SUNDAY, OCTOBER 19, 1924 THE. MICHIGAN DAILY t1t -Sorts Mahally, Not Altrock, Napoleo n o Diamond wet, and that me and' not Apologies to Ring Lardner) To the Editor. A writer such as I is, as a gen. rule, above the efforts of some cheap buffoon to intimate his stuff, and this is the 1st time I have ever found myself in a position to make the pen the sword and defend my standing in the literary world. I refer, of course, to that comical fel- low Altrock, who has been reading this writer's paralizing humor for many yrs. and who now feels that he is able to tear of some stuff of his own which can hope to take the place in the heart of the U. S. public wh'ich my brain babies has always held. Now, in the 1st place, dear reader, Mr. Altrock has not only made a frugal-futile attempt to steal my inimitable stuff, but to place hisself in the top notch as a strategy, mod- istely taking credits for the victorys of Mgr. Harris and his Washington Senators in the recent World Serious. As a matter of cool fact, it is the writer who put the winning outfit ;cross and made them what they are today( Oct 13 inst.). As a man of the pen, it is my Ernest hope that my readers, Legion in no., will not ber iissled by Mr. Altrock's crude at- temps to intimate me because it is a plane fact, as plane as Mr Altrock's nose, that he cannot look X eyed at this writer. To prove my pt. Mgr. harris come to me before the serious was to start, with gloom wrote all over his contin- nents, and he says Ellswcrth, he say:., "how and the he-Il an I going to trim these here now giants." I am afraid'they have got the Indion sign on me." The writer smiled cooly, and flocking his mustashes, says "Bucky (I always call him Bueky) this is not time for gloom. "Be an optometrist with regards to the Serious and its yours. But lie says how do you mean. Well Bucky I comes back practically like a flash, "I will tell you how to do it. The big jam is yours because Ellsworth Mahaffy is on the job." He says yes Ellie I know". But I cut him short with a nasty look because it has always been a pt. with me to keep these athaletes at a distance. "Never mine the familities, I says but listen. You will cop if you will do as I say. "I am all ears Mr. Ma haffy he says "shoot". "Well by boy I says generally-genially, all you has got to do is win 4 games and the Serious is yours. Well, wile the boy' mgr. was getting his breath back, the writer strolls out into the open spaces, and makes some nasty cracks at some of his admires who crowd around and then goes back to find Harris in the same positions as I left him. When se sees Mahaffy breeze in he leaps to -his dogs and yelps ElIsworth you have did it I will win this Serious. two years after being promoted to the position of mgr. Poor old Jim is till back in the 3 Eye league because he did not come to Mahaffy for help. I cuts in and says now Bucky there isz a few' details witch is victual to this affair. In the 1st place, you must swing back and 4th with the giants for 6 games, in order to fool them. Do not let them in on the secret that you are out after 4 games, and in trock is all him is the baby who is the strategy of the 1st water. If any 1 doesnt believe me, I will talk to them. per- sonly and show them. ~Ellsworth: Mahaffy, HARVARD FANS LOOK FOR RETURN OF OLD DAYS ehrke And Hammond Approach Kicking Stars Of Former Years - ~, ~ a\ -~~ ~~iY -r i Th Caur.Jrn By We IH. S. Mecca has nothing. on Urbana. Thursday and Friday afternoon every road between Ann Arbor and the Illini lair was jammed with pilgrims traveling in every description of con- voyance. Ford andl Packards went side by side. Occasionally one of the former would drop out of the line for an hour or so for repairs but when the opening whistle of the great tussle down in Urbana was sounded, most, if not all of the Fordsters were there. Even mighty Chicago saw evi- dencos of the pilgrimage. Yellow -nd llue "Wrecks" paraded up and lown Michigan Avenue 'phur sday mdtl I'ridkay nights before continuing ,n their journey to the scene of the game. Villagers in small Indiana and Illinois tiowns were awakened ?rcm their' slumbers through the two nights by roaring hacks, hailing from Ann Arbor. It might be interesting to the in- habitants of this country to look into be way in which athletics are con- .lucted in England. English athletics ,.re as free from all *igns of profes- sionalism as those in America are illed with it. Not a single coach at Oxford, for example, is remunerated for his services. Captains of the var- ious teams and alumni who have played on the teams during their un- d-ergraduate days give all of the in- struction which is had by the athletes. Even the crew is not coached by a paid man. The variety of sports in which the English engage is la rgely responsiblc for the way in which they are con- ducted. Rugby, rowing, cricket, and the like do not demand the elaborate instruction which must necessarily be given to the members f football, basketball, baseball and track teams in this country. Michigan has just two teams which. are not handled by paid coaches. The tennis and golf teams , are or- ganized and coached by members of T the faculty. Men who have given their lives to the study of athletics and who arc paid for directing aihletic teams are nevertheless deserving of much consideration. Although considered as professicnal athletes by n'any, they are in reality merely supervisors1 n ARVA OWNED MoIa.NV TMs11 ! 