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Tuesday, March 19, 2013 - 5

Ushering in the
era of Justin
Timberlake

'Swarm' delivers action-
packed strategy gameplay

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eady or not, world - the others, right?). Without any
Justin Timberlake just "Club," Justin would've never
released another album, been recruited (along with JC) by
collective wails and whis- legendary boy-band manager Lou
"thank you" 's of a whole Pearlman. The rest, as they say,
tion of is history.
vers. Even some of the more casual
re you Justin fans know the story, the
"Mir- eye-poppingDisney show lineup
the and rise to fame. But there's also
that aslot of Justin that doesn't neces-
s like sarily reach the public eye, or that
oard we've just sort of forgotten about
tay ELLIOT along the way (and yes, this did
the ALPERN involve researchingJustin Tim-
ven berlake at the library for an hour;
or at I don't need your judgment).
Suit & Tie" (which Barney For instance, I have to admit
How I Met Your Mother" that JT seems likea cool dude;
be prudent to choose as what with his recent induction
'me song). Regardless, into "SNL" 's five-timers club as
you've been stuck in a one of the better "SNL" hosts of
le for the past few months the decade. The guy made "Dick
'N Sync-hole, for those ina Box." EvenI would go hang
n the past few decades), out with the superstar if invited
re you're aware that we'll - it seems like it would be a blast.
hearing about Justin Except that, well, I don't know
rlake non-stop 'til Taylor how much of that image to trust.
drops another best-seller. Ilike to hope that, maybe with
 ... maturation, this isn't the same
oiler alert. 20/20 Vol 2 guy who wrote and performed
out in nov. (10 songs the McDonald's anthem "I'm
10 songs later = 20 Lovin' It," and later claimed, "I
)" - perhaps not the most love what McDonald's is doing
lbum-release announce- with the new 'I'm Lovin' It'
n recent memory, but campaign ... We share the same
love nonetheless offered crowd - people who like to
ove response to a New have fun." Clearly, he doesn't eat
'imes article Saturday, at fast-food chains; I've never
has since been confirmed. seen anything close to "fun" at a
means, well, if we're McDonald's. But from Disney, to
we probably won't stop boy band, to McDonald's, who's
g about JT until Blue ivy to say that the public gets an
finishes that debut we've accurate, un-modified view of the
xpecting. star? How do we know we're not
gettingsold?
But even the details of his
Step aside personal life sound so perfectly
vulnerable and simultaneously
iber - the , cool. Satisfyingthe obvious
first requirement for beingan
eal Justin's "awesome celebrity" (givmngto
charity), Timberlake donates
back. to children's hospitals, wildlife
foundations, arts foundations -
you name it. And yet, he owns a
stake in the Memphis Grizzlies
spect Justin Timberlake basketball team, showing us that
han anything else. The guy he both has a healthy interest in
nsistent pop hit-maker, one sports andsupports the town he
anaged to claw his way grew up in.
the wreckage of'N Sync's Damn. It's hard to find fault
al demise to become one of with the man. Even his (pur-
t names in contemporary ported) dating record reads like
And even in a vacuum, a list of Esquire's sexiest women:
in still managed to cop a Britney Spears, Cameron Diaz,
om Janet Jackson on live ScarlettJohansson and finally
ion, in front of the largest Jessica Biel. And in his spare
dience there is - and that time he even once accompanied
fore he decided to bring U.S. Marine Kelsey De Santis to
ack. the United States Marine Corps
io, though I've been ina bit birthday ball, just for the sake of
shing mood lately, I'll do asking him. That is a classy move,
h thing to the guy - rather, my friends.
ually keenly interested. So I guess the guy is perfect.
Justin from'N Sync now Yes, he's ruthless in his pursuit of
revered, jack-of-all-trades fame, but which successful stars
ty? aren't? Realistically, the only
super-fans among you flaw with JT's record is his low
be screaming "The Mickey number of solo releases - just
Club" - but if so, please three as of The 20/20Experience.
m sure you're disturbing And we all know that's bound to
eighbors. And you're only change.
right anyway. Justin did In summary ... prepare your-
r on "The Mickey Mouse self for the Era of Timberlake.

StarCraft fans will
embrace latest
expansion
By JULIAN AIDAN
Daily Arts Writer
A solitary marine looks across
a battlefield surrounded by car-
casses, both human and alien,
shrapnel from
fallen tanks A
embedded in the
ground along- StarCraft
side shards of II: Heart of
glowing foreign
technology. As the Swarm
a member of the Microsoft
Terran Domin-
ion's army, his Windows,
job is to defend Mac OS X
his people from Blizzard
any threat: resis-
tance, invasion
from a hostile race of technologi-
cally advanced religious fanatics
(the Protoss) - that sort of thing.
No amount of training prepared
him for what was to come next.
A rumbling in the distance, the
sound of thousands of claws
steadfastly advancing forward, is
his only indication that millions of
beings bred and built for universal
domination are closing in on him
under orders from their queen.
This is a familiar situation for
anyone who has entertained even
a passing interest in the "Star-
Craft" series. One of today's most
popular real-time strategy games
and a pillar of eSports, "Star-
Craft" has evolved over the last
15 years into a worldwide sensa-
tion, with hundreds of thousands
of fans tuning in to major tourna-

"Spring Breakers: The Game.'
ments where professional players
pick their race of choice in one-
on-one tests of skill.
"Starcraft II: Heart of the
Swarm," the second expansion in
the "Starcraft II" trilogy, brings.
the chaos of total war to single
and multiplayer. The campaign
follows the series's epic story of
love, loss, betrayal and intrigue.
Players control Sarah Kerrigan
as she uses a never-ending army
of nightmarish extraterrestrial
monsters - the Zerg - to exact
justice on the people of the Ter-
ran Dominion and its leader. Hav-
ing transformed from a Ghost
- the futuristic equivalent of a
psychic SWAT member - to the
Queen of Blades, Sarah aims to
reunite every faction of the Zerg
into her hate-fueled regime.

