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December 04, 2013 - Image 11

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The Michigan Daily, 2013-12-04

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WedesayDeembr , 013//Th taemn

The least reported crime
by Rachel Premack

4~ight after his girlfriend raped
him, she apologized.
"She had a boyfriend who told
er that girls shouldn't make noise
while they were having sex," Rackham
student Ben Alterman said, twisting
his pinky over his ring finger as he
discussed his second sexual abuser.
His memory of that day is foggy. He
can't exactly remember how he went
from her living room to her bedroom.
He was 16 years old.
"There was no conversation,"
Alterman said. "There was no, 'Is this
okay?' I felt trapped, I didn't have an
option. I didn't feel safe."
,Now an on-campus activist for male
survivors of sexual assault, Alterman
realized in recent weeks the likelihood
that his high school girlfriend was
abused herself - possibly by that
ex-boyfriend who insisted she stayed
silent during sex. That could explain
why she thought this sort of coercion
during sex was normal.
Alterman thinks consent is excluded
from the cultural conversation.
Grabbing a woman's hips from behind
is the requisite way to ask for a dance
-d movies show guys endlessly
pursuing a girl until she "gives in."
Many balk at the idea that men, who
are supposedly constantly sex-starved
and domineering, can be victims of
sexual assault too.
"As a survivor, I feel regularly
confronted with the question of, 'What
is masculinity and what is masculinity
in my life?' "Alterman said.
One in six
Rape of males is the least reported
crime, according to MaleSurvivor
Vice President Chris Anderson. This
organization was the first in the
country dedicated to helping men and
boys heal from sexual victimization.
Many of the statistics, for this
reason, are not definite. It's estimated
that one in 10 sexual assault survivors
are men. One in six men experience
sexual abuse before the age of 18.
In the case rape, 1 in 33 men are ,
compared to 1 in 6 women.
4j\ost issues that male and female
sexual assault survivors face - such
as guilt, shame or anger - after an
incident are similar, said Rackham
student Jamie Little. Little studies
the intersection between law and
male sex crimes in the Department of
'iociology.
Statistics reflect one difference

between the genders: the age in which
the crime occurs. Sexual Assault
Prevention and Awareness Center
Director Holly Rider-Milkovich
explained that male survivors at the
University and at college campuses
nationwide are usually abused before
their college years. The most common
age for sexual assault for men is 8-18,
Rider-Milkovich said, compared to
16-24 for women.
Before being raped as a teenager,
Alterman was repeatedly abused as an
8-year-old by an older neighbor. The
neighbor would force him and another
boy to rub their genitals together in
Alterman's bedroom.
But for many boys, a close adult
- a. family member, coach, religious
official - is the common perpetrator

the funds - or do not recognize ma
rape or partner abuse as possible -,
give male survivors proper resource
Anderson said.
Stigmas shroud the true number
male survivors. However, Anders
said abuse does not discriminate.
"Sexual abuse affects people fro
every gender, age, race, religion ar
socioeconomic class," Anderson sai
"You will find them in all walks
life."
Internal struggles
Despite its pervasiveness, ma
rape is not commonly discusse
In fact, many male survivors fa
great difficulty in talking about the
experiences.

"You feel like sexual abuse
... it's almost like this disease
you have and you tell people.
and you can infect people.lt's
like you're like a leper"
- D. Lyons, LSA sophomore

le masculinity: power. In a traditional
to view, he explained, the most venerated
es, men dominate athletically, are flush
in cash, and attract women. Men are
of valued for their ability to control or
on best others.
"The history that I feel as a man
m that I carry is one of power," Alterman
nd said. "I am taught to be powerful, to be
d. authoritative, to be controlling, to be
of aggressive."
Sexual assault takes that power
away. This can make some people
question if they are truly male when
they link power and masculinity so
le closely.
d. "You are subjugated by someone else
ce and done so in a way that is shameful
ir and creates a lot of self-loathing and
guilt," Alterman said.
Other effects of rape mirror
women's trauma: disruption of eating
or sleeping patterns, anxiety, low self-
esteem, depersonalization and a host
of other symptoms.
Lyons said the abuse, followed
by the death of his parents in his
adolescence, spawned certain
personality traits that seem almost
impossible in the gregarious
Residential College student.
"The big thing is being distrustful
of people, feeling like I've always had
to look out for myself, always being
a distrustful person," Lyons said.
"There've been a lot of times where
I've just been an asshole and it's not
okay. But it's also like at least three
different big fuckin' events in my
life that made me have to forge for
myself."
The question of sexual pleasure
can compound emasculation.
Anderson said men are biologically
driven to become erect with genital
stimulation, regardless of mental
state. Shock and terror can sometimes
te even lead to an erection.
ns Male ejaculation is also a physiological
is response that does not signify
he enjoyment or consent, similar to females
he who orgasm during rape. Alterman
of explained that he ejaculated as a 16
year old simply to make the experience
nd end. Still, this visible response can be
e. manipulated by rapists of men.
ke "It becomes a hook that perpetrators
se can use against a survivor to say, 'See,
su you enjoy this. This is something that
's you really wanted. This is natural, this
p, is what happens when people who like
each other touch each other in these
es ways,' "Anderson said.
es CONTINUED ON PAGE8B

