The Michigan Daily-Wednesday, July 23, 1980-Page 19 THE ART FAIR provides ample opportunities to practice the fine art of competition. Last year, one pig brought in about a squirrel-and-a-half, or bartering. When you and twelve others each have your eye on a particular . one-quarter of an orangutan. squirrel or a special pig, bartering is about the fairest way to ensure a fair Last word on bartering By NICK KATSARELAS Everyone knows that the key to good salesmanship'is driving a hard bargain, and that is what you'll witness.at this. year's Ann Arbor Art Fair. And with the economy the way it is, rest assured some vigorous bartering will take place between entrepreneur and customer. WHAT MAKES BARTERING much more essential for the buyer is the traditional high prices of goods at the Art Fair. One look at how much some of the craftspersons charge swiftly quashes all those rumors about star- ving artists. For instance, never before have I seen flower pots cost upwards of $100. For God's sake, I just want a con- tainer for my plant's soil; it doesn't have to be imbedded with diamonds. Another gripe I have is the schlock they sell-actually, what they ask for the schlock. For the low-brows, there's plenty of turquoise jewelry, five-dollar caricatures done by some halfway house residents, and polished-rock, paper weights (these are my favorites, you may have yours). If you're going to purchase kitsch, you have to know how to barter the price down. Because it's schlock, there is probably something wrong with it, and you have to point out any defects to the artist, though diplomatically. "Wow! I really like that painting. But $20? Isn't that a little steep? - "WELL, YOU HAVE to pay alot for quality art." "Yeh, but this has a defect. Look-the velvet near the matador's cape is coming off." "Well, okay, I'll give it to you for $13, and I'll throw in a tapestry of John Travolta." "YOU GOT YOURSELF a deal." Bartering plays a key part in buying and selling. It has its roots in ancient Greece. Most of the Greeks were self- sufficient, but there were a number of Greek men who were only into poetry and little Greek-boys. Not being of the yeoman mold, the poets were in grest need of certain supplies, like food. A local resident, Bart, established a trading center where he acted as the liaison between poets, who received food, and the farmers, who received poems. Many of the poems reflected the relationship between the poets and the little Greek boys, which infuriated the farmers. This was unfortunate for Bart, since he was the liaison between the poets and the enraged farmers. He later became known as Bart the Mar- tyr. ANYWAY, THAT'S WHERE bartering got its name. One method of bartering is attempting to convince the other guy that it would not be to his ad- vance to hang onto whatever it is you want. A mugger employs this principle. He approaches a passerby, and in essence, says: "Excuse me, but if you refuse to transfer your wallet to my hand, Iam in the advantaged position of committing uncomfortable acts upon your person." Those who have been in this position realize the mugger is really in the ad- vantaged position, especially if he is firmly grasping a lead pipe. Another method is to bargain hard, bargain long, and bargain low. "HOW MUCH DO you want for that neat picture of the little girl with the giant eyes?" "One-hundred dollars." "One-hundred dollars! Your mother's a communist! I'll take it off your hands for twenty." "TWENTY BUCKS? WHY, you're "You sure know how to drive a hard nothing buta mongoose! Eighty." bargain ... mongoose." "Your great-grandmother's a com- munist! I'll buy it for $40." "$70." "$50." "$55." "53.75." "$54.50." Nick Katasrelas is The Daily's summer editorial director. He says he once bartered for a velvet Elvis painting in a gas station in West- land. .. - - _ - - I i NOW OPEN 118 E. WASINGTON Fea turing FISH & CH IPS " SA NDWICH ES " STE AKS OPEN FOR LUNCHEON AND DINNER L IVE ENT ERT AINM ENT WEDNESDA Y TH ROUGH SA TURDA Y- EASY L ISTENING M USIC COCKTAILS ENGLISH ALE 118 EAST WASHINGTON 663-9757 )M j L J Join The Daily Use Daily Classifieds