Saturday, March 10 1945

T HE M IC H IGAN D A ILY

P/trt Fifinr

-'/ ," + +v vr rf r 1 1 age i ITeen,

1

'ffter Ball Is Over' Ann frbor Passion Begins

Vos, Qui Non Potestis Dansere,
Nos Vos Salutamus; 'Nuff Said
By GREASY GRIND
It seems only fitting in this Only 1,500 couples broken dow
publication dedicated to non-aca- into components, approximate
demic revelry that we take cog- 1500 men are victims of the m
qizance of the guy who doesn't go psychology applied by the ba
to V-Ball, member of the dying promoters.
race of individualist males who Assuming there are same 4,00
never bothered to learn how to able 'lsdied males on campus o
dance, all varieties, that means tha
It is these males, the backbone 2,500 intrepid souls have with
of any movement for indepen- womanhood and are not go
dence, who refused to lay out four to V-Ball.
skins on the line last Whitsuntide So in this corner of the V-Ba
when the call was put out for the Extra, a publication devoted
rubles to pay admission to the
dance. These males remained ad- gaiety, and yet under the cta
no more than a sad csmctar
amant- they didn't have four of masculine weakness, we ta
federal diplomas to their names, time out to salute those galls
and what's more- they didn't American males who weren't
dance. . the dance. To those of you w
Dancing was a practice in ill don't dance, to those of you t
repute when Byron wrote his manly to be browbeaten into pus
scathing tirade on the decadent log your wears' feet across a pot
art, already considered sinful in ished basketball floor-to all(
the first quarter of the 19th you rugged individualists-- G
century. "The waltz," he fum- bless you, Sirs!
ed, "is immoral," And so it was. ________
Since those days dancing has D - -
not improved a whit and it is still
probably immoral. However, mor-
ality based on mores is a scale
that is flexible and what was H idden Fact
shocking 20 years ago is passe
today. Witness women standing A o
in streetcars. ADOUt U
It was Cicero, if we are not
mistaken, who turned to the Ro- From sources too personal
man Senate and shouted, "O tem- mention here, The Daily has u
pores. 0 mores." If you can trans- coee h soihn att
late this, there is no danger of astothe sitoMshing fact th
+ eve goig asray. the University uf Michigan ho
you'r ever going astray. become the proud possessor
The principal objection to dan- three barrels of pickles from 0
cing is much more fundamental the are pickle dispen
than the picayune, pedantic ques- orthe lar pck dispensers
tion of propriety. The question These three barrels contain eo
settles about a much more funda-
mental issue. Is dancing exercise, 2' her s (s sced)so
we ask? And unequivocally the has mustad (y wed)-kn
_ eco aswer, TES!has been estimated by well-know
echo answers, YESl pickle authorities that this is e
As a child in the grade schools ough for 27 years of Ruthven tea
we were subjected to social if one out of every two tea-ge
' dancing. The program was part eats pickles. This, of course di
of the physical education of the counts the fact that Preside:
school, P.S. 143, and was a bald Ruthven and Bud may sneak dow
faced attempt to shove the muse in the basement and take a fe
of terpsichore down our protest- on the side.
lug craws. This immense amount of pic
The male has a psychotic hat- les is enhanced by the fact th
red of anything connected with the University may already ha
the elemental one-two beat, and vast stores or pickles under one
the stern discipline of the dance their buildings.
master. It was this rebellion to - -_ stake
juvenile discipline that has led to Merchant Mistakes
the deep-rooted hatred of any-
thing connected with tails, white TANGANYIKA, BELGIAN COI
tie and dancing pumps. GO-March 9-Herman Demo
However, under the weight of thenes Squabble, an Iowan me
social pressure applied by gregar- chant, today reported at the Sa
ious woman, man has gradually vation Army outpost in Tanga
succumbed to the hated , con- yika, that he had met a whi
straints of "la danse." But today, man in the jungle. "Dr. Livin
on the hallowed precincts of the stone, I presume," the S. Arc
University of Michigan campus, man said. "Livingstone, Hel
there lurk some independent said Squabble, as he was confin
males. to the padded cell gibbering
the time, "it was Eleanor Roos
velt in disguise."
Prompt Service
Wanted!N
/ on your
Wanted! Wanted! Wante
I am nineteen years of age (on
Appiicatton counting leap years), five-foo
two-inches, and weigh a demu
and three hundred and seventy-n
pounds. I love dancing, datir
Pa rt ci t necking, and other intellectu,
pursuits-in fact, anything th
concerns MEN. Every night
Photogra phs my prayers I always add a ver
for a man. He must be six fe
have blonde wavy hair, and a fi
Crowley Studio set of teeth. He must be chart
r SJ ing, an excellent dancer, and hav
a lot of personality. However,
321 South Main will waive all requirements. if h
is half-way human. Lonely

