Pace Ten

T HE MIC H IGA N D AILY

Saturday, March 10, 1945


Pnrp T~n THE MICHIGAN DAILY Saturday, March 10, 1945

Seven Types of Men on Michigan.'Hence Loathed Melancholy
CMmOf Cerberus and Midnight'


I Hail to thee blithe spirit; bird
thou never wert" poetic words of first love, perfume counter clerk
eats (as it Shelley?) have a at Helena Rubinstein s.
Sdeep, ine meaning to us as 'a Profound thoughts are stimu-
A d and other nature lovers, spend ated as we refect upon the splen-
the sunnier afternoons meander- id magnifcence of the natural
ing tbrough the grassy glades of foliage, here and there marred by
Qi0ves Advice .ID ewh rae
the Nichols Arboretum. the appearance . of ndiscreetly
Y "eep pep,"say th litleprotected . .. (Did he who created
To Lovelorn "Pee peep" say t thtt is great beauty ever dream of
sparrow to us, and Peep, peep the uses to which it would be
Editor's Note: Miss Gloria Glamour, we softly whistle in return. Care- put?)
the most popular girl on campus who fully trodding over proud blades AhNuts
has a date every night of the week of richly colored grass, we' nature After hours of careless wander-
and two on Sunday, has kindly con- lovers are enthralled with the
rented to be interviewed by The gorgeous panorama that meets tg, profound re ection and care-
Daily's roving reporter Brenda Starr b eye. Our ornothological in-t ful observation ... our light beast
Miss Glamour ascribes her success s r drows wearied, wearie from the
asa enin ttae o erthr gbstincts are gratified when we see intoxication of natural beauty.
as a femme fatale to her thorough r the chubby wood-thrushes cooing moiaino aua euy
knowledge of men and their ways, and But we linger until sunset for that
discloses some of her valuable and to each other on yon evergreen is the best time. Various persons
ihard-learned information below. limb. Members /of another spe-
springing up from the cover or
"In spite of the wartime short- ries, Moster-Jordania Americanus nature's greenery, frown at their
age there are still seven funda- also coo to companions, whose watches and hurry away for din-
mental types of men on the Mich- smiling faces reflect their admir- ner . ..leaving us alone. Mun-
igan campus," stated Miss Gloria ation for the wonders of nature. danity has vanished we reflect as
Glamour in an interview after V- Ah Bliss! we gaze with fluttering heart at
Ball last night. I Sordid thoughts of kissing the the great fiery ball disappearing
The most common kind of man '1girl friend under the mistletoe below the horizon... the steeples
found on University campuses is while under the influence of alco- of Ann Arbor the County
the intellectual type. According holic beverage are issipated by Court House, the radio station
to Miss Glamour, this type can ~ ''the fine atmosphere of the cam- antenna are slowly shrouded in
usually be recognized by a mop a paradise. Happy are we when the blackness of night's curtain
'of long, bushy hair. He is an ar- WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE?-This speciman of Michigan pre- we gaily trip along over pebbled , it is time to leave .. ,
dent communist, and is interested war manhood fits neatly into any of Miss Glamour's Cate- paths, deciduous limbs and limbs So in the darkness we cross the
in the theory of integral calculus. gories, but he seems to be rolling a peanut like all get out. of the arboretum . . - hills and threat through brush to
He is also quite willing to discuss Probably he is getting in training for putting his nose to the The fragrance of the natural the gate . . and thence home-
Freudian psychology with his grindstone all the rest of this semester. perfutnes of nature's growth reach ward to share news of our stimu-
dates-on a purely objective basis, - -t r-h-eour nostrils and tap the nostalgic lating experiences with the pet
of course. memories of days spent with our canary.
Sisters Under the Glamour ful advice and provide moral sup- what she is up against (It may - ---- _ _ _ ----- -
"The brotherly type can be port. also leave her with some broken
found most anywhere, college The third class of men in Miss bones.) Unless you are a girl with
campuses included," continued Glamour's classification is the terrific muscle and strong will-
Miss Glamour. "This is the sort of cave-man type. This kind of man power of your own, advised Miss
man in which a girl can confide can be recognized by his physique Glamour, it is wise to avoid the
all her troubles, worries and suc- and stature-six feet at least. The cave;-a type for obvious rea-
cesses with the other six types. first handshake with a man of the sons.
He is always willing to offer help- cave-man class will show a girl The misunderstood type may
seem quite shy at first," disclosed
Miss Glamour, "but with very lit-
tle encouragement he wil1
Union Makes Post-War Plan come quite vociferous, and gladly
tell you his life history. He is the
Planning now for full post-war employment on camous, the Union man of hidden talents and abili-
has inaugurated a study of job opoortunities. ties vNhich his family and espe-
Special jobs will be provided in the Union building for Union Try- cially his professors fail to recog-
out staff members who are unable to keep busy clipping publicity nize. Needless to say, he needs a
items from The Daily. Among the suggested occupations are the woman's sympathy."
following: In Miss Glamour's opinion, men
A committee of three will be entrusted with changing the of the Bohemian kind can usually
colored lighting effects at Rainbow Room dances. be found in the Pretzel Bell where
Several hundred indigent football players will be empolyed "illu- te are knon f their aility
playersto consume enormous quantities
minating" initials carved by alumni on the Tap Room tables. of beer. Outside of the Bell, Bo-
Work will be provided in the Billiard rooms, rehabilitating injured hemians can be recognized by
cue balls, their loud red plaid shirts and
A special permanent group will be delegated the responsibility orange or green trousers. In the
of washing the cafeteria drinking glasses, summer they go barefoot.
Undergraduate staff typewriter pounders will be required to in-' "The romantic or casanova type
is not as easy to detect as he wasr
crease their publicity output by 50%. ~n a eays," ctnasde wa
Work on the post-war planning committee is under the direction Glamour. "His corduroy sport
of 45 Union officers, all of whose names will follow if this copy is coat and surrealist tie have given-
not cut. way to khaki or navy blue.

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