" " "0 ..3 S. " " - " " THE EDITOR'S NOTEBOOK withJESSICA VOSGERCHIAN A look at the big news events this week and how important they really are. Conveniently rated from one to 10. Magazine Editor: Jessica Vosgerchian Editor in Chieft Gary Graca ManagingEditor: Courtney Ratkowiak Photo Editor: Sam Wolson The Junk Drawer: Brian Tengel Center spread design: Corey Defever Cover photo: Sam Wolson The Statement is The Michigan Daily's news magazine, distributed every Wednesday during the academic year. new rules rule 233: You can only turn your nose up at cheap beer if you haven't been stu- pid drunk in the past semester. rule 234: It's OK to hate Christmas music. And Santa Claus. And super crowded mall parking lots, rule 235: No, Spanish 232 doesn't count for the Race and Ethnicity require- ment - even if you did take a themed cultural section. - E-mail rule submissions to TheStatement@umich.edu I 1 THE COMCAST EMPIRE Comcast, whose commercials and customer service have made it the cable com- pany everyone loves to hate, announced that it would acquire a majority stake in NBC Universal in a $30 billion deal. The deal, which has become the latest example of massive media consolidation, has raised the hackles of consumer protection groups who fear the cable giant could use its newfound power to force industry- wide price increases, among other nefarious designs. Also worried is struggling talk-show host Jay Leno, who risks being replaced by one of those Slowsky turtles. "THE FAMILY" VALUES IN UGANDA Gay Ugandans would face life imprisonment and, in some cases, the death penalty under a bill being debated in the east African country. Ugandan legislators took up the proposal following a conference in Kampala that featured three American evangelical Christian activists. The bill's sponsor, David Bahati, has close ties to the fundamentalist group "The Family," best known for offering counsel to GOP adulterers like Sen. John Ensign and South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford. The bright side: Maybe Ensign and Sanford will move to Uganda, where their marriages would surely be stronger without all those gays running around and forming committed relationships in the open. HUFF PO BLOWS ONE The Huffington Post got itself into a sticky situation Monday when it ran a story on a poster warning against shower masturbation that was found in a University dorm bathroom. The sign called self-pleasuring in the showers a "University of Michigan Honor Code Violation," citing the costs of clearing semen from pipes that aren't meant to handle it. The only problem: The poster is a hoax, one that has popped up occasionally in dorm bathrooms here for years. The Huffington Post corrected their story yesterday, but the embarassment of running a masturbation false alarm will take a long time to clear from their content pipeline. FOLLOW THE DAILY ON FACEBOOK. f1 i a al P R E S E N T S tI '.. e. A za THURSDAY, DEC. 3 - You don't really think about your news-consumption rou- tine until you're forced to change it. Nor- mally, I would walk to class listening to the five minute NPR news podcast. instead, I listened to Bill O'Reilly's brief "Talking Points" podcast, in which he gives his take on a particular news item. Thursday's topic was the President's jobs summit. O'Reilly called for a complete government spend- ing freeze - advice apparently reserved for Democratic presidents. To be honest, I had wanted to listen to the true king of conservative talk radio, Rush Limbaugh, but conservative pundits are apparently operating on a different business model than their liberal counter- parts (big surprise). I get full TV episodes of "Countdown", "The Rachel Maddow Show" and the NPR audio podcasts for free every day. Limbaugh, on the other hand, charges a minimum of $6.95 a month (or $57.90 for FRIDAY, DEC. 4t-sI clicked around the Drudge Report this morning beforeI got out of bed, and discovered that Gate- Crasher-Gate wasn't discovered by the Secret Service until the next day via Face- book. What?! Besides that stunning revelation, I read more about Climategate, which apparently wouldn't have been more than a blip on my radar if I had been perusing my nor- mal sources. According to Drudge Report, Friday was the 14th straight day that ABC, NBC and CBS all neglected to report the "huge Climategate story" during their weekday news programs. After every- thing I've had to read about Climategate, it actually leaves me shocked that none of the major news networks have covered it. Does this mean I've been persuaded by Fox and Drudge, or have I been manipulated into thinking this is a real story when my regular news sources apparently deemed it SATURDAY, DEC. 5 - In the WSJ edi- torial, "No Way, No How, to the Public Option," Kimberley Strassel portrayed Sen. Joe Lieberman (Conn.) as the last defense standing between our country and the year) for access to something called the Rush 24/7 Club, which includes his podcast. No wonder Republicans have lost touch with nation's youth. I can listen to a pletho- ra of "liberal" sources for no cost. How can Republicans expect to effectively dissemi- nate their message if they start by restrict- ing access to it? Later, while cringing through an hour of "Glen Beck," I learned about a scandal involving a number of scientists that is being referred to as "Climategate." Between this and "Gate-Crasher-Gate" - concerning the White House party crashers - I've decided Watergate was the worst thing to happen to the media in the history of suffixes. 1. Withdrawal from Afghanistan 2. 90bama's unemployment summit 3. Climategate insignificant? Coming home from class, I gazed long- ingly at that lovely blue bag containing the New York Times on my porch before settling down with a borrowed copy of the Wall Street Journal. WSJ economics reporter Jon Hilsenrath debated the role of the central bank in the United States. I had always assumed that the salient debate was over the role of government concern- ing oversight or bailouts, but never in its fundamental right to act in the market- sphere at all. But for the second time in as many days, I encountered someone argu- ing against allowing the Fed to set interest rates or regulate banks. 1. Climategate 2. Bernanke's reconfirmation 3. Dubai's bankruptcy "another entitlement program." But I agree with my normal media sources on this one. Lieberman is less savior, more Judas. He is not valiantly standing up for the position of See THE LIBERAL, Page 8B CAN CHANGING THE--CHANNEL. CHANGE MINDS? WHAT WOULD HAPPEN if a liberal and a conservative traded news media for a few days? Liberal Sam Wainwright and Libertarian Sam van Kleef did just that, ignoring news for half a week and then submerging themselves in enemy S content for the other half. The result? Insight into the bias of U.S. news outlets. BY SAM WAINWRIGHT AND SAM VAN KLEEF THURSDAY, DEC. 3 - Ignoring the book- marked Drudge Report tab on my browser, I was instead confronted with three mas- sive pictures of Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke on the Huffington Post web- site that accompanied astory onBernanke's reconfirmation hearing. I read through some of the headlines and watched a clip of Jon Stewart's "The Daily Show" on the Climategate situation, which garnered mainly angry rebuttals in the comment sec- tion. A New York Times editorial on Presi- dent Obama's job summit contained absurd claims that flew in the face of anyone who has taken even the most basic economics class - for example, the idea that unem- ploymentbenefits help create jobs. "Countdown" with Keith Olbermann was the linchpin of liberal propaganda for the day. Olbermann's most annoying part was his very childish impersonations in his "World's Worst Persons" segment. Finally, I got in a good laugh when Olber- mann accused the morning newscast "Fox & Friends" for taking the Climategate FRIDAY,DEC.4- FirstcthingFridaymorn- ing, I turned to Huffington Post and the Times editorial page. Interestingly, both left and right seemed to agree on the poor han- dling of the biggest current news issue, war in Afghanistan. But Gail Collins of the Times was apparently worried to death about a few hundred million dollars in cuts in a $1.2 tril- lion healthcare bill. She did, however, make the astute remark that Republicans are only fiscal conservatives when not in power. On "Countdown," Adrianna Huffing- ton's acknowledgement that hard times are ahead for the Democrats in 2010 didn't go down well with Olbermann, who tried to steer the conversation toward discussing the right-wing fringe. Childish tea-bagger references are still thrown around. Liberal hypocrisy on "Countdown" abounded as usual, with the "birthers" rightfully blasted SATURDAY, DEC.5 - On the morning of day three, I felt some slight withdrawal, as I again had to ignore my bookmarked tabs and go straight to the Huffington Post and "Daily Show" clip out of context. He should have called the Huffington Post first, since the full Daily Show segment was on the site and showed that Fox & Friends were cor- rect in saying Stewart had blasted Al Gore and the climate scientists. So far, three differences have already become apparent between conservative and liberal media. First, all the headlines are much larger in liberal websites - the big- gest font size on right-wing websites is 28, but the left seems obsessed with headlin- ing its propaganda in size 36 or above. The second difference lies in the liberal media's tendency to employ humor in delivering the news. That probably helps compensate for the third difference, which is the intensity of the anger and hatred expressed in reader comments. 1. Obana's unemnploymentsummit 2The Bernanke hearing 3. Climategate on "The Daily Show" even though the show never made an issue of crazy liberals like the "9/11truthers." One of the main differences I realized Friday between the left- and right-wing news and opinion programs was in the types of people interviewed. It seems the majority of guests on right-wing programs are much more sig- nificant individuals, like senators, others in Congress, PAC heads or CEOs. On the other hand, the left mostly features people whose credibility seems only tobe founded on their opinions (writers, columnists, etc.) as well as a small pool of (former) political Democrats. 1. Afghanistan 2. Healthcare 3. Tiger Woods the Times. I also listened to the podcast of "Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me" on NPR, and was See THE CONSERVATIVE, Page 8B ,c 23 23 G ^ s+ _, x GJ n Af bor "o c_. tlt lx r. S , : :,< SICK OF THE DORMS? CAN'T FIND A PLACE TO LIVE? Visit michigandaily.com/classifieds to see all of the great houses and apartments Ann Arbor has to offer on a convenient map! Also be sure to check out the Classified Pages for other great properties.