BEFORE V-BALL
You can be sure she went to
N/OUJE BERUTY S'fLON
307 South State Phone 8384

Annual V-Ball Short Story, On
Why, Wherefore of Campus Love
By BUD ROVIT
en Ann' Arbor. 1:45 a. in., March flexes it ostentatiously, and then
ly 10-The scene is the steps, porch, replaces it to its former position.
ob veranda, patio, or what have you, His Heloise watches him suspi-
all of any woman's residence house, ciously, but nonetheless with a
league house, or sorority on cam- show of visible admiration for his
pus. It is comfortably dark, and strength. Just then the house-
0 the silence is undisturbed except mother's senile treble is heard
f for the loud monotonous ticking from within the house declaing
t of a stop-watch, held by the that there is only two minutes
- housemother right next to the lacking two o'clock.
9 front door, inside the vestibule. On the outside this announce-
On the steps, porch, veranda, ment' is met with noticeable agi-
all patio, or what have you, a glamor- tation, as Casanova spends one
to ous babe, bedecked in sequins, and a half of Athes precious
ce spangles, cosmetics, and very little minutes, taking off his gloves,
ry else, is leaning her back against pushing back his starched cuff,
ke the door, and with up-tilted face holding his hand up to a distant
.nt is listening diligently to the wise street lamp, checking the time,
at words which her escort noncha- pushing back his cuff, and re-
ho lantly mutters, placing his gloves.
GO The escort, a handsome brute of "Yup, that's the right time."
h- a man with rugged features, curly "Oh darn, darn, darn."
oi- topped hair, and nicotine stains "Well, I guess I'd better be
of all over Iis gleaming molars, de- wheeling "
od , taches his muscular arm, and
places it against the wall next to "Well, I guess you'd better. I
the co-eds head, exerting enough really had a terrif time."
! energy to hold the wall erect like "Well, good night."
Cinaeus of yore. He speaks. On saying this, our hero bends
"Nice night, huh?" ' forward, plants a demure kiss on
MODERN DANCING-Pictured "Yeah, terrif.,,our lady's lips, and backs away
S with pre-meditated haste. The
above is a sailor dancing with "Solid dance, huh?" girl disappears within the reces-
his girl modern style. Back in "Yeah, terrif." ses of the house, and the fellow
1912 The Daily came out with "Boy, that was funny when strides jauntily down the street,
an editorial shaming the young Mugsy passed out, right in the thinking over what he'll tell the
to 'uns for their indecencies on the middle of the floor!" boys back at the -house. Such is
n dance floor doing the risque "Yeah, that was a riot." Ann Arbor passion.
aatd "Djah have a good time t
as Bunny Hug. The scolding fin- ." Somegastute-PROBABLE
of ally bore fruit, for this year not nig h " Some astute entomologist re-
of all home ftr th ot "Yeah, terrif." cently came to the conclusion that
t one couple werecaugh t doing "Yeah, me too" the jitterbug is not an inspect but
of the naughty Bunny hog-at At this point, our young Ltha- a human being trying to act like
least not on the dance floor. rio removes his arm from the wall, one. Could be!
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