK 1 1 1ctxl
iedl iS Pe~~~tIP

thsrowinig naspkis
ite Isireigis
Eschsasge ini
ass Tohursdiay,"
repsorts te iSsms
U. of Utahsl's tis-
A UnonerraI
isana t ge r
syig, Ilie
bildsinsig is old.
Tiksikeg hssthis
happsiens."No site
wsas injurec initshle
blisast essosismss
psolice reiportseoct-
erl comttint ss
fromi s rl-
tied hitt dog.
Michigan
State U. -
MSU stus-
dents get to rol
int he green tsusff
befosresissy ee
graduate. Ito
homoage so sass-
bail, football asid

socrfields ever'vsere, MSU has
its sownsscihool oit tissrassmaaige-
meitsiichices classes int
crop ansd silssciesices. Te cho
heclpciisdcselop sash'brid grssssseed
sssi sdringthests199i4 Wrldnit p
'SoccerTrnIamenstiisis. Whoisiiknew
tit ithesiriss is uslitsysreerc oil
tsessothericsite If she Mici ait
U. of Arizona
Ptsours' lituse awhere I cast see
it!A ftrmrio U 1. sitArizonat stsudent
blew a ,icircuit andiiirdflive t5sits
int toiunversity omputoisiesrIsisin
wt pol ssiss ic recallingy asirasndom
acst o ittoilence. T'eloeislice seport
say s JotisMead, woviosttsendcesthsie
schols i inte'its,swas ositshifot
isig tforte cioputers. Measd con-
tessesd suit be was airnsinsg tforsets
ple ite iilout thit, beccause h
wsas a bad shtl, hoe diamsagedonlb
tedciopliters. Ftisas sects
charsgedsitihshires countis ofiaggra-
vateid assault last otiscolitsot
feloniy endsansgermsents. Kige .sgaists
Kansas State U.
Whosi is buiiied its Jesse lasses'
tomsb? loss'swaa ateamsiof scien-
sists and researchers as Kasas State
hU. iss tognst figure isis. Ansthro-
pooypsiofessior Michoael Finniegans
Issbrouights ibeskeletal reomaiss
believed st be lasses' back so te
KShU camutosionssduucttests,
Because te trse story of Jesse's
sheath is sinknsowvi ansi these were
too autopsy records as she tinse of

typlcoetie:Buutt offic..
North Carolina
State U.
Mcioalsd has
beet sasuel'
rtrehefbesgi isOstatuse of .
thoc burger-batik- aY
sn ownuovswoas
fonesod us theeo
fromusa fMcDon
alists tesscamustis.
KRoaldowsseft EN NV
hangiguton'sitsee Harvard U.
stein NC Stats's issisatasucsumibser it yoursnpocketf Authoru
D..HillLbrboany ihubsiaty woas excitedi so see aulusgsesturosu
swith a loose at Isis 'oske Buck rise bPenis nails its (aunioid'e,
attachsed climoiung "Mass. ZLss h~shatdediest csuucussbiestrut ici-
shout she Hanui- iants and passersby so celebnate sloe aforeomen-
gluarisissuiot tionecd ongasn of te soale anutomy. "I'Is sOK to
responssihbs. for the be a stat,' /obaty says. W5litho other moesmhers
kidntappinog. "It uof Menton, a ntaisoal men's organizations that
said hoe usst wenst ads'ocatsessnasculissity, Zubaty gathoeredt inoFian-
oust on his oswo vard Sqsiare so ptiitest anti-male propaganda.
attdovasnted so get Althsousghs /ubaty says she tally stanted oust as a
a Whoopper,' says spoouf, its snto coincideoce shut hoe was sintulta-
harsyI ibis, psublic steously promsotiog his stew book out shat hoe
safety spokesper- says ate she frauds of femnismo.Kiumsoor has it
suui. 'He sus- tat a femoale dnivehy yelled, "Lortena Bosbbitt
tained 550itijuries. fusssurgeons gesneral!"
He's doisng fuse

FH I
U. of Michigan
Mike Pixley is douinig isore fist huutmankintd
friom the comtos of Isis La-Z-Boy thansosts
stun dii stanidisng up. Webb, tmafybesuit. Pixley,
ass aerosopace etigisseernsgmoajior it rise U. sif
Michigan, tested La-Z.-Boy chairs fist eight
housa o say thsis sstmmser. Mike's jobh, iccordnsg
tuo a spsokespserson for the iosmspussy, was tout
the chisstrosugho asstucssighous use us puss-
sibsle ini itseight-housir period." IPixley replacedsa
dummyosstfe55r whsest cumspoliy officials sdes-
stouned that i's easiesrio get a hiumnto sit hick,
ruick oustreclisse. Kiosk ono, diudef

6 U. Matgezie "October 1995