FROM PAGE 28
band, the song, the children's
choir, the sunset. I've loved music
for as long as I can remember,
writing my own songs a la Taylor
Swift in high school documenting
my (lack of) romantic endeavors.
And in college, I turned to my
guitar as I finally explored what
it means to fall in and out of love.
Music became my release. But
I learned it truly loved me back
that moment in the audience,
dancing and singing not with a
boyfriend, a best friend or even an
acquaintance, but a mass of peo-
ple I'd never met from all walks
of life. "Love" was something I
never thought I could feel alone
in a crowd, yet I loved each and
every stranger surrounding me
for losing that term "stranger"
the moment the band played their
first chords.
The mud took shoes, iPhones,
half-eaten fish tacos and joints
that weren't quite finished and
dropped with an, "Oh, shit." But
the mud also took away my fears
about music festivals. Maybe being

ILLUSTRATION BY MEGAN MULHOLLAND
in a crowd alone can be lonely, night or dealing with life's chal-
but when a band is playing a song lenges - and everyone around
that defined a moment in your life you sings it with the same convic-
- whether studying late into the tion, it's impossible to feel alone.

on the record
"I don't think there was much arm-bending to get people
in ... people just wanted to be part of the silliness."
- STEVE CARELL, "Anchorman 2" actor, about getting original
cast members to sign on to the sequel.
"Phil is possibly her most badass character yet: a
forgiving woman with dignity and grace, one who
doesn't pretend to be someone she is not."
- NATALIE GADBOIS, Daily Arts Writer, aboutDame Judy
Dench's portrayal of Philomena Lee in her newestfilm "Philomena."
"There's no point of saving your best for the last game of
the season when every foreseeable goal is out of reach."
- EVERETT COOK, Daily SportsEditor, after the Michigan
Football team's one-point loss to Ohio State on Saturday.

After 123,000 votes
were cast from around
the world, the panda cub
born at the National Zoo
has a name - Bao Bao
- meaning "precious"
or "treasure," according
to the Washington Post.
Following tradition, the
name was announced
on the 100th day of the
panda's life. Here's to
you, Bao Bao! T

Always forgetting to order your textbooks
untilthe last minute? Fear no more, Amazon
is working to get you your order in 30 minutes
or less with the help of drones. Orders could
be landing on your doorstep as soon as 2015.

1'

Mai

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I

of sexual assault. There's a "grooming"
process where the perpetrator
attempts to build trust with his or her
target. This better allows the abuser
to manipulate the child into not
reporting the abuse. Rider-Milkovich
said this type of abuse is disconcerting
for children who have likely never had
a sexual experience before.
Rider-Milkovich added that SAPAC
has seen, in recent years, a "number
of male students" who have been
abused on the University campus by
men and women. She. emphasized
the importance of resources for all
survivors regardless of gender. Some
cities and communities do not have

A mentally challenged classma
abused LSA sophomore D. Lyo
when he was in first grade. After h
principal punished him for saying tI
word "hump" to describe the abuse, k
told his mother after two months
repeated experiences.
Lyons never saw the boy again, at
no one ever asked him about the abus
"You feel like sexual abuse, it's li
this thing, it's almost like this disea:
you have and you tell people and yt
can infect people," Lyons said. "It
like you're like a leper. It's messed u
man."
Alterman said sexual assault depriv
men of what typically characteriz

-In

The D is bankrupt.
A federal judge ruled
Tuesday the bankruptcy
claims were filed
correctly, givingthe city
the'go-ahead to not pay
back billions of dollars
owed, according to
CNN. This bankruptcy
makes it the largest city
bankruptcy in history.
The city can now create
a plan to cut their debt,
which needs to be
approved bythejudge.

II

Bad news for celeb chef Mario Batali: Crocs
is discontinuing his signature bright orange
pair of rubbery shoes. What's a celeb chef to
do when his iconic foot ware is about to go
extinct? Buy 200 pairs of course! And that's
just what he did.

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