The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com Wednesday, November 24, 2010 - 5 Aside dish album Palin can't win the cable television vote Minaj shines in guest spots, but doesn't work her magic on 'Pink Friday' By SHARON JACOBS AssistantArtsEditor While every successful Thanks- giving requires a turkey, it's the side dishes that complete our bel- ly-busting holi- *J1 day - mouthfuls of smooth and Nidd Minaj bready stuffing, or Pink Friday a dollop of tangy Universal Moin cranberry sauce. But fill your whole plate with stuffing, and you'll just get sick; it's simply too rich and not at all a balanced meal. On her debut album, Pink Fri- day, bombastic rapper Nicki Minaj proves herself to be the stuffing of popular music. She's spiced up the singles of many an artist lately, helping to raise Jay Sean's "2012" from mediocrity and Kanye West's "Monster" to perfection. But when Minaj is the only thing on the plate, it turns out she's all buttery style and no nutritional substance. Album opener "I'm The Best" has a flavorful start, as Minaj details her road to fame in that strong New York accent that makes her sound like she's talking with her mouth full. Hyperactive synths and a hopping electronic beat push the track forward. For about the first minute of the song, the intriguing echo effect on Minaj's voice distracts her lyr- ics - a string of boring boasts and random references. But it soon becomes clear that the only cre- ative or fresh lines of hers are the borderline offensive ones: "Tell 'em bitches get a stick / I'm done leading the blind," she spits, as we cringe and take note. Cue "Roman's Revenge," a frighteningly intense collabora- tion of alter-egos. Minaj, as the ultra-violent Roman Zolanski, N AJ Man, these 'Toy Story' movies used to be fo dominates by earnestly roaring about other things she is (Aladdin, a bad bitch and a movie, to name a few - don't ask why). Restored to all his disgusting glory, Eminem as Slim Shady peppers the song with lines about S&M and pee. Granted, Minaj can't always take on the sug- ary Harajuku Barbie persona from softer songs and on Pink Friday's cover, but the overdone bitterness of "Roman's" doesn't sit right. Ah, but Minaj is more than just a "bad bitch" - on "Right Thru Me," she finally reveals her sensitive side. For the most part, the lyrics give an effective look into a rela- tionship in which Minaj is always a step behind, and her singing voice, while hoarse, holds the right amount of tired bewilderment. But wedged among the all-too- purposefully bad-ass morsels that make up Pink Friday, it's the rela- tive emotional blandness of "Right Thru Me" that's most noticeable. Changing up the four-note back- ground synth pattern could've made a difference, too. Artistic innovation, though, is not Minaj's thing. Check out F R D A.Y cOURTESY OF UNIVERSAL MOTOWN r kids. "Check It Out," which desperately clings to the introductory "oh-oh" wails of "Video Killed the Radio Star" for some shred of musical legitimacy; her well-duh proclama- tion that "haters, you can kill your- self" isn't helping. Or taste-test the mock-reflective "Here I Am," in which she chants, "I am woman, hear me roar" as if we've never heard of a female rap- per before. Sure, we're still a long way from total gender equality, and not just in the realm of hip hop, but Minaj doesn't seem to understand we've reached a point where the mere fact that she is a woman rap- per isn't special enough to make her a good one. Though Minaj made history last month by hitting the Billboard Top 100 chart with seven simultaneous singles, it's worth noting that six of them were guest spots; only the vaguely Eastern-accented fantasy chillout "Your Love" was actually hers. She's stated in interviews that Pink Friday would show a different side of her - more well rounded or filling, perhaps - but the album is nothing but empty calories. By LINDSAY HURD DailyArts Writer In case you didn't get enough of her cheesy catchphrases about Joe the Plumber and huge prom hair dur- Sarah Pali's ing the 2008 presidential AlaSka elections, don't worry Sundaysat - Sarah 9P.M. Palin is back TLC and ready to win the hearts of every Ameri- can with her new reality show, "Sarah Palin's Alaska." In what Palin likely hopes will aid her political comeback, the former governor takes us inside her family home in Wasil- la, Alaska as well as on trips across the state, doing every- thing from fishing to mountain clirbing. Palin claims the goal of this series is to display the beauty of Alaska to the rest of the coun- try. But clearly, she's trying to show the likeability of her fam- ily. After an unsuccessful run for the vice presidency, endless mockery of her speeches and intelligence, as well as daugh- ters caught up.in scandal after scandal, she obviously feels the need to improve her public image. On the program, Palin overt- ly disciplines her children for things conservative Middle America would deem unbecom- ing of their youth. In a possible attempt to com- pensate for the Bristol issues, Palin punishes her other daugh- ter, Willow, for sneaking a boy into her room. She also tries to play the victim by bashing Joe McGinniss, the author who rented the house next door while he works on an unauthor- ized Palin biography. As an executive producer on the show, Palin tries to depict herself as a "fun" mom. She bakes with her kids and goes on hiking and fishing adventures, all while balancing a "rising" political career. In her mind, she's the mom of the year, capa- ble of anything. But it's hard to not make fun of the stupid crap that comes out of her mouth. In explaining about McGinnis, she had her husband build a 20-foot high fence - asserting, "This is a good example of what we need to do to secure our nation's bor- ders!" These intelligent phrases are exactly what you want to hear from a person with prob- able aspirations of running the nation. In the ultimate Palin moment, she explains that her favorite thing to do in Alaska is to "sit on her cement slab." Not exactly something you want to be describing when you're try- ing to promote the beauty of a state. The only interesting moment comes during a fishing trip when the program suddenly becomes an Animal Planet show, Two grizzly bears get in an epic brawl over their cubs and for a moment of bliss, Palin stops yap- ping. The rest of the time, you're watching her get stuck on a mountain for 30 minutes, yak on about how pretty her state is and listen to her kids talk about her addiction to her BlackBerry, as you wonder how in the world she became a politician. Palin is lucky that Alaska is so beautiful because without it, she wouldn't have anything left for a show. Let this be a warn- ing to any politicians looking to enhance their public image - a TV show is just not the way to do it. Next on Discovery Channel: 'Deadliest Bitch.' Now on iTunes, the Beatles prove eternal By ELLIOT ALPERN rated," which is itself a testament year brings a new meaning to the For theDaily to their success. For a decade, the song, a different yesterday to miss Beatles ruled the airwaves, and and daydream about. The Beatles On Nov. 16, Apple finally their reign has still not completely age like fine scotch and accumulate announced what many had been diminished. respect like bank interest. Citing anticipating for a long time: the While most bands fade as time the Beatles as an influence is a cop- Beatles had arrived at the iTunes goes by, the Beatles seem to sur- out now. It's understood that they music store. This was apparently vive on an entirely different plane. changed music entirely. big news. It spawned commercials As the years go by, the music gets Perhaps the greatest thing about and news articles that all seemed deeper, more meaningful and more the Fab Four is their range, both to lead to the same reaction: Who evocative of the times. The songs emotionally and musically. The A finished 'Body' of work By CHLOE STACHOWIAK For the Daily With the release of her third and final album of 2010, Swed- ish artist Robyn is back with the same beats and energy that *** have already carried her to Robyn the top of Scan-B dinavian pop BodyTalk charts this year. Konichiwa The musical spawn of a fresh-voiced Madon- na and a house-music DJ, Body Talk blends moods, sounds and, yes, even songs from the other two parts of the series. In fact, only one-third of Body Talk is actually new to the music world. The other 10 songs have been plucked from the older phases of the Body Talk series in order to, in her own words, "cre- ate a turbo version of the Body Talk album." For an album seething with rapid pop ballads, techno beats and robot references, "turbo" is an accurate descriptor. This could be a fast-paced soundtrack to both a dance club and an Aber- crombie & Fitch store. In all 15 songs, the artist's energy never dies down. The work mixes up the sound with both sugary pop and heavier techno elements, resulting in a catchy and diverse album. The opening song "Fembot" perhaps best exemplifies this musical blend. While the first lines of the track are almost irri- tatingly pop-infused, bordering on the sound of a playground clapping game, the song takes a dynamic turn almost instant- ly. The light, overly melodic vocals continue throughout the song and are matched with a low, quick bass line, creating a pleasant balance between the two extremes. The robot-relat- ed sexual innuendos juxtapose with the fluffy sound of the vocals. It's hard to ignore the "automatic booty application" Robyn rounds out her 2010 robotic, musical love-fest. references and persistent moan- ing that drones in the back- ground. The mood of the second song takes a direct turn away from the first. "Don't Fucking Tell Me What to Do" lacks the over- See ROBYN, Page 6 actually cares? The Beatles have been around since the '60s. Why does it matter that a single band is added to the otherwise bottom- less pit of music that is the iTunes store in a world with so many other avenues for acquiring music? Well, it does matter. In fact, it matters a lot. Any expansive music collection without the Beatles is incomplete, a farce. It's akin to the Louvre minus the Mona Lisa - a travesty of art. The Beatles are among the best-known bands in history; this is almost indisput- able. But, unlike the other well known bands in history (and any other band for that matter), they are almost universally liked, or at least tolerated. Think about it: The biggest piece of criticism directed at the Beatles is that they are "over- weren't made to stay put in the '60s A collection without the Beatles is no collection at all. - they transcend decades and eras. "Revolution" may have been a Viet- namWar protest song at one point, but it still applies for the wars of today and will likely continue to be relevant unless its lyrics come to fruition. "Yesterday" is an instru- ment for melancholy on the same scale as family photo albums. Each early Beatles (of the "She Loves You" era) are happy and optimis- tic. The songs are undaunted by the complications of love, but maintain that innocent, youthful enthusiasm that catches many the unwary lis- tener in their snares. As they pro- gressed, so did their variety. "A Day in the Life" does a little bit of everything - at times it's eerie and haunting, and the buildups provide tension like a runaway train. How- ever, when Paul sings, it feels like everything's going to be just fine. The chorus of "Hey Jude" can dou- ble as an anthem to sing at the top of your lungs, the verses of "Let It Be" can substitute as a eulogy. Find an important, defining moment in life - there's a Beatles song for it. Paul put the idea of love at first See BEATLES, Page 6 'Akonic' won't be iconic By ARIELLE SPECINER DailyArts Writer Akon, the Konvict turned Akonic singer, is back. on his latest album, Akon brings a new dance-house feel to his typi- cally tropical ways. Techno Akon beats and R&B Akonic sounds spice Islatd up his fourth effort, which encompasses all the sounds he could possibly produce. The pop singer supreme drops top-40 hits with soulful R&B vocals, club-shaking beats and poppy hooks like it's his job - well, it is his job. It's been a few years since the pop-master last put out an album. Between collaborations with Lady Gagaand Lil Wayne and producing records with his self-run record company, he clearly just hasn't had the time. N9w, the "Smack That" singer emerges with the dance tracks (and probably the dance moves) to pull him out of his hiatus. "Angel," the first single off Akonic, has a quintessential Akon sound. It starts with a whiny, call-out entrance as the beat flows in. Reminiscent of the Black Eyed Peas' "I've Got a Feeling," this track is a party starter - dance pop at it's fin- est. Still, while the hook grabs attention, the song itself just doesn't. Sure, it's a top-40 gem, but musically, it doesn't do any- thing exciting enough to earn any credibility. And Akon's semi-irritating voice does not help Akonic's cause. It is dif- ficult to sit through an Akon album without developing a headache. While the album as a whole can be somewhat annoying, the beats and rhythms hold it together. The reggae grooving "Dirty Situation" sees Akon collaborating with Mohombi to create a Jamaican- infused track that lays down the right rhythms but not the rhymesy Akon sings, "Danger in the disco / She drop it low / Back it up / Mami's on the floor / Shakin' that booty / Oh yeah." Clearly, Akonic was not meant to be the most poetic album, but it will definitely get some heads bobbing. Akonic is a good' example of a techno-tropics dance album, yet it's missing some substance. Top-40 gems, nothing new. Though the album includes guest appearances by some big-hitters in the hip-hop world, the album is forgettable. Impressive dance beats drive Akonic, but it isn't enough for the Senegalese rapper to pull through. Don't fret Akon fans, you will hear his tunes top- ping the charts soon enough, because he does what he's good at - making pop hits that make your hips swing. The Beatles wilnever be as good as they werewhen Stuart Sutcliffe was in th* band.