lee I but I wring the Univer- lications. PRE.SS d to the use for tor not otherwise hed therein. ichigan, as second ret. Two weeks-wherein you can save yourself. f rom a disappointment that is irretrievable both to. your- self and to your friends: Vacation is not a time for high-brows .to count their A's and. B's, but. it. might well be used to consider the C's and D's. The Illinois "U" Y. M. C. A: is going to provide entertainment every day of the vacation for the students who do not go home. Is Illinois to beat us in everything this year? Take no stock in the story of the alleged world's end on 'Dec. , 17. According to many people, it ended on a certain May j, anyway. The 17th having passed without mishap we can now all heave a sigh of relief and become life mem- bers of the "I-told-you-so" club., Peace- Head Quits 1~rance--head: What's the us* of being a peace delegate if there is nothing more to. fight about?" Official Calender, at GRAHAM'S BOTH I 'DIAGONAL M '" r 1 1, I DETROIT UNITED LINES (Oct. 26,' 19i9) Between Detroit, Ann Arbor and Jackson MEastern Standard "Time) Detroit Limited, and Express Carssq-6 :io a. Mi., and hourly to 9 : o p. mn. Jackson Limited and Express Cas-8:48 a. mn., and every hour 'to 9:4$ p. hn. ($x- presses make local stops west of Ann Arbor.) Local Cars Last Bound-4 :os a. mn., 9:05 a. in. and every two hours to 9:o5 p. Mn., 10:o u. m. To Ypsilanti only, 11:44 P. M., £1:10 a. m1., and to' Saline, change at Ypsilanti. Local Cars West Bound-i :48 a. tn. and r 2o a. Im. I: Easily the best e eiin 5c The ..., .y a _.,. ... " ,.. _ . ,. I I gr or Dr Ir i __ The Guillotine i . ,. , THE PICTORIAL REVIEW Easy Number WEED BOCKMAN~-Mistressing. editor Assisant ,'editors-,,- Chelsey Tinfoil Flowered Leeks Editorial Daff-- Ronald Corporal Tillie Scissors. Glances Files Perennial Death Punishinent" EXTENSION BUREAU PROVIDES M OV IE S Extension bureau facilities of the University are being used as a clearing house for the -educational films sent out by the department of interior and the 'bureau of commercial 'ecooomics. There are 125 reels of 1,000 feet each stored, here to be sent out whenever requ~ested. These films deal with 'sub- Y jects of !ravel, industry, education, war, and history. Factories and business houses may have filmzs of. their- industries made,. and these will be sent out free of charge. by the bureau. Anyone' who will pay the express-1 age may secure the reels to use at any; meetings where no admission is charged. Schools, clubs, and- factories ' throughout this district are seeing the advantage of moving pictures as. ,AN ARBOR CROP SUET Excellent' CHOP, SttEY from 11:80O a. mn. to midnight Steaks and Chops 314 1. State A million thanks ay football card. St i! it I ra for as full Art Editor- Samuel, hot Dog tt cetera. Original Style 'of invocation '~Gargoyle wishes for .its readers (both of them.)' a very Merry Christmas (pr'oviding your suscrip- tion is paid) and .the happiest kind 'of a New Year. Plain old phrases those (like the rest of the mag- azine). but, they best express (Wells-Fargo) what we wa.nt to say to every one, of you. Until 1920 then, so strong. Young men always want smart shoes young man is a sort of a lexicon of shoes He knows just what he wants in a pair just where to go ;to get them. THAT'S THE REASONj HE 4.. , , ;, 'N 90T: ' 8. r I Athletic First Joke Skycjl--Whza dogs tail'like a vehicle? Pryhcj--Cuz it's allus wagon. Second .Joke PROF. MITHENTHAL's DANCING CLASSES AT THE ARMORY i 11 Pcy hx-Why is a running dog like a tailor shop? Sdtzvc--Because he pants. Third Joke" (From the Michigan Daily of November 1) Gargoyle to Compete for Cup in "College. Wit." --Number of judge. 'F] A c be g all les- tin- sing 5 as- Gross a 117 E.V -0 If this is )fl the cam- naal respon- aization for Discussing the contest, lchnrnn said, "At pres- ent the Gargoyle ranks amongst the leading college humor papers of the country. Its art staff' cannot 'be equalled by any other college paper."' I diotoria Pa-pa, what is the' Gar-goyle ? 'My son, you must not .speak dis-re-spectfully of the deadl. Isn't the Gar-goyle a joke mag-a-zine ? Yes, it is fun-ny how they ever sell it. Who wvrites for the Gar-goyle? :Noah, Ram-e-ses II, Queen Anne, The Amer- i-can Li-brary of Wit and Hu-mor and every-body knut the. Ed-i-tor. Why do they write for the Gar-goyle ? Be-cause they can-not write for the Daily any long-er. DIoesn't the ed-i-tar ever write any-thing? No, thank good-ness,he doesn't. You may go now. The les-son is ov-er. Holiday Season, I Preparations for Should Not Be Further Neglected This applies equally as well to those who need new clothing and Furnishings, as well as to those who have gifts to purchase for men or young rgen. A VISIT TO OJR ,STORE WILL CONVINCE YOU OAF T]HE DESIRABILITY OF TRADING HERE WHERE Hart, Scbaffner & )frarx S uits and Overcoats rcouncil. B~ut this a f raternity move. an agent f or the Aan and is asking an on the-campus. to this organiza- "during the holi- is f ormingI of his Fourth Joke Pcjhlr-Why is the Gargoyle like a soft boiled egg?1 WGzl'tyl-Because it is usually prepared in three minute. !in all styles and sizes are sold. The, high :quality of this line, the rich- :ness of the patterns and the fine quality of the fabrics are such that at ~'our prices great value is received. p' rof the way deer LIGATION is to, utilize every individually profit-- the spirit of econ- tion advocates just Silk Shirts House The Evolu-tion of a Joke "I'm smoking an awful lot of cigars lately." "Yes, you're right if that is one of them." -Gargoyle front page, this number. ALSO I' Ties ~1 Coats Underwear' Travel'g Bags Gloves Hosiery Trunks Pajamas H ats Sweaters Suit Cases { 4.. : fber of probations and conditions have :announced at' the Registrar's officN. em to indicate that vacation is' not *for certain students, a number of ide the semeste'r so far nothing much ound of enjoyment These people nded that' two weeks is a time of re- ,hich they can retrieve their lost rep- r .care to applv themselves. It is only American Library of Wit. and Humor. Vow" 3. (1897). Gargoyle, May Number. (1914) Literary Digest (Spice of Life Column) year. Punch Bowl. (0915) B. L. T. January 22nd. (0915) Yale Record. (1g16) 1 2.?. i i w w r 'a f4 sameI 1 a - i }i .. ,..1 1 A 1 i 1 Y A eule, 'Conltin, Tiegel Co. t Home of Hart Schaffner & Mar, Clothes SOUT: