4B - Thursday, March 14, 2013
The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com
4B - Thursday, March 14, 2013 The Michigan Daily - michigandailycom
R
FOOD COLUMN
Famous deli
just isn't worth
the dough
I
-a a a
MARLENE LACASSE/Daily MARLENE LACASSE/Daily
The structure of the classes allows newbies to work alongside seasoned cooks. Most people in the classes are over 30, but students occassionally sign up.
A baking beginner's quest
Zingerman's hosts years ago, the Bakehouse trans-
formed the space next door to a
classes to teach "school" - now complete with
two classrooms specifically des-
cooking cr aft ignated for BAKE! classes, year
By CARLINA DUAN round, five days a week.
Daily Community Culture Editor "In our country, learning how
to bake was a lost art. We thought
Sugar cookies. Walnut brown- one thing we could do for the con-
ies. Slices of chocolate cake munity is actually show people
smattered in rich, bossy frost- how (to bake)," Emberling said,
ing. When it comes to sugar, my "So when you leave (class) you
belly is no stranger. Every night will have confidence and inspira-
at dessert, I evolve into all-cap- tion to try it again at home."
ital-lettered euphoria, fiercely On the morning of my class, I
elbowing my way to the table and lacked confidence. Dry-mouthed,
piling plates to skyscraper height. I drove through aslayer of snow to
Friends can attest: I tweet about reach the Bakehouse, wringing my
sugar; I dream about sugar. The hands with pre-bake anxiety. Iwas
most recently tagged photo of me probably going to make the world's
on Facebook? A slice of velvety floppiest cream puff. In fact, it'd
tiramisu. It shouldn't come as a probably look so monstrous that
surprise, then, that my ultimate folks would dub it the "Ugly Puff."
dream is to open up a bakery Already envisioning failure, I
named Mount Olympus. Each parked the car with dumb spirits.
baked good will be coined after Set in a complex of brick, facto-
a Greek God/Goddess. Zeus will ry-style buildings on Plaza Drive,
be a triple-decker brownie cake, the Bakehouse stands out. Next
drizzled in marshmallows. door, signs in funky fonts and
Only problem with this grand fresh colors beckon you to taste
plan: IShave no idea how to bake. coffee. If you're taking a class,
In fact, I'm famous for kitchen drinks within the Bakehouse
failures. Once, I made macaroni buildingarecomplimentaryAfter
and cheese with Greek yogurt walking next door to the class-
(first mistake: using Greek yogurt) room building, I found myself in a
and rested the heaping bowl onto room with spacious tables, stoves,
the dinner table with proud hands. folded white aprons, baking racks,
My family took small bites with an iPod trumpeting jazz and ...
plastiospoons, swallowing politely elderly couples. Around the table
until my Dad finally spliced the sat a retired pair, Matt and Linda,
silence: "What is this shit?" who revealed their tradition of
Baking classes, then, were just "pie-crust throwing," a ritual
what I needed. And not just any sparked in their youthful, just-
baking class, but a Zingerman's married days. Meanwhile, Cheryl,
BAKE! "Who You Callin'A Cream a woman clad in swirly, candy-
Puff?"class.As a college kid strug- shaped earrings, introduced her-
gling to fling together brownie self as a BAKE! connoisseur who
mix from the box every weekend, had taken dozens of classes. Cher-
I needed to dip my hands into yl was accompanied by her per-
some flour - start familiarizing sonal trainer, Cathy. Both giggled
myself with real, out-of-the-box, as Cathy mock-whispered, "So,
home-cooked food. we can work off the calories after
And Zingerman's, as I'm sure today!"
any foodie will attest to, can be Total class size? Seven stu-
dubbed as real food. The Bake- dents, including me.
house, born in 1992, was the According to Emberling, most
second Zingerman's business to students in BAKE! classes are age
open. Bakehouse Managing Part- 30 and above, and each course is
ner Amy Emberling, who was one capped at 12 students. Class fees
of the original staffers at the time, range from $40Oto $250, with $100
described the original mission of as the average. As a hungry-yet-
the Bakehouse: to supply bread. poor student, I'm not surprised
"We intended to be only a that there aren't more college kids
wholesale bakery and only to here. You'd have to be very pressed
make fantastic bread for (the for baking skill to pay $100 for an
Deli's) sandwiches," she said. apron-clad morning.
At the Bakehouse, public class- Despite the older demographic
es were established even before of my classmates, the energy in
BAKE! classes came along. "We the air was still crisp and young.
would have people in one Sun- Perhaps this has to do with the
day a month, for two hours in the structure of the course. Our
afternoon, and we'd teach them a instructor, Nikki Lohmann, stood
bit about bread making," Ember- at the front of the room, dem-
lingexplained. "There was always onstrating how to separate egg
a waitinglist." yolks, mash dough and cook pas-
As the monthly waiting lists try cream in a saucepan.
continued to grow, the demand "Being a pastry chef is all about
for classes became apparent. Six multitasking," she confided as she
navigated a stirring spoon with
wild, prancing hands. Lohmann
demonstrated stirring technique
for the cream pastry, our first
task. Then, we students dove in.
