2B - Thursday, April 1, 2010 The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com 2B - Thursday, April 1, 2010 The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com Singing in the bus FOOL WARS WENDY'S PANDA EXPRESS 0 Nothing quenches your thirst quite like the water at Wendy's. Served in a colorful cup with plentiful ice, the water is the essence of wetness, and that wet- ness is the essence of quenching that epic, fry-induced thirst. It may not be up to merman standards, but for the aver- age freshwater fish, it would make a more than suitable habitat. WATER PIZZA HUT We brought a crowd of unsuspecting patrons into Palio's with the promise of fine Italian water. But what they didn't realize was that the chef didn't do any- thing that night! Pizza Hut delivered all the waters, and no one could tell the dif- ference. Someone flipped over a table in excitement. There were riots. All around, a terrible idea. When eating pandas, you're going to want to wash it down with the delicious water from Panda Express. The wonder- ful Panda employees even let you serve yourself, allowing you to construct the perfect ice-to-water ratio that meets your preferences. Thanks to the water, never before has an endangered species tasted so good. SUBWAY The true quality of Subway's water shall remain a mystery forevermore. This Daily investigator, upon asking for a cup of cool, sweet water, was directed to Pizza Hut instead. The kicker? There totally is a water tab on Subway's foun- tain drinks dispenser. They just won't give you the cup. What the hell, Subway? Major fail. 0 You've heard him sing, now listen to his story. The Michigan Daily delves into MAR ssAMcCLAIN/nauy the story behind the legend of the singing bus driver. See this multimedia piece on MichiganDaily.com. Weekend Freebies Because boredom doesn't end when your cash flow does Thursday, April 1 Hannah Tinti Fictian Reading Wonderful literature, to free! 3222 Angel! Hall, 5 p.m. - ' Campus Philharmonia Orchestra Classical music from Dvorak to. Brahms, fo free! E.V. Moore Building, 8 p.m. Friday, April 2 Food is Fuel Healthy eating advice, fofrel University Hospitals, 12 p.m. Junior Recital: Nathaniel May Piano music, and a song aot Sudoku, to freel \ \ Stearns Building, 8p.m., Saturday, April 3 Baroque Chamber Ensemble Exactly what it sounds like, but with the bonus of being fo freel E.V. Moore Building, 8 p.m. WHAT'S NEW ON THE DAILY ARTS BLOG * A look back at Wale: Check set our photo slideshow of Wale, Clipse and The Big Sean grac- ing the Power Center with beats. Revel in the memory of the one good thing MSA did this year. . Linking Kevin Bacon to Jesus with the Internet: In this week's diversion, see if you can get from the most random-ass Wikipedia entry to Jesus in six steps or less. Bonus points if you start with a stub. * Horny Jews in a book: The book of this week, Philip Roth's "Goodbye, Columbus" tells the tale of a young chosen person's sexcapades in a pool. Isn't that how everyone celebrates Passover? AND THE WINNER IS: NOT SUBWAY Justin Bieber: the next John Lennon 'My World 2.0' is the greatest album since sliced bread By JASMINE ZHU Daily Arts Writer Awwww yeah, J-Biebs. Get it, boy. GET ITTT. 1994 was a good time tobe alive. Grunge saturated the New York scene. NAFTA ***** was estab- lished. Justin Bieber And Jus- tin Bieber MYWorld 2.0 was born. Island The musi- cal messiah and Usher protegd known as Justin Drew Bieber was given to the world in March 1, 1994. I am not drunk. Lil' JB became an internet sensation via YouTube in 2007. Scooter Braun, a former market- ing executive for So So Def, was essentially like, "dayum boi," and then Bieber's career took off like whoa. And then he began shop- ping at American Apparel. JB has an affinity for wearing Am Appy cardigans in size XXS. This is his signature style, and what makes all the young fly honeys love him so. Also his hair. His hair is volu- minously luscious and probably wonderful to run through with reverent fingers, but we must remember he is only 15. Anyway. His album. My World 2.0 is really good. Better than My World, even. Holistically, the album feels more life-affirming, with power-pop dance jams but also really sad stuff, too. Bieber's voice is beautiful like the sound of angels softly crying in falsetto after a thunderstorm. Although one might think Canada and R&B 0 cOURTESY OF ISLAND "I'm on a bike, motherfuckers. Don't you ever forget!" music are mutually exclusive, Bieber's genius allows him to com- bine his Canadian heritage with soulful R&B sounds. By the way, there is a website called Lesbi- ans Who Look Like Justin Bieber, which is a tribute to Bieber's abil- ity to reach out across all demo- graphics. Canadians, R&B people, lesbians. Also many more. The star-studded album fea- tures R&B heavyweights like Sean Kingston and Ludacris. This helps Bieber establish street cred, which is often difficult for small children. His features are cheru- bic, and he has pillowy lips. But listeners must not get too carried away, because ... well, I'm getting carried away. Distorted vocals, accompanied by urgent reverb-drenched gui- tars and a heavy dash of synth and dubstep rhythm, are not found on this album. This album is much better than that. The best song on My World 2.0, though all of them are perfect, is lead single "Baby," which features Ludacris. The music video is sick, or ill, which means it's very, very good. It fea- tures JB wooing a preteen in the bowling alley, which is a popular location to find young love. Teen dream. J-Nasty is a young rising star for sure. His youthful vibrancy is very appealing. He is a beacon of hope for music. Long live Justin Bieber. 6 The Michigan Daily Advertising Design Department is hiring a Layout Designer. Applicants should have a knack for spacial relationships and a distinct attention to detail. Experience with Adobe InDesign is a plus. Begin this summer and work a couple hours every weekday. 0 0 Think Summer, Think Fordham! * Day/evening classes at two New York City campuses * Credits transfE Competitive tuition rates " Comprehensive course selection r easily t t