The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com

Friday, October 8, 2010 - 5A

The Michigan Daily - michigandailycomFriday, October 8, 2010 - 5A

DUELING
COLUMNS,
In the week leading up to the Michigan-Michigan State football
game each year,football writers from the Daily and the student
newspaper at Michigan State exchange columns. As both 5-0
teams prepare to clash in Ann Arbor, here's this year's installment:

The Michigan Daily's Ryan Kartje:

The State News's Jeremy Warnemuende:

y sister was never one for
common sense. We've
been telling her this for
years.
Despite this, she had always told me
she wanted to follow in my footsteps
and go to one of the finest schools,
athletically and
academically,
in the country.
A place where
couches remain.
untorched and
blondes remain
unbleached. I held
out hope for her.
So you can RYAN
imagine my KARTJE
disappointment
when she decided
to go back on that promise, give up
any remaining common sense or job
prospects, and apply to Michigan
State.
But there's still time to save her.
There's still time to consider other
paths of education. Trade school,
perhaps? A healthy apprenticeship
with the local garbage man, maybe?
Either would lead to a more respect-
able job, post-graduation.
So I leave this to you sis, my last
plea to get you back to your senses
and to keep you where you belong:
Ann Arbor. Remember, you're
already my little sister, you don't
need to be my little brother too.
Dear little sister,
You know I care about you. That's
why I'm doing this. But just so you
get a picture of what life would be
like in East Lansing, let me describe
how that first year would go.
First off, chances are you'll end up
in one of Michigan State's fine dor-
mitory establishments - just a hop,
skip, a jump and a 30-minute walk
from everything else on campus.
Once you get settled in that night,
make sure you take a trip down East

Grand River to stop in at Gumby's for
its famous late-nightpizza - a place
where Michigan State students crave
"pokey stix" because garlic knots are
too complicated.
I know you gethomesick, but don't
worry: they do all they can to make
you feel welcome in that first week.
Maybe you'll play some icebreak-
ers with your R.A. and your hall. Or
maybe, you guys could go out and get
ice cream. Maybe the football team
will even take time out of their night
and bring in the welcome wagon like
they did for the new kids at Rather
Hall last year by wearing ski masks
and beatingthe tar outof you and
your freshman friends.
Once you make it to the weekend,
that first Saturday should be some-
thing you never forget: your first
gameday asa college student. Now, I
know you've only been to gamedays
in Ann Arbor, soI made you a list of
ways to fit in when you make your
way into Spartan Stadium:
1. Don't show your disappoint-
ment when you realize the stadium
has almost 40,000 fewer seats than
you're used to. I hear the upper level
really isn't that bad, especially with
binoculars.
2. I know you love to sing, so make
sure to read up onthe Michigan State
fight song. Once you getoverthe fact
that it has nine more lines to remem-
ber than the gold standard at Michi-
gan and that most of the lyrics don't
rhyme, it shouldn't be too hard.
3. If you ever starttalking football
with another student, remember
your facts: State has won six Big Ten
titles, just one fewer than the Univer-
sity of Chicago (which left the con-
ference and Division Iin 1946). You
have zero Heisman Trophy winners
and a grand total of two Pro Football
Hall of Famers to Michigan's three
and eight, respectively. And the
greatest triumph in the history of
State football was delivered by Appa-

lachian State in 2007. That lastone's
important, make sure to harp on it as
much as possible.
4. Lastly, make sure you ignore the
fact thatcyou've seen probably half the
offense on either an episode of Date-
line or re-runs of The Longest Yard.
Remember, Sparty deserves second,
third and fourth chances, too.
If this sounds at all appealing,
then Iguess I can't do anythingto
stop you. You being a little sibling,
I understand that you would do
anything in your power to step out
of your successful older brother's
shadow. And maybe you would enjoy
events like "Tie your shoes like Kirk
Cousins" Day, where everyone pre-
tends they don't know how cool it
is that Denard Robinson runs with
untied shoes.
And would you look at that? I
spent a whole 700 words without
even discussing the greatest player in
college football - a Wolverine who
will probably run for a touchdown
before the Michigan State band
makes it through the fight song once
on Saturday.
I know, I know, what if Denard
gets hurt? Michigan State will, after
all, focus their entire gameplan on
stopping him and only him. But I
worry less about Denard and more
aboutthe Spartan linebackers, who
probably can'tpronounce half the
words used to hyperbolize Michi-
gan's quarterback.
So think it over on Saturday after
Michigan, with next-to-no second-
ary, an injured running back and a
seemingly absent defensive coordina-
tor still beats Michigan State with
one player and a pair of untied shoes.
Then, let me know.
Signed,
Your BigBrother
-Ryan Kartje is the Daily's
managing sports editor. He can be
reached at rkartje@umich.edu

re you ready to admit it
I know it's tough for
you self-righteous and even more
self-conscious Michigan faithful
to confess to any sign of inferior-
ity. But if someone already hasn't
done it for
you, I'll
be the one
to let you
know:
It's over.4
It's been
1,069 days
and count- _._.
ing since JEREMY
the last WARNEMUENDE
time the -
Wolverines
have topped the Spartans - in
football or men's basketball
- and it's official your time as
self-proclaimed big brother has
run out.
I remember standing in the
Michigan student section in
2008, singing the "Michigan
State Fight Song" with the thou-
sands of other MSU students and
fans who invaded your sacred
hole in the ground to watch
a 35-21 Spartans' win. I also
remember whenever the eyesores
known as U-M students made
their incredibly predictable and
dim-witted attempts to mock my
education, it easily was overpow-
ered by chants of, "Go Green. Go
White."
The high concentration of
green and white in the crowd
that day was no coincidence.
MSU fans proudly packed
into the Big House for a reason,
knowing the game was going to
be the beginning of a new era.
So far, so good.
The two straight wins speak
for themselves, but the actions
off the field can be telling as well.

Big-time recruits now are
flocking to East Lansing, while
players already committed to
U-M are running away from Rich
Rodriguez like little kids fleeing
from a strange man handing out
candy in his big, white van.
All of your fans, Wolverines
or otherwise, also have indicated
how the rivalry has changed. It
eats you up inside to know MSU
is taking ownership of the annual
matchup.
You claim this hardly is a
rivalry and the game means
nothing. MSU is just another
team on the schedule.
That must be why you're buy-
ing up T-shirts that read, "The
Big Game at the Big House,"
and hypingtomorrow's game
like your season depends on the
result.
You're lying if you say it
doesn'tbother you that two years
after the lastgame at the Big
House, the Paul Bunyan Trophy
remains in East Lansing.
Sorry to break it to you, but he
has no intentions of leaving.
You tried to snatch him away
last year.
Quarterback Tate Forcier, then
the Heisman front-runner and
only known hobbit in the U.S.,
led the undefeated Wolverines
into Spartan Stadium.
The little guy kept it close for
a while, even managing to force
overtime. In the end, though, it
was kind of like when you play
basketball against your little
brother and you let him hang
around for a little while before -
well, you getthe point.
Michigan once again brings an
undefeated record into this year's
game and has a new Heisman .
favorite lining up behind center.
Perfect.
The only thing better than

