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November 22, 1921 - Image 3

Resource type:
Text
Publication:
The Michigan Daily, 1921-11-22

Disclaimer: Computer generated plain text may have errors. Read more about this.

@MBER 22, 1921 THE MICHIGAN DAILY

Reindeer Bill Passes State Body,
Santa Claus Happy; But WhatAbout
Forest Fire Waste In The Northland?

Buy your Mums for the Minnesota g
from the girls for the benefit of the
Woman's League building fund.

You'
will be able to strike a happy
medium be t we e n foolhardy
spending and miserly conser-
vatism by keeping a bank ac-
count
AT
THE ANN ARBOR SAVINGS BANK
RESOURCES OVER $5,000,000.00

1.

SUITS EVERY TIME
We Clean Clean -Odorless
CALL 2650-J

EXPERT
PRESSING
Ladies' Garment

/t;

CLEANING
REPAIRING

(By W. Bernard Butler) <
Prof. Russel Watson of the forestry
department introduced the adventur-
ous cub to a mythical legend which,
it is said, has beend handed down to
him by word of mouth:
Just before Christmas last year,]
Santa Claus was making his annualt
tour of the world in search of fast
reindeer flesh to propell his Dec. 24}
Special. The ravages of the practical'
workings of Darwin's theory had se-l
lected the best of his stock, so that
the dear old man was worried as toI
the means of rapid transportation he1
should have for his multitudinous
presents. He only had one lean deer.
And if this poor old beast should<
kill his engine In the middle of that
critical night in December, Santa
would have to hold a fire-sale with
pre-war prices to get rid of his anti-
quated stock. This is not to mention
the keen disappointment that all the
kiddies would have to endure because
the hoary old benefactor was unable
to fill their stockings.
An Idea Dawns
Just as necessity is the mother of
all thinking, our hero had to conceive
of some method of reviving the anci-
ent and traditionaliherd of fleet-footed
sleigh-pullers. The great honor of'
carrying out Santa's stupendous plan,
we are told, fell to the lot of a Michi-
gan citizen, one John Barrett, a lawy-
er of paternal instincts. The legend
goes on to say that Uncle John dis-
covered in his spacious sock last
Christmas, a little note that read
something like this:
North Pole
"My dear Boy,
"Realizing that you are always
heartily in accord with all pro-
gressive ideas in a state that is
the forerunner of advanced think-
ers, I present my humble plea for
your intervention into the Dar-
wininian theory by use of arti-
ficial selection. Since your are so
well informed on the subject due
to the fact that you once took a
course called 'Organic Revolu-
tion,' I petition you, I beg of you
on my bended knees, I lay myself
prostrate at your feet in prayer-
ful supplication that you may pre-
vall upon the legislature of your
sovereign state to set aside a
generous fund to buy some rein-
deers. I am in dire peril of los-
ing my ancient job.
"I hope that you will give due
consideration to my past gener-
osity to you and assist men in this,
my final struggle.
"Yours forever and ever, A Men,
"San Ta Claws."
Uncle John is Moved to Tears
We are told that Uncle John was
moved to tear's as he read this piti-
ful plea. Thereupon he made the
firm resolution that Santa's desire
should be realized.
Some months later, the story runs,
a legislative body, moved by the pas-
sionate implorings of an ardent sup-
porter of "Santy," shed tears lest they
be forever responsible for the "Last
of the Reindeers" and lest they might
be utterly forgotten in Santa's bud-
gett, created a bill appropriating mon-
ey for the propagation of the rein-
deer species and eating of reindeer
meat.
10 Bulls and 50 Cows
Now Santa is looking forward with
high hope to the coming importation

of reindeers to the extent of 10 bulls
and 50 cows. He says that the dim-
inuitive animals will cost no more
than $175 apiece exclusive of their
stateroom reservations, transporta
tion fees, and food aboard the Vater
land which will add, it is said, $50 to
their expense. Then, too, three Lap-
landers are also to be immigrated
with the deers so that the animals wili
not get homesick for their native
haunts and picturesque environment.
The statistical department of the
Lapland Sunday Examinationer re-
ports that the total cost of the rein-
deer project will approach $20,000.
$20,000 for 50 cows, three Laplanders
and 10 bulls.
Considering the Fires
Last summer in the Upper Penin-
sula there was a very destructive
forest fire that devastated the country
for miles and miles. What had once
been small hamlets, scattered farm
houses, and potential timber was now
a wanton waste of charred and black-
ened desert. According to recent sur-
veys in the annals of the forestry de-
partment there are, in Michigan, more
than 12,000,000 acres of cutover and
burned timber land that can be made
to yield from $1 to $2 per acre each
year: say $20,000,000 a year.
Men of vision have fought and died
that this land might be reforested.
They have dreamed of a time when
this land will pay this $20,000,000
yearly dividend. The $20,000 that the
heindeer and three Laplanders claim
could be used to construct 200 towers
at $100 apiece to guard the forests
from the ravages of the fire. The
dream of the $20,000,000 goes farther
into the future that visionary pro-
jects of Santa Claus may have their
way.

- - Gentlemen's Garments

Alterations That Suit
MASON & HANSON WOOLENS
THE BEST WOVEN - MADE TO SUIT
What's in a Name?
426 Thompson SUITS BROS.

e

Rocke Bottom Prices

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.LL r,,

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F,

I

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I

'MFTER
EVERY
MEAVL
WRIGLEYS,
Newest,
Creation
10 for
A delicious
peppermint
flavored sugar
Jacket around PeP-
permint flavored chew-
i Ing gum.
Will aid Your appetite
and digestion, Polish
your teeth and moisten
your throat. B129
The Flavor Lasts

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or her

*4. ARERCALYfR
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