v * - I I t: , t p , . 7 , , w t-t- I * , f: 14 1 , . I 0 9 0 0 0 a Personal Statement: My quarter life crisis By Mariam Sheikh "So you're a freshman,right?" I sit there absentmindedly in my political science lecture, in my slight- ly awkward GSI's office hours, in a "mandatory" review session - what- ever the location, that question is always asked. OK - yes, I am sitting in your100-level class,yes Istalk you in office hours to ask a million ques- tions, yes I sometimes appear to be dazed and confused. Butno, I amnot a freshman. Instead, I'm here because I am trying to ma another year, another semester, an opportunity to take new classes in search of a subject I genu- inely like. That didn't happen as a freshman. But I am not a freshman anymore and Istill don't know what to do.I am in this middle phase of my life, sur- rounded by walls - by the distinct memories of high school and the dis- tant idea of the rest of college. And they are slowly corneringme in. I remember it too well: the antici- pation, the nerves, the senioritis and most of all, the fearlessness. Just like myself- not too long ago -there are eager high school students waiting to graduate, to turn 18 and venture off to college. Then there are those who turn21,ready to take Rick's by storm, their weekends - and choice week- nights for that matter - get more interesting.Thentherearethecollege seniors who, especially in the midst of a numbing winter semester, may be feeling excited about their bitter- sweet gradu- ation because it means they are about to enter real life. Then there's me, a ' junior at the Uni- versity, who is t still not l high schoolers anymore, and we sure aren't clueless freshman. But we aren't upperclassman or seniors either. I can't go to most bars since I'm not 21 and my fake never came. Shout-out to the guy at Silk Road that likes to con poor and innocent college Last April I turned 20 and I can't help but feel uneasy. I'm no longer allowed to be an immature teenager - those years are behind me. I feel nostalgia for my lost portion ofexpe- rienced youth. I feel nervous because I'm entering a new phase in my life, m- 2 100-per- students. ILLUSTRATION BY MEGAN MULHOLLAND cent certain of what she wants to do The people who with her life.So, what about students are stuck - we are getting older, but and yet everything will still remain like me? What aboutthose ofus who we aren't conquering any life hur- fairly the same. My routine of school, fall inbetween these two major mile- dies, we aren't accomplishing tay- work and play will not be altered. So stones? What about us? We aren't thing huge. why do,I feel like I'm dropping closer to oblivion? This is my quarter life 'W"T A ~ crisis. IN AC RED IT criL OK, well obviously it's not a full- 1h.JL VL UN IO N . blown quarterlife crisis. I am20, not 25--but you get the idea. Up until now, most of my life has beenspentenduringnumeroushours of school five days a week. Think about the countless hours spent sit- ting in high school classes blankly, not taking anything in. Think about, * I :' the times you were forced to sit ML'hthrough a two-hour mass once a week. Think about the number of times you googled your math home- work and memorized the steps, just to pass a class. And then college came - a time when I thought I would take classes I would love and enjoy. While this did come eventually, it was first met BLUE DEBIT CARDS! byamultitude ofrandomand not-so- exhilarating courses. I think about the year wasted trying to findwhat I love and what I would be passionate about, only to find out what I hated and would never take again - a nec- VSVSAessary part of the process, perhaps? I can't help but think about this and wonder what I could have been doing [r instead. Don't get me wrong, school is _uWy-B ___K__a__hrt____important. A holistic education is .. n a~ort e. ...eeel..ts-s~p~niexo srarbs ;ray.4 R important. But just think of the hob- bies I could have taken up. I could have learned how to dance. I could have learned to play an instrument. I could have actually learned Ital- ian (not just struggle to pass four required semesters) -but there sim- ply wasn't enough time.I do have my hobbies, but they are lackluster and there isalwaysthe want for more. I remember all of the times when I said "no" to going out to stay in and study for an exam that I ended up doing average on anyway. The days spent locked in my dorm or apart- ment taking notes and reading pages of textbooks. The times whenI didn't even go outside so I could get more work done. Where does it end? When does it end? The hope is that we work hard now to get a decent career going, and then what?We get rich,we retire, we move to Florida and tan for the rest of our lives.Oh,ifonly it were that easy. In reality, we keep working hard to keep that career going. To be pro- moted one day. Which is all fine and well, if you love your job, But that's not always the case. They call it pay- ing your dues.Work acrappy jobuntil you are middle-aged,thenpeople will respect you and take you seriously. I don't know about you, but when I'm middle aged, I don't wanttohave just started my career. Turning 20 means that Iam clos- er to graduating closer to the next chapter. So everything I do now will shape the person I will become, in every facet of life. Ideally, I would want to work in either the fashion or entertainment industry. My obses- sion with pop culture, celebrities and their noteworthy events make me perfect for it.While we aretoldto fol- lowourdreams,thefactis,theyneed to be realistic too. I want to be like Jennifer Law- rence, who earned her first Oscar at age 22. I want to be one of those peo- plewhomakealife-changingappone nightein their dorm. Iwant to be that girl who happens to be in the right place at the right time and makes a network of connections that setsher up for life. I want to be the youngest Fortune500CEO,orwriteabookout of college. The heart warts what it wants and yet it gets something else entirely.Itgets a contracttobe a data analystinacubicleforafewyears.An offer to be an assistant to asecretary, a job plagued with "administrative duties."Itgetstolivebackhome after experiencing years of college free- dom- itgetsthe real world. READ THE FULL STORY AT MICHIGANDAILY.COM