I

THUIRSDA-i% jAN. 2" ,

THE MICHIGAN DAILY

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-*ASIDE'-
*LINES*
1- 'Sy IRVIN LISAGOR -
Please, Mr. Athletic Board!
OR peace of mind and the privacy
of our boudoir, we beseech Michi-
gan's athletic board to hasten the
announcement of its new football
coach as we can't hold out much long-
er. Being buttonholed on the street
by inquisitive people never really
bothered us, for we could feign total
ignorance and review an elementary
French course in the same breath with
a "Je ne sais pas." Reading letters, re-
markable for their sameness, re-
quired but little time and wasn't par-
ticularly irksome. Appeasing the
sharp curiosity of friends at "602"
was sometimes a task, but by hastily
encouraging a "barber shop" siesta
we could easily divert them. But,
gentlemen, when our sanctum sanc-
torum is invaded, we feel sufficiently
justified to appeal to you publicly and
confess shamefacedly that we've
reached the end of our rope.
Last night, a horrible night-
mare assailed us, and unable to
attach a Freudian concept to it,
we could divine only one thing:
SOMEONE IS TRYING TO
COERCE US INTO REVEALING
THE NAME OF THE NEW
COACH. We don't want to talk,
honestly. But when we're har-
ried in our sleep by grisly, grue-
some ghosts, we're tempted to
give up those ghosts and blurt
out our secret pronto. Hooded
wraiths with brown, clammy
hands flitted through our room
. driving nails into an ominous
looking scaffold. .. wheezing as
a man with asthma...
They bound our hands with the
bedsheet and used the pillow slip for
a gag . .. strapped us on a vertical
board 'and tenderly stroked our
cheeks with their cold, moist hands
. No one spoke . . . The Stygian
darkness grew awesome with silence
but the stroking continued .
Suddenly, one yanked the gag from
our mouth, almost jerking a molar
with .it . . . And in frightening uni-
son, with their lavender-hued fin-
gernails jabbing our jugular, shrieked:
"WHO'S THE NEW COACH?"
Fear, gentlemen, almost caused
a breakdown, but ever stoical,
we kept our yap shut and hoped
for a hairbreadth harry rescue.
Then we began to quiver with such
volcanic force that a seismograph
in the roam would have gone
completely haywire. "Get up,
Stum! Get 'up," someone rasped.
It was Roomie Larson, pounding
us on the back with a coat han-
ger.
So you see, gentlemen, this thing
may develop into a phobia of some
sort. And with exams coming on,
we'll need every mental resource, if
any. We don't want to appear sud-
denly weak and arouse suspicions
that we might reveal our secret, but
the end's in sight unless something
drastic is done immediately. Maybe
you could just hint the new coach's
name and relieve us of our burden.
We ask you with honest reverence,
save us from these horrendous ap-
paritions. And please hurry, for to-
night they're liable to bring the Sha-
dow with 'em. And then what ? ? ?
Blackhawks Purchase
Shill From Americans
CHICAGO, Jan. 26.-()-The Chi-
cago Blackhawks in the midst of a re-
building campaign and a fight to re-
tain their National League hockey
playoff chances, announced tonight
the purchase of left wing Jack Shill
from the New York Americans.
Shill, who also has played with the

Toronto Maple Leafs and the Boston
Bruins, is expected to arrive here to-
morrow.

atators SweepEvery EVent To

Down State, 67

Wait Tomski,
Ed Hutcheins
Lead__Varsity
Relay Team Sets New Pool
Record; State Garners
But One Second Place
(Continued from Page 1)
long lay-off of competition due to
recent injuries.
Dick McClurg and Bob Burke both

Fighters Clash In Open Division
Of Golden Gloves Bouts Tonight
After witnessing over four hours facturing Co. of Detroit has entered
worth of action in the novice divi- an entire team of Motor City fighters
sion Tuesday night and early Wed- who have been coached by Patsy
nesday morning, local fight enthu- Urso, former Golden Gloves bantam-
siasts will again pack the Armory weight champion.
tonight as open competition of the The Chevrolet Boxing Club of De-