The 27-mission, single-player
storyline is expertly crafted,
with excitement at every turn.
Players find themselves con-
fronting threats, both new and
ancient, and have to use every
weapon in Kerrigan's arsenal to
come out on top. Brimming with
high-quality cutscenes, writ-
ing and acting, it's an enraptur-
ing story with incredible replay
value: Four difficulty levels
challenge players at every level,
and a wealth of achievements
are available to those devoted
enough to try and complete them
all.
With it, "Heart of the Swarm"
brings new units and mechan-
ics to multiplayer. Each race is
given new units while having old
ones tweaked, creating a num-

ber of never-before-seen strate-
gies and army compositions. The
professional scene has already
(for the most part) switched over
to the newest expansion, and the
matches are more exciting than
ever - new Zerg flyers, Vipers,
can pull vulnerable units out of
position while locust-birthing
Swarm Hosts lay siege to enemy
bases; Terran mechanical troops
are more fearsome than ever,
and the Protoss can take to the
skies faster and with more fire-
power than ever.
Time will tell how well the
new strategies fare and evolve
in the competitive scene, but for
now "Starcraft II: Heart of the
Swarm" is delivering some of the
best real-time strategy gameplay
both on and offline.

HM RIEVI[W
Comedic potential of cast
vanishes in 'Burt Wonderstone'

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CONRAD FOREMAN Mind"), a street magician whose
Daily Arts Writer unorthodox style has taken the
media by storm.
many people, magic is a The role allows Carell to show
escape the world, boggle off his asshole side. Though it has
nd - make the impossible certainly been shown before (his
possible. role as Evan in "Bruce Almighty"
s Vegas, . being the most memorable exam-
vorld of ple), this character is a far cry
ional The Incredible from the likeable chump-type
is a dog- Carell has played so well in films
cut- such as "Anchorman," "The
industry Wonderstone 40-Year-Old Virgin" and "Din-
shows At Quality16 ner for Schmucks." Between his
sm at its andtave objectifying of women, disregard
(c'mon, and Rave for friendship and general rude-
idy's got New Line ness with which he treats people,
fit from it's a wonder that his one-time
of chil- assistant, Jane (Olivia Wilde,
"Tron: Legacy"), would be so
Incredible Burt Won- willing to aid Burt in his attempt
ie" has a cast featuring to reclaim the Vegas stage.
najor players in the world Jim Carrey is funny and
edic film, but isn't able to creepy as David Blaine/Criss
[ze on the wealth of tal- Angel-type magician Steve Gray.
stead, the jokes are stale, His over-the-top tricks, which
ry is uninspired and "Burt include cutting open his own
rstone" firmly establishes face in an elaborate card gag as
s a film that will soon fade well as drilling a hole into his
idiences' memories. head, satirize this style of magic
cleverly, but Carrey is still able to
make the character his own -his
ven Carell's signature ridiculousness on full
display.
es don't land. Where the film lacks is where
issupposed to thrive - com-
edy. Aside from Carrey, who
should've had more screen time,
film tells the story of Burt "Burt Wonderstone" doesn't cre-
rstone (Steve Carell, "The ate the laughter that its cast cer-
r-Old Virgin") as he falls tainly had the potential to fulfill.
with magic, becomes the The majority of Carell's punch-
opular magician perform- lines fall flat (though a magi-
the Vegas strip, falls from cal bedroom scene with Olivia
nd must prove himself by Wilde is very well done), as do
sring his passion and popu- those of Steve Buscemi ("Big
mid adversity found in the Daddy") and James Gandolfini
f Steve Gray (Jim Carrey, (TV's "The Sopranos"), whose
al Sunshine of the Spotless jokes become repetitive early on.

Gandolfini's bit about not being
able to remember his son's age is
perhaps funny the first time, but
it's drawn out too long. It could be
a nice aside, but it has been done
too much before to serve as the
primary source of comedy for any
character.
Even Alan Arkin ("Argo"),
though he brings heart to the
story and is always a delight to
watch, doesn't add much sub-
stance to the film as Rance Hol-

loway, Wonderstone's childhood
idol.
"The Incredible Burt Won-
derstone" is cute above all
else. It isn't the laugh riot that
it could have been, but it's an
overall enjoyable film and has a
few moments that successfully
tap into the vast comedic capa-
bility of its cast. Perhaps "The
Mildly Entertaining Burt Won-
derstone" would've been a more
appropriate title.

with Britney Spears, Chris-
guilera, Ryan Gosling and
al bandmate JC Chasez
of these things is not like

Alpern is bringing sexy
back. To help him, e-mail
ealpern@umich.edu.

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