4 4A - Thursday, September 17, 2009 The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com I I e WIC46gan wily a Edited and managed by students at the University of Michigan since 1890. 420 Maynard St. Ann Arbor, MI 48109 tothedaily@umich.edu GARY GRACA ROBERT SOAVE COURTNEY RATKOWIAK EDITOR IN CHIEF EDITORIAL PAGE EDITOR MANAGING EDITOR Unsigned editorials reflect the official position oftthe Daily's editorial board. All other signed articles and illustrations represent solely the views ofttheir authors. Txt u 8er State should make texting and driving a secondary offense Few would disagree that drunk driving is extremely dan- gerous for both the drunk driver and any surrounding cars on the road. But while driving under the influence is a punishable offense, another activity that can be just as danger- ous has long been regarded as totally acceptable. That activity is texting. A bill to ban texting while on the road is currently making its way through Michigan's House of Representatives. This bill could be worthwhile, but if the state legislature really wants to curb texting it will be wary of passing a law that broadly empowers law enforcement and instead concentrate on a media campaign instructing drivers not to text. If State Rep. Lee Gonzales's (D-Flint) might have been holding as a phone. This bill becomes law, Michigan would be the should not be left up to the officer's discre- 19th state to pass legislation that bans tion. The best law would be one that pun- concurrent texting and driving. The bill ishes texters who are speeding or driving initially called for texting while driving to erratically by giving them an extra fine or be a secondary offense. But since then, the points. bill has been changed to treat it as a pri- But rather than counting on stricter laws mary offense, meaning that a police officer to curb the problem of texting while driv- doesn't need a separate reason to pull over ing, state agencies should enact a state- a driver who is texting. wide media campaign that highlights the It's good that the legislature has finally dangers and publicizes the new law. Ulti- taken up this debate. A National Highway mately, it will be the perceived threat of Traffic Safety Administration study found punishment rather than the actual severity that drivers using a cell phone are four of the punishment that reduces how much times more likely to cause an accident. The texting people in the state are doing while same study cited cell phone drivers as just driving. Just like the state police's highly as likely to cause accidents as drivers with publicized "Click It or Ticket" program to a .08 blood alcohol content level (the mini- emphasize the need for seatbelts, spread- mum BAC for a DUI). And texting is cer- ing awareness is the real key to addressing tainly more dangerous than just talking on the texting issue. the phone because it requires a person to Establishing concurrent texting and actually look at the phone while driving. driving as a secondary offense - and Though the legislature should act on launching an accompanying publicity pro- this issue, it would be wise to reconsider gram - is a good way to make Michigan's the initial bill. Classifying texting as a pri- roads safer. And who knows, the quality mary offense gives police too much leeway of texts might end up-improving now that to pull over drivers who may be driving in people will have to pull over to text, they a safe manner while simply on the phone might actually have the time and patience or to purposely construe anything a driver not to omit the vowels. I wouldn't say today with absolute certainty that you could get to 60, but it would be just as foolish to say you can't get there either..This is the Senate.' - Sen. Chris Dodd (D-Connecticut), discussing whether Democrats in the Senate could overcome a filibuster on the health care bill, as reported yesterday by the New York Times. Over-glamorizing gays I When it