beating a Wolverine when he's
down is knocking him off his
high horse - a position you all
love whether it's deserved or not.
So when Denard Robinson -
built more for the WNBA than
college football - takes the field
against MSU, don't expect any
of the Spartans to be worried.
Instead, real Big Ten footballplay-
ers, such as senior linebacker Greg
Jones, who hasn't had a chanceto
hit someone Robinson's size since
his freshman year of high school,
will be salivating at the opportu-
nity in front of him.
Everyone is talking about
what Robinson has done to the
likes of Indiana and Notre Dame
- teams with defenses so good
they've almost cracked the top 85
in the country.
But much like last season, the
hype won't matter.
And like two years ago, neither
will any home-field advantage.
Not after the additions to the Big
House did nothing more than
create extra room for green-and-
white-clad fans to embarrass the
U-M crowd, sitting on its hands
as MSU destroys a defense even
Robinson would feel bad for
abusing.
Looking at what I've said and
thinking about it more, I know
nothing I can say will help you
acceptthe fact the Spartans are
taking over a rivalry you care
about more than you'll ever
admit. As the most delusional fan
base in the country, you just don't
have it in you.
However, maybe, after MSU
extends the winning streak to
1,070 days tomorrow, you'll start
to get the point.
-Jeremy Warnemuende is a State
News sports reporter. He can be
reached at warnemu3@msu.edu.

Wolverines open CCHA play
* as Berenson goes for 700 wins

By STEPHEN J. NESBITT
Daily Sports Writer
When the Michigan ice hockey
team last took the ice against Bowl-
ing Green on Feb. 9, 2010, a 4-0 vic-
tory moved Michigan coach Red
Berenson into the
sixth slot on col-
lege hockey's all- Mkhigan
time win list. at BlOWing
This weekend,
Berenson has Gen
another opportu- Matchup:
nity to make his- BGSU 0-0;
tory against the Michigan
Falcons. 001
V Stuck at 699 When:
wins for the Tonight, 7 P.M.
last six months, Where: Bowl-
he could have ing Green
achieved the elu- Ice Arena
sive milestone
win in the season opener, but after
a 4-4 tie to Mercyhurst and a mean-
ingless 4-2 exhibition win against
Western Ontario, Berenson and the
fourth-ranked Wolverines are tak-
ing their quest for the 700th win on
the road Friday and Saturday night
in Bowling Green.
But chasing the landmark vic-
tory has been a goal for the entire
team recently, not just the head
coach.
"I don't think (Berenson) really

cares too much about himself - he after the Falcons scored three more
just wants this program to win, and power play goals in their first exhi-
that's why he's been so successful," bition game lastweek.
senior forward Louie Caporusso "Our discipline and penalty kill-
said Thursday. "But the big thing ing will have to be rock solid, and
is that we want to get that win for then we're going to have to be good
him. defensively," Berenson said. "We
"He's done a lot for us, and a lot can't be happy with the way we've
for this program." finished the last two games, get-
Although the Falcons had a dis- ting outscored in the third period.
mal 5-25-6 record last year, they We're going into their rink, and we
have a new head coach and the have take care of business."
majority of their roster returning, Michigan will continue flip-flop-
including leading scorer Jordan ping its senior goaltenders, with
Samuels-Thomas and goaltender Shawn Hunwick getting the start
Nick Eno. on Friday and Bryan Hogan the fol-
Don't expect the Wolverines lowing evening.
(0-0-1) to take this CCHA opener Even with a career milestone
for granted. hanging in the balance, Berenson
"We want to start the season off emphasizes that the getting off to
on the right foot, but at the same a quick start against an improved
time, we've got to approach Bowl- Bowling Green team is his primary
ing Green with a little bit of con- motivation headed into this week-
cern," Caporusso said. "They are a end.
pesky bunch that can cause some "There is pressure on both
trouble for us." teams," Berenson said. "We've got
After all, when the Falcons vis- to go in there and try to play the
ited Yost Ice Arena for their first role of a spoiler on the road. It will
matchup last season, Bowling be a good test for our team.
Green took advantage of several "It's a fine line, as you saw last
late penalties and scored three week, if one or two pucks would
power play goals in less than two- have gone in, or one didn't go in,
and-a-half minutes to win, 4-2. it was different score on Saturday
Special teams have been the (against Western Ontario). It's
major focus for Michigan during its a game of inches, so we've got to
first week of practice - especially take care of those inches."

Michigan coach Red Berenson is entering his 27th year as coach for the Wolverines.

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