14A04NG AW "- ig AY OP -r- - , ;w~t V-JE\E fAR ARDs 5ES T S DEst sr~k rLX AF~ P Two men are present in the ranks cellelit, ard he will probai}y (10 the ._'riison. In that year, he scored a .of the Harvard football squad who defensive booting all season. Ircp kick in the Princeton battle give promise of carrying out the past The past history of Harvard foot- from the 45 yard line, one against I tradition that the Crimson can wan .ball shows that the Cambridge in- Penns fro the 40 yard line and as many games by kicking as by any stitfition has boasted some of the, y other means. great est kickers in the annals of the many other less noteworthy goals. Howard Geh~rke, who was not in gr'i0ron spot. Probably the most The following year he hung la,' school last year, has returned, and sensational feat was that of Charlie a offv asagainst Corll, a shows all his old ability at booting Bnickley in the Yale game of 1913. feat that has since been equalled by the ball. He was counted upon strong- In that memorale battle, Charle on 88 Cl nd Walter one svel ly for the. team two years ago, but licked five field goals, ranging fron rIn 18y3, Cowling dropped one over became ineligible and was unable 38 to the 20 yard lines, for the only from the 55 yard line, the longest to play ins anuy o f th- games. Ie is i points scoredc- by Harvard. The final kick of its kind in Harvard history. devoting almost his whole time to score was'15 to 5. In the same year, mastering drop kicks and placements, Brickley booted three goals against A LIMITED, unabriged edition of and is so proficient at the art that Princeton,. and in 1912, he scored a six of'Zola's Rougon-Macquart series Harvard rooters predict a return' to placement from the 47 yard line will be published this month by Boni the days when ickley, Mahan, and against the same team. and Liveright. The titles are Nana Crimson stars of other days, In 1916, I~hrween pulled the Prince- 'translated by Victor Plarr, La Terre were in their prime. ton game out of the fire with a 35- translated by Ernest Dowson, La The other man with a toe that is yard drop kick, and in '15, Eddie Curre tra'nslated by A. Teixeira de bringing joy to the camp is Jack Mahan scored a placement against Mattes, L' Assommoir translated by. Hammond, who is. assuming the bur- the Tigers from the 41 yard 'mark. Arthur Symo-ns, Pining Hot translat- den. of practicaflyrall' of the p'unting? As early as 188x, Trafford made foot- ed by Percy Pinkerton, and Germinal llis sho-wi'ng to date'% has >been ex ball history with his booting for the translated by Havelock Ellis. P of athletics who earn every cent theyl! are paid and generally considerably more. The best football coaches in the country do not receive more thawn IC i I M- A Ann _.,. , I the 7th, run it for twelve innings in $10,000 a year. order that they will be misssled at l your actions. Use Walt Johnson (1I As long as we have our present always call him Walt) for the last system of athletics in this country. 4 frames (innings). When you do there will be a need for men to direct, not go ahead in 9 innings they will not and control athletics. If, at some far, be onte you ,on acct. they will think distant time, athletics should becomed you are not after the game. Then Universal and personal, rather than" get' McNeely to hit a 2 ply wallop I restricted and impersonal as they, (viz. a 2 base hit) in the twelfth with are at the present time, the peoples a pear of your boys on the sacks j of this country may expect to see the (bases) and the Serious is yrs. "almighty dollar" driven from a placer This evidents goes to show that Al- among the sportsmen of America. i DANCE. AT 0 RANGER 'S Drugs IK ~ d Yom'g Satisfied At the store you choose as your photographic head- quarters you want, ready for your selection, a coin- plete, up-to-the-minute as- sortment of Kodak and Brownie cameras. But perhaps most im- portant of all, you want to kuow that your films will be dcv loped carefully; that your prints will he on Velox, "top notchers" for quality. This is the store that's ready to take care of just such wants. You'll be sat- isfied-entirely satisfied- where the Music har- monizes with the Surround- ings, Where you may hear your favorite dance hits, and may enjoy. an excellent Tickets are on sale- at Slater's Book Shop (State Street) VanBoven, Cress & Thompson (South University Ave.) U'1 II