Across the room, spatulas
clunked. Eggshells crackled. In
front of us lay shiny pots, stir-
ring spoons, pats of butter in wax
paper and Tupperware cups of
sugar, salt, flour, eggs and vanilla
bean. Everything smelled like
butter. Running frantically from
the stove back to my chair with a
saucepan, my muscles trembled.
Cooking equaled exercise. I was
sweating for these cream puffs.
Furtively, ISglanced at my peers,
strainingto peer inside their pans.
Was I falling behind? Was I doing
okay? Could everybody see the
sweat stains draped beneath my
armpits? Cheryl smiled at me and
glanced nonchalantly into my pot.
"Lookin' great!" she enthused as
she whisked her bowl with wiry,
done-this-before flair.
According to Emberling, stu-
dents aren't arranged in class by
baking talent. In fact, newcom-
ers and oldtimers alike are placed
together. This is due to the BAKE!
mission, which focuses on culti-
vating teachable material, rather
than skills.
"What we're trying to do in
each class is teach technique,
and it is the case that everyone
who comes may be at a differ-
ent level, but the basic info you
need to share can be the same,"
Emberling said. "There's often
not advanced knowledge. There's
advanced practice. But the knowl-
edge is the same."
Despite four hours of instruc-
tion, I never felt weary with any
task. In fact, my intimidation
wore off as Lohmann routinely
cycled our tables to check on our
progress. In between the chat-
ter of my peers, the hiss of cream
sauce on the stove and croon of
jazz on the stereo, I fell into rou-
tine. Lohmann demonstrated,
then students tried. The pastry
dough was kneaded, baked and
puffed. The cream was piped -
squeezed through plastic, trian-
gular bags in order to create afros
of lush, swirly cream. Eclairs
were garnished with powdered
sugar. The whipped cream was
whipped.
"Although we want (these
classes) to be full of content, we
want them to also be relaxed,
enjoyable and fun, so it's a safe
learning environment, and not
like the things you see on TV -
not like the scary chef," Ember-
ling noted.
Surprisingly, as the class wore
on, I wasn't sensing an ounce of
Scary Chef from Lohmann, nor
from the other students. True,
I splashed some of the cream
sauce out onto the stove, almost
hitting the baker next to me (she
flinched). And, yes, my cream
puffs were the smallest of the
batch because my arms started
wheezing midway through the
piping process (to be fair, Ihad the
smallest biceps).
But ultimately, I felt pretty
badass.
When our cream puffs were
placed into a take-home box, we
all chuckled. My apron heaved
with egg yolk and vanilla bean
smudge. My face was pummeled
in a permanent hot-stove flush.
But I conquered those puffs.
Like crisp, brown jewels, they
winked inside my box. I chomped
into one, and my teeth sung. Hal-
lelujah, sugar.
For the epilogue of our class,
Lohmann demonstrated how to
make cream puff swans - adorn-
ing their wings with plushy puffs
of cream. What's more, she tout-
ed the versatility of the pastry
dough, proving its multifunction
by teaching - and serving us! -
homemade tomato-and-cream
gnocchi, citrus-glazed donuts,
cinnamon churros and my favor-
ite: cheese puffs that boogied in
my mouth with dollops of Mon-
terey Jack, cheddar, pepper and
buttery groove.
At the Bakehouse, quality ingre-
dients are used not only in the in-
house goods, but also in classes. In
fact, the origins of the ingredients
used in my class - chocolate, vanil-
la bean, eggs - were all explained
with loving passion by Lohmann,
who then gave us tips on where to
find the finest and most affordable
ingredients in Ann Arbor.
BAKE! class Principal Shelby
Kibler added that the recipes
shared in class are also the Bake-
house's very own. "When we
opened the school, it was deliber-
ately to show people how to make
what we make here, so the focus
was taking our recipes at the bak-
ery," he said.
Walking to my snow-encrusted
car, my belly bulged. In my trunk:
an entire Tupperware can of pas-
try cream, another filled with
warm chocolate ganache and,
finally, my babies - my cream
puffs, cradled in their cardboard
cribs.
Driving home, I called my mom
on the phone. "Guess what?" I
hollered, mid-sugar rush. "No
more Pillsbury dough boy for me."