'Golden Gloves tournament gets un-'
der way starting at 8 p.m.
According to Capt. Garnet J. Bur-,
lingame, tournament chairman, this
evening's proceedings will be limited
to about 20 bouts with those fighters

of Michigan waged a close battle over their chance Feb. 3 when they will
the 150-yard distance in the back- do battle twice if necessary.
stroke race with the former finishing Open Bouts Predominate
in front by two yards. While the open fighters will pre-
Creighton Noses Out Mack dominate in tonight's competition,
Wolverines Wally Creighton and there will of course be some novice
Ed Mack gave the fans, who packed bouts. Several of the University box-
the Spartan natatorium, another All- ers who did not get into action on
Michigan neck and neck struggle as Tuesday are certain to be in there
they matched strokes in the 200-yard including Cedric Sweet heavyweight,
breast-stroke race. Creighton took and Tom Root, middleweight brother
he first with a last lap sprint which of Sam Root who was a knockout win-
caught his gallant teammate un- ner opening night.
prepared to stay with him. Competition in the open division
Michigan State made its most effec- is expected to give the fans a lot of
tive bid for points in the quarter mile high class action. The Briggs Manu-
race in which Spartan swimmers fin-
ished second and third. Ed Hutchens, p
after churning off a fast 220 yard I
race, won the event as he pleased, but
man was outclassed by State's Wil-
liamson and fell victim to a late rally Chi Psi's defending champions,
by Spartan Tesar who gained the striving to keep abreast of the pace
third position. that the fast-stepping Phi Delta
The summaries: Theta oganization is setting, took
270-yard medley relay: Won by over second place in the interfra-
Mihiaf n (Burke.B nham Wrn wIr fraternity athletic standings this

troit is also sending over a team and 1
in addition, many entries have been I
received from Flint, Jackson andE
other cities.(
Fights Mix Humor, Action
The show put on in the novice classt
Tuesday evening was packed full of
action and humor, usually both. The
lightweight bout between two Ann1
Arbor colored boys, Robert Smith andt
Dick Jewett, was worth the price of"
admission alone. Both fighters were
strict advocates of form, Smith em-1
ploying a waltz step and Jewett a;
distinctive crouch of his own concoc-
tion.
When, during the third round, form
took definite precedence over ac-;
tion, Referee Let Philbin was heard
to mutter: "Come on boys, some-
body's gotta win." Smith was given
the final decision.
Almost Scores A Self-Knockout
In the wildest contest of the night
Don Riley of Dexter and John
Bishop of Jackson went at it tooth
and nail. In the first round Riley
wound up to let fly with a right but
Bishop stepped back to avoid it. This
didn't stop the former however and
he cut loose with, an uppercut that
he had trouble stopping when it
missed by two feet, almost falling flat
on his back.
Mike Rodnick, rugged U. of M.
lightweight, looks like a real fighter

Courtright To Offer Jump Elimination jtems that could make use of a fast
=bze ik and other of the tactics thalt
Golf Lecture Series Fails To Increase go to make a higher score have done
Isoand profited. But the remainder
Final Cage Scores have clung to the type of contest
Ray Courtright, Varsity golf coach, ~ 1lI Ag W 1? aecugt h yeo ots
has just announced the schedule for they have played formerly, and have
his series of golf lectures that are to One half of the Big Ten hardwood not suffered. And in many cases, by
begin next semester in the old wrest- schedule is practically over, and the improving their defense they have
ling room on the ground floor of the prognosticators who started the sea- been able to meet the greater offen-
Intramural building. l rgotcti ive threats of their opponents in an
son off by predicting gigantic scores, entirely satisfactory manner.
The series will consist of lectures, and visualized exhausted players be-
lessons, and demonstrations and will I
be given every afternoon except Sat- ing carried off the floor are beginning
urday and Sunday from two to six to wonder.
o'clock. The reason behind it all is that with
At 4:30 p.m. each afternoon Coach the exception of one or two teams, the
Courtright will give talks on "The play so far has resulted in games
Theory of the Golfing Stroke." whose final scores have, for the most
These lecturers will be changed every part, not reached any gargantuan
Monday and Wednesday, and will heights. Rather, so the statistics re-
continue for three weeks, when a new veal, the final gun totals have been
'series will begin. no different from those of last sea-
This idea is not a new one, having son.
been last tried in 1935, when about Illinois, Purdue Lead On Offense
200 people "took the course." The Highest averages per game are held-
series will begin Monday, Feb. 14, by Purdue and Illinois, the two Con- (
and the varsity and freshman golf ference teams that specialize in of- $00 $
squads will assist in the demon- fensive tactics which boast of fast $4. - $5.00 $27.50
strations. breaks, a maximum of shots, and at The Homburg and

Balinese Not Impressed
With Golf, Says Sarazen
NEW YORK, Jan. 26.-(jP)-Gene
Sarazen, former U.S. anid British Open
Golf champion, returned from an
around-the-world vacation trip today
with the claim that he was the first
golfer ever to show the natives of
Bali the game.
The Balinese were not greatly im-
pressed by the ancient pastime, he
said.

