Wanted: One good cook

Wednesday, August 4, 1993 - The Michigan Daily Summer Wek -9 -

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By COLLEEN OLLE But Mom believes in the Wait- she never wamed me about men who
Mom was right. In certain situa- and-See-You'll-Change-Your-Mind- cook for women. Heck, my brothers
tions,just saying "No" is not the thing When-You-Starve" ideology, which never got cookbooks for their birth-
to do. decrees that a student can live on day. She probably doesn't know they
A month ago a kid from a campI chicken patties and spaghetti for only exist, but I'm sure she has her suspi-
hadworkedatsentmealettersayinghe solong beforeanoverwhelmingappe- cions. Sheknows that I live inahouse
accepted the offer I'd made before we tite for more gourmet cuisine kicks in. of female non-gourmets who revolt
retumed to Ann Arbor. In a moment's As usual, Mom is right. against the stereotypical female sus-
weakness, when I imagined leaving Occasionally, my stomach ceptibility to domestication and/or
behind the camp's taco pizzas and grumbles for foods not found in my show no interest in variegated diets.
watery, red Zippy juice for my own customary diet, meaning any dish that We cook to eat, not to savor. Mom
microwave meals,Iofferedtohirehim requiresmorepreparation than boiling understands that students who cook
as my cook, The kid wrote that he'd water or opening a can. Every light- only for themselves have neither the
remc k..yTaderiedhickenwthtm,'d year, when I find money in my wallet, time nor the dependents to make com-
masedta sand apple cinnamon I dine out. Other times, I satisfy my plicated meals. She also recognizes
craving ongenerousdinnerinvitations. ourcooking forwhatitis,asameansof
muffins., His resume also included Last semester, I ran into a guy I sustaining life rather than spicing it up.
hamburgers,Frenchfries,crescentrol, hadn't talked to for years. He invited I'd rather gorge myself on fictional
and "plenty of other juicy things. metoabarandtoashowattheComedy treats like "Fried Green Tomatoes"
Muffins.,Grilledchicken. Inever cook Club. We had a few drinks and roused and "Like Water for Chocolate" than
such delicacies for myself. Should I a few laughs to fill up the space in our digest a recipe in "The Joy of Cook-
hire him? What would my mom say? "nice-weather-we're-having" conver- ing." Mom realizes that college stu-
She'd say, "Can't you cook for sation. My "See you later"parting had dentshavemoreimportantthingstodo
yourself yet?" really meant "Have a nicelife," but a than prepare pot roast.
If Mom had gone to her Maker, week later, he invited me out again. But she also sees how our apathy A
she'd be rolling in her grave at the "Well, I'm kind of busy,"Ihedged. towards serious cooking might endan-
culinary atrocities her 22-year-old "Oh, really," he said. "I thought I ger the existence of genuine home-
daughter commitsin thekitchen.Since might cook a dinner for us." cooked meals. What will our children
she's alive, she merely rolls her eyes, "Dinner?" I asked, feeling the di- eat? Microwave filet mignon and as-
sighs when she leams that I finally gestive juices slosh excitedly in my tronaut ice cream, at best. Perhaps,
know how to poach an egg and then stomach. during this epoch of instantcoffee and
mailsmeanothercookbook.Momgave "Yeah, anything you like. How minute rice, agastronomical gene will
me my first cookbook on my 13th about shrimp?" manifest itself in our progeny. Chil-
birthday - "The Nancy Drew Cook- "Shrimp's good," I agreed, imag- dren willprepare cordons-bleusentres
book," chock-full of intriguing con- ining the succulentmeatmelting inmy for their nuked-out parents.
coctions like Lilac Inn Consomm. mouth. Good, free foodforanevening Ofcourse,MomwouldsayI'mfull
Mom undoubtedly hoped I would de- of insipid communication? Sure. of baloney.
vour the recipes as eagerly as I did If Mom found out I sacrificed an She also says Ibetterhire thekid-
Carolyn Keene's mystery novels. evening for a free meal ... of course, just in case.
Granted, the recipes described delec-
table dishes, but even at nine years of
age, I realized how much work goes
into preparing ameal that will be con-
sumed in 20 minutes. I'd seen Mom H
baking cakes from scratch and culti-
vating a yeastmixturein our refrigera-
tortomakesourdough.Mom'snogour-
met, but she has the necessary pa- since 948
Bence, skill and even love for home-
cooking thatI both lack and reject.
Mom says, "You're going to have
to learn sometime."
During adolescence, my domestic
ineptness symbolized my rebellion Large round or Ti
against traditional female tasks like deep dish pizza Validoy at PackardHll 769-5555
cooking. Although there was no da- with one to(plu Maiden Lane 995-9101
gerinmyenrollingin HomeEc., the toppIng. ) L m one copon pnr order.
was no waming that I would refuse to
lea any culinary skillsfrommy mom. r mo ®m®®dm m m m m ®®>" ®
After seeinghow bland the "Campbel Vau99b S nsA 01190
SoupCookbook,"the"HersheyChoco HIGH UALITY1 BEDDING AT
late Lover's Cookbook,"herown copy
of"TheSweetSixteenCookbook"and f LOW WHOLESALE PRICES
other recipe books proved to my pal-
ate, Mom might have thrown in the $loo OFFAny Full Or Queen Size Mattress
dish towel and dubbed me hopeless.
* Twin $54.95.POTURE
FIRM
LEARtN TO* Full $69.95.FI
* Queen$99.95 . ocustom
>FLY 'a:ponOrders
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D ' 662-6806 a I 677-4729 Hours 10 AM-7 PM -86 I

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Sat. Noon-11, Sun. Noon-10
Free Parking!


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