Page Eight THE MICHIGAN DAILY
ADVICE TO STAY-AT-HOME:
Fight 'Traveleritus' a t
With Globemanship
(EDITOR'S NOTE: Although this
supplement is primarily aimed at head wagging in good-humored
(he prospective traveler abroad, un- amazement.
doubtedly some readers won't get
tie oppornity or don't feel the HIS THEN is point two, atti-
ncinaton to leave the vicinity o tude So a: however, our dis-
Ann Arbor this summer. The follow- rd.S ahwvr u i
in artcle from The Harvard Brim- cussion has avoided the truth that
on may hlp iose "emitered yaU'Ve actually been picking apples
iyouths" to ward off the in New York State evwry summer
"lows of "x "u returning since you were thirteen and that
ii te ni mI you have relatively few facts at
your disposal concerning Europe.
FOR THOUSANDS of embittered It is a fortunate coincidence that
American youths, Fall will most students spending the sum -
prove a time of cr is. Muffled by mei overseas ia liiwise uni-
the tinkling joviality of cocktail formed. Knowing too much would
parties, certain students will be instantiy brand you as unauthen-
palies a tic and the advantage here lies
waging a grim struggle for popu- , n t d a re
larity and acceptance despite an with you. Your greatest danger
insurmountable handicap, This comes, in truth from others like
plucky lot will be f.iting to con- yourself who are employing Globe-
ceal the fact that it has never manaship and who are out to con-
been abroad, solidate their positions by ex posing
a few frauds here and there.
There are many who claim these You will know you are in or
boors are destined to utter igno- trouble when someone starts ask-
miny, and it would be totally un- ing pointed questions or picking at
realistic not to admit this is prob- inconsistencies in your stories. A
ably the case. It is not our inten- good way to parry such an attack
tion, therefore, to raise any false following a blundering contradic-
hopes in these already burdened tion on your part ("But you said
breasts by a discussion of Globe- you were in Paris during July!") is
manship, the miracle ploy of non- to reply with - deferent patience;
peregrinators. We shall merely "Oh no, my friend. I meant during IT S A
outline the concept as it has ma- my first trip."
tured.
T HE TIME will also arise when
POINT ONE is simple and ab- it dawns on a listener that you
solutely essential: you must couldn't possibly have had all the
read up on France and Italy, com- fabulous adventures you've been
pletely convince yourself you spend making up without being utterly
the summer in Europe, and set out fluent in some European tongue.
to humiliate those toads less for- When he confounds you with a
tunate than yourself. Your success sudden French or Italian phrase
at this stage can be quickly judged and demands an accounting for
by the amount of resentment you the bland expression on your face,
arouse. If you play your part well your play is this: "Why, I never
and effectively, you may become had to learn any French. My mist
actually despised. Beginners, how- . . uh .. . a girl did all my inter-
ever, are advised to compromise at preting." Needless to say, a dis-
being only somewhat disliked. crete look around and a man-to- ""
man tone of voice will enhance the
Although this is the guts of effectiveness of this ploy. If your
Globemanship, there is a steamer- tormentor has been feminine, it is
trunkful of indispensible ploys that safe to say she'll leave you alone
must be learned to back up your for the rest of the evening.
initial position. Looking European
will help. Buy a belted jacket and Should the conversation slp
a pair of black Italian sandals, be around to what ship you took to
, Europe, remember this point: you o
generous with tins of Players' cig-
arettes, and affect a slight diffi- either went at class on a palatial
culty in getting used to American liner or worked across as a stripper
liquor. Little things make a big im- on a grimy whaler out of Oslo.
pression: you might, for instance, There is no such animal as an m-
invest in an. MG. between ship. The last average ship
to make interesting conversation
You must train yourself to sneer was the Santa Maria. r
at American cameras and to make Since many successful ploysmen t
vague, rueful references to the Lei- have become absolute masters of
ca that fell overboard. The men- Globemanship, it would be sheer
tion of domestic wines is enough folly for an amateur to fight them
to excuse you, pale-faced, from on their own terms. For this pro-
the supper table, and the hesita- fessional clan, you must adopt cer-
tion of American girls to accom- tain specific ploys that work to em-
pany you almost immediately to barrass the "traveler" and make
"a little hotel you know" sets your him feel guilty for his "trip.

Sunday, March 27, 1955
M. CIT l-
0

_rI

TIGHT SQUEEZE "LOCKING" A FREIGHTER

GOOD TRICK:
Budget-Minded Find
Austria Inexpensive
By BOB JONES
Europe is no longer exclusively Regulations provide that not over
a playground for millionaires and 1,000 schillings may be brought in
off-duty GIs. per person. No more money can be
Over a short period, the average- taken out than was brought in.
Income American can enjoy a va- Austrian food is very good and
cation in Europe no more expen- inexpensive, Restaurant meals, us-
sive than one spent in Florida or ually served family-style, run from
California. Over a longer period, 35c to $1. Viennese cuisine is world
he can come out ahead. famous, and Austrian wine and
There is a trick to it, however, beer are as good as any in Europe.
the secret being in the country The neophyte at first should
the tourist chooses., take care not to treat Austrian
In Austria, for instance, prices beer with the disrespect usually
are such that a couple can live accorded American beer. Alcoholic
comfortably for $1,500 a year. Ho- content of Austrian beer is consid-
tel and apartment accommoda- erably higher, running about 18%
tions are remarkably inexpensive. in most cases.
A short stay in the best of hotels The country itself is high in the
with private bath and three meals north, with the Tyrolean Alps pro-
included can be had for $4 to $6 viding excellent scenery and swift
a day. ski-runs. To the south the coun-
In smaller resort hotels this try flattens out, small villages re-
price is reduced to $2. In inns, taining a charm quite medieval.
clean and comfortable, complete Number one tourist attraction 'is
pension is offered for $1.50 to $1.75 the capital city, Vienna. Famous
per day. During fesivals and fairs, particularly for its night life, Vi-
these prices are likely to be raised. enna is also a culture center. The
The rate of exchange in Austria city has three opera-houses, 14
is 26 schillings to the American legitimate theaters, and three the-
dollar, or about 4c per schilling. aters devoted entirely to operetta.

"LOCKING" an Ore Carrier through the Soo takes about 40 minutes from the time the ship
enters the lock until the water level is raised or lowered and the gates opened,
Your Travel Agent
Photog raphs
Courtesy tn Ann Arbo ..
Audio-Visual
Education 01U151110
Center TRAVEL SERVICE
12-14 Nickels Arcade NO 3-8597