I've been avoiding reviewing
it for a long time - because
everyone loves this place
and I, well, don't. My friends
brag endlessly about the thick-
stacked
sandwiches,
freshly baked
breads,
outrageous
selection
of cheeses_
and desserts
galore. NATHAN
"It's an WOOD
Ann Arbor - -
classic,"
I hear from every University
acquaintance. "You're not just
paying for the sandwich but for
the whole experience."
You guessed it: We're talking
Zingerman's Deli.
Now, before you call blas-
phemy, let me explain myself. I
will concede that Zingerman's
is adored by Ann Arborites and
University alumni the world
round, and that this popularity,
coupled with the restaurant's
history, rightfully dignifies it
as an Ann Arbor classic. The
sandwiches are thoughtfully
crafted, the side dishes sophis-
ticated, the decor cultured and
weird (typical Ann Arbor) and
the business model clever and,
respectable. But as a deli, I just
can't overlook the fact that their
sandwiches simply don't taste
that good.
I mean, I've had much bet-
ter pastrami. Here it's dry - an
unforgivable fault, severely
lacking in salt (Hello, this is
supposed to be brined?), truly
underseasoned and, on the
whole, bland. The expanse sep-
arating the superior pastrami
at Katz's in New York City from
the inferior at Zingerman's Deli
here in Ann Arbor is inarticu-
lately vast. And, as the cherry
on top, Katz's Manhattan deli is
still cheaper.
I've never found the breads
particularly exquisite, either.
Zingerman's "best-selling" Jew-
ish rye is too dense for my taste,
lacking a satisfying texture,
deep color and any unique char-
acter ... save the crusty, grilled
edges, which require at least a
minute of forceful chomping on
before disintegrating into a con-
sistency capable of being swal-
lowed without puncturing your
esophagus. My jaw has gotten
a more facile workout from a
softball-sized jawbreaker (you
know, the kind you break your
teeth on).
Any bread here given a gener-
ic, unrevealing name is simply
that: generic. I'm talking to you,
"farm bread" (overcooked white
bread), "soft buns" (glorified
hot dog buns), "Country Wheat
bread" (let's just call it wheat
bread) and "Bakehouse white
bread" (the extra adjective does
little to distinguish this loaf
from Wonder).
The pickles accompanying
the sandwiches are an atrocity,
too. Why anyone would ever
serve an "old pickle" - yes,
that's what they call it - is
beyond me. They taste just as
their name implies.
But aside from the sandwich-
es and pickles, I must admit that
nearly everything else is really
quite delicious. The spinach feta
salad is simple, light, tangy and
- with a hint of mint - subtly
refreshing. The garlic potato
salad is a modern, tastytake on
the traditional German variety,
and the macaroni and cheese is
OUT. OF. THIS. WORLD. I'm
not exaggerating when I say
that this is literally the best mac
and cheese I've ever had and
probably will ever have. With
a creamy housemade bechamel
sauce, artisanal Tuscan maca-
roni and plenty of Cabot Ver-
mont cheddar and cracked black
peppercorn, a side of this hearty
mac is a must. The sauce is silky,
but not artificially so. The mac-
aroni are cooked perfectly, pro-
viding a decent cohesiveness;
the cheese is strikingly perva-
sive. The crunchy charred bits
of cheese and pasta on top add
depth of texture and flavor, and
the product's mouthcoating is
slippery smooth. I'm impressed
to the highest degree.
Take note, however, that only
one pan of macaroni and cheese
is made each day. The pan rolls
out at 11 a.m., and once it's gone,
it's gone. So get there early.
Skip the
sandwiches,
stick to the
sides.
The next-door dessert shop
boasts a variety of delectable
confectionaries, beautifully dec-
orated cakes and pastries, sweet
espresso drinks and Sicilian-
style gelato made with Michigan
milk at Zingerman's Creamery
down the road. While I don't
find the gelato exceptional, it
does cap off a Zingerman's meal
sweetly and can be just the ticket
on a hot summer's day.
In all fairness, Zingerman's
is an experience. Everyone in
Ann Arbor should dine there a
time or two and be willing to
graciously escort interested out-
of-state guests there when they
come to visit. It's an experience
to stand wrapped around a his-
toric brick building in anticipa-
tion, sampling sides, meats and
cheeses outside the door. It's an
experience to order from the
expansive sandwich menu and
peruse the rare cheeses, expen-
sive oils and aged vinegars. It's
an experience to dine in the
crowded upstairs of the renovat-
ed house or out on the patio, and
it's an experience to sip a creamy,
red birch beer with friends and
family over a relaxed meal. Just
remember that it's actually not
about the $16 sandwiches - as
much as everyone wants you to
think that it is - as they're sim-
ply not extraordinary.
Wood is definitely not eating
at Zingerman's. To fight him,
e-mail nisaacw@umich.edu.
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MARLENE LACASSE/Daily
BAKE! offers over 60 courses throughout the year.