6 - Friday, March 1, 2013 The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com 0 Please don't tell us any more stories. Please. Why Lncoln' lost S "Li Oscar on th third Ap shoe- Produ biopic other Why? Linin Fast and u "Ar ing cc Holly home Scree ing. "I remer ocean anima Noah of toy statue "Li ratific ment, son," it d offer same Flashy trumps eting, edge-of-your-seat mass appeal (the climax consists of ubstance at this men tallying votes ... ). Plus, at almost three hours in length, it year's Oscars requires patience and attention - two characteristics not especially By CARLY KEYES prevalent in the human race. Daily Arts Writer But entertainment factor and runtime have nothing to do with ncoln" got no love from quality. Beethoven's Symphony this year. Well, it gotapeck No. 9 originally spanned more e cheek,"Life of Pi" got to than an hour yet doesn't exactly base and "Argo" got lucky. get the toe tapping like the cur- art from Daniel Day-Lewis's rent four-minute, four-chord pop in victory and a win for Best track, but in a competition of com- ction Design, the beautiful position and aesthetic value, well, went overlooked in every there is no competition. category - 2-for-12 overall. Not that Affleck's "Argo" and The same reason "Silver Lee's "Life of Pi" are catchy pop gs Playbook" went 1-for-8: crap; they're just catchy pop crap and flashy trumped elegant compared to the incomparable nderstated. symphony that is Spielberg's "Lin- -go" is a fast film, a thrill- coln." ombination of the CIA and The master crafter delicately wood and terrorism; it took intertwines intelligent humor Best Picture, Best Adapted without diminishing the gravity nplay and Best Film Edit- of the subject matter and captures Life of Pi" is a flashy picture; the dynamism of Lincoln's charac- mber that scene when the ter - the father, the husband and liner with all of the zoo theleader ofthe free world-while als sank in the storm? Makes making room for the supporting 'sArk look likeatugboat full cast to shine. Anyone who can s. It walked away with four implement tasteful comedy into es, including Best Director. the Civil War eraand find space for ncoln," which recounts the Sally Field and Tommy Lee Jones ation of the 13th Amend- in the Day-Lewis-shaped spotlight screams "history les- deserves some serious hardware. and But apparently the Acad- oesn't emy favors directors who crutch the First seen on around onCGI instead. riv- -the filter The script, developed by Tony Kushner, should've brought home the gold based on Lincoln's inven- tive, endearing anecdotes alone. But the hilarious insults and slanderous statements tossed between politicians as they ban- ter for endless hours in the House of Representatives, the somber exchanges between Lincoln and his wife, Mary, and the fervent speeches given by theall-mighty Commander in Chief during cabi- net meetings offer a wider emo- tional and intellectual spectrum than any other nominee in the category. But apparently the Academy favors brilliant screenwriting like "Argo f*ck yourself" instead. Much more could be said about "Lincoln" and its unjusttreatment at the Academy Awards this year. Maybe if Spielberg had thrown in a dozen purposeless bloody com- bat scenes and cut outa half hour of"boring" material where people "just sit around talking," his film would have gotten the Oscar love it deserves. But Spielberg never would and Spielberg never will. The crew of "Lincoln losers" might not have walked away with Best Picture this past Sunday, but it left with uncompromised creative integ- rity. And, of course, everyone knows it's an honor just to be nominated. - The original version of this article was published on The Filter, the Daily Arts blog, onFeb. 28. Never forget 'Gigli Never forget. Academy fails at re-invention once again By ADITI MISHRA Daily Arts Writer The phrase that springs to mind when thinking about this year's Oscars is: "Trying too hard." To which I'd like to add: "And failing." Getting a lot of people to watch something while staying true to the craft is an arduous task, even for the greatest film directors, let alone an award show. Which is why it's time for the Academy Awards to decide whether they want to be respected or enjoyed because, as Sunday night proved, trying to achieve both is no easy feat. Let's dissect Sunday's show step by step, starting with the host. Needless to say, even at his most classy, Seth MacFar- lane is a prick. But that's what the world expects the creator of "Family Guy" to be; that's why we were so excited about the prospect of him making this show both approachable to "the younger demographic" the Academy so desperately tries to please and exciting in the nerdy-cool way reminiscent of Andy Samberg's contributions to "SNL." But MacFarlane was neither, and his few crude jokes were too tasteless to be memo- rable or funny. After years of trying new things (the disas- trous memory of Anne Hatha- way and James Franco's hosting still lingers ... ), it's clear there can only be two good kinds of Oscar hosts. The most successful hosts to date have been Academy veter- ans, showmen like Steve Martin and Billy Crystal who look out into the audience and see the face of an old friend instead of can't-joke-about-the-legend- himself Robert DeNiro. The other great kind of host is a complete outsider - the Ricky Gervais - who doesn't give a crap about what DeNiro thinks of him, anyway. Which is exact- ly where MacFarlane, who's close enough to the film indus- try to care but not close enough to insult, failed. Perhaps the Oscars need to come to terms with the fact that, with the exception of film buffs, people don't generally care about who wins an Academy Award (we're going to go see "The Avengers" regardless), and that the efforts to make them more approach- able are fundamentally futile. Clearly, choosing a good host wasn't the only thing that befuddled the Academy this year. The show brought talking teddy bears and 1970s musicals together in the most confusing way possible. Boob songs were followed by ballroom danc- ing. The awards themselves were more indecisive and skit- tish than some of MacFar- lane's worst punchlines of the night. Affleck didn't garner a Best Director nomination, but "Argo" won Best Picture; "Life of Pi" wasn't even considered to be a legitimate Best Picture contender, but Ang Lee won Best Director. Even the techni- cal awards were almost evenly divided and distributed among Best Picture nominees so that no one left the room a loser. 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