C
_j
5,

least one player who is up with the
top scorers. The Boilermakers have
an offensive record of 42.5 per game
while the Illini have averaged an
even 40 marks.
But the average number of points
per game for all Conference quintets
is only 36.2. Lowest average goes to
Minnesota with 30.8 counters per
contest.
Wolverines Best Defensively
On the other side of the picture
Michigan has the best defensive rec-
ord. The Wolverines' opponents
have been able to garner only 29.3
points per game. At the other ex-
treme the Chicago squad's adversaries
have been able to mark 50.3 times on
the average.
Average defensive record for all
schools is 37 points.
All of this simply goes to prove
that the elimination of the center
jump has not speeded up the game to
any appreciable degree. A few scores
have been high, but usually this has
only occured when both squads lacked
adequate defensive ability. Those

I
. I

,f .

IvIlulllg4li. k "Ui KC, 1XV11114411, vv rel va u, " past week, displacing Psi Upsilon,1
'T'emp-9.-Rd d

i

IF -

i

220-yard free-style: on by Hut- last year's runners-up. Although and one who is going to be tough to * Bo,
chens-Michigan Hoyle , Michgan, they have not won a single event to, stop. In knocking out George Hil-
chens; Michigan; Holmes, Michigan, date, they are only 25 points behind lard of Jackson, Mike displayed a
second; Ruhe, State, third. Time: the leaders, showing their well-bal- terrific punch in either hand and
220.- anced all-around strength. Hillard absorbed plenty of punish-
ski,-ichar ; rscond Emmett, MT - The fraternity "Big Ten" saw ment in the 1:57 time he was among Purdue
ski, Michigan; second, Emmett, Mich- the invasion of two new members the conscious.'Midh.
igan; tie for third between W. Bell last week. Theta Chi and Sig- Jack Cashdollar escaped devalua- W.
and Ziegenfus of State. Time, 0:23.9. ma Alpha Epsilon grabbed ninth tion when he won the decision over 

Ten Standings

w I tp
.5 1 206
31170
...4 2202
...3 2196
2 2 141
2 3 182
.2 3 190,
...24240
.1 3123
.03 95

Diving: Won by Staley, Michigan;
second, Benham, Michigan; third,
Calhoun, State. Winner's points, 322.}
100-yard free-style: Won by Tom-
ski, Michigan, Emmett, Michigan,
second; P. Bell, State, third. Time,
0:53.7.
150-yard back-stroke: Won by Mc-
Clurg, Michigan; Burke, Michigan,I
second; Carr, State, third. Time. 1:48.
200-yard breast-stroke: Won by
Creighton, Michigan; Mack, Mich-
igan, second; Brightman, State, third.
Time, 2:42.6.
440-yard free-style: Won by Hut-
chens, Michigan; Williamson, State,
second; Tesar, State, third. Time,
5:31.5.
360-yard free-style: Won by Mich-
igan, (Tomski, Holmes, Emmett, Hut-
chens). Time 3:17.5.

and tenth places respectively,
while Delta Upsilon moved up to
eighth place and Theta Delta
Chi and Phi Kappa Sigma slid
back to the eleventh and twelvth
post. The only other change was
registered in the upper bracket,
as Theta Xi and Lambda Chi Al-
pha exchanged fifth and sixth
positions, the former advancing
and the latter receding.
Following are the flrst 10 hous
with their point totals and the
standings last year:

Clyde Procter, Ypsi Normal boy,
after both were so arm weary that
the fight was at a virtual standstill.

otp av. oav
195 34.3 32.5
145 42.5 36.2
176 33.7 29.3
172 39.2 34.4
155 35.2 38.8
157 36.4 31.4
200 38.0 40.0
260 40.0 43.3
134 30.8 33.5
151 31.7 50.3
nts; otp., op-
av., average

1

BERG WINS IN FLORIDA GOLF
PUNTA GORDA, Fla., Jan. 26.-(P)
-Favorites again advanced today in
the second round of the Women's
Winter Golf Tournament. Patty Berg,
Minneapolis star, found hard going in;
her match with Mrs. Leo Walper of
Washington, D.C., but won, 4 and 2,
after being tied on the first nine.
1',

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