ARTS Page 9 Wednesday, Ma 2, 99 'What universe? Has a Klingon entered that we don't know about?' - Jim Mullen of Entertainment Weekly, on the Miss Universe Pageant. Gouging and gushing from Oderus onic Youth perimental Jet Set, Trash nd No Star DGC Records Maybe thinking up the unwieldy itle for this album exhausted Sonic Youth's creative resources. After all, their best albums have had at most two words in the title: "Evol," "Sis- By Ted Watts There are plenty of happening things in space, but there is nothing else quite like Gwar. Played by a bunch of fiendish art school dropouts (and graduates, including a master sculptor), Gwar is a metal band with attitude and foam latex. On their new album, "This ToiletEarth," they pum- mel the listener with themes as varied as the necro-pedophiliaof "Baby Dick Fuck" and the tyranny of the eviler- than-Gwar Skulhedface on "The In- sidious Soliloquy of Skulhedface." The music is pretty stylish, as well. Some tantalizing horns layer "Saddam A Go-Go" to something quite a bit higher than speed metal, and the inclusion of a bit of cartoon composer Raymond Scott's work shows Gwar to be more than just another bandinto bestial sodomy.And of course, it's all just an act anyway. Maybe. "To tell you the truth, Ireally can't tell anymore (whether or not I'm in character)," says vocalist Oderus "Dave" Urungus. "It's pretty much a schizophrenic existence at this point." He proves this by slipping in and out of character throughout the rest of the interview. Perhaps it would be best to let Oderus tell you about his early back- ground. "I am from the planet Scumboggia, Syntho Womb #5. My moldy warframe was purloined bit by bit from various violent ghettoes across the solar systems and is com- posed of all that is bad, naughty and overly sexed, as far as aliens are con- cerned." As you surely know, he be- came part of Gwar, which was even- tually banished to Earth by the Master of All Reality, where they were im- prisoned in ice in Antarctica until they telepathically manipulated hu- mans into making hair spray, which caused global warming and released Gwar from their southerly prison. So, having released five albums, four videos and a graphic novel on Last Gasp documenting the rampag- ing, thing which is Gwar, one must wonder what their plans are. "By the end of this Gwar tour," explains Oderus (sounding like Donald Sutherland), "this world will be a burning nub of rubble in outer space as Gwar returns back to the galaxy, and getting the fuck out of Dodge, as it were, once and for all. Yes, I'm sorry, the human race is pretty much history at this point. So get out there, share some needles, don't use condoms, eat wild mushrooms, have sex with animals and all those other things you wanted to do but people on TV told you (that) you couldn't. Just go ahead, it's OK." Oderus explains what one can ex- pect at the epicenter of the coming ov "'yu, youuiuv Uwar, you're a nappy purple scar... destruction, otherwise known as their stage show. "Hacking, bashing, smashing, killing, crushing, whomping and stomping at the big No. 6 dance. It's all a big part of the show this year. I'd have to say that it's the most elaborate, most incredible, most violent, most spectacular and most smelly show we've ever done." And as for fluids? "Oh, geez, so many. Multicolored, too. Plus, the projec- tion rate is greater than ever. 30-40 feet easily. Burp. Of course the gal- lons of blood is usually measured by the amount of people who go to the show, but if you make me admit that it was just a bunch of hydraulic tanks backstage, I'd have to admit that it was more than 150gallons. Of course, that's a total lie." Oderus leaves you with these thoughts: " If you're as smart as you think you are, you'll be at the show, and we'll see you with arubber mallet upside your head." Gwar's "The ShitHitsthe Fans"tour hits the State Theatre Saturday, May 28. Showtime is at 7and the Ex-Cops open. Call 961-5450 for details. ter," "Daydream Nation,"and"Goo," for example, were all short on title and long on great music and incred- ible guitar technique, but had good songs of substance to hold together onic Youth's famous style. On "Experimental Jet Set, Trash andNo Star" (phew!), theactual songs are missing for the first time, as are the noisefests that embellish them. "Winner's Blues" sees the band go acoustic and sounding too close to Dinosaur Jr., and "Starfeld Road," "Androgynous Mind," "Screaming Skull" and "Tokyo Eye" are all plenty noisy yet lack the logic that sets apart e band's previous output. That there no Lee Ranaldo songs is another strike against the album, but as usual Kim Gordon elevates the coolness quotient and the quality of this album and shines on "Bull in The Heather" (by far the best song), "Skink," and "Bone." Does this mean sonic death for Sonic Youth? Probably not. "Experi- mental Jet Set, Trash and No Star" is W a bad album at all, but somehow does not seem up to the standard that the band has set. Maybe the next al- bum will better show off the band's "star" potential. - Heather Phares 'Trek' ends when Enterprise leaves television By John R. Rybock "All Good Things..." The title for the last episode of "Star Trek: The Next Generation" (tonight, 6 p.m. on Channel 50) is perfect. "ST:TNG" is a good thing, whose television form of existence is coming to an end. Yet the phrase is not finished, suggesting more tocome. Indeed, as the final epi- sode airs, the cast and crew of the most successful syndicated -A series are .--,- working on their first big screen effort, "Star Trek: Generations." The fact that the film is due out around Thanksgiving, only a couple months after the new season would have begun, has not kept me from falling into a funk. The movies will be able to do things which the television show couldn't. Namely, a bigger screen means bigger sets, bigger bud- get, bigger effects. But it won't be the same. And I don't mean that in a good way. The fact is that the emphasis in the movies is quick action, quick satisfaction for the audience. It's like the "golden age" of movie musicals. For many, the song needn't be very good, the production just had to be big. While we can look forward to nearly everything in the movie being bigger, it won't all be that way. Time c o n - straints be the death of "Star Trek" on the silver screen. My motherused tocall "ST:TNG" "that space show." Mom was wrong. "ST:TNG" was a space show in the same way "Hill Street Blues" was a cop show. They were settings in which very real stories about the characters, how they interacted, reacted and evolved, were told. The center piece of any good Trek episode was itscast. Gene Roddenbery put together an outstanding group of actors to fill an eclectic assortment of roles. And so far, I have not come up with an absolute favorite character (though I do know who I'd like to see die. Sorry, Troi). It switches from story to story, as characters continue to evolve. Data? The android who, in the pilot episode stated he'd give up all his amazing abilities to be human, yet who seems to have realized that it's not the goal of being human that mat- ters, but the journey. Worf? The Klingon, the warrior, raised in the human world. Over the courseoftheseries,he's grown, learn- See ST:TNG, Page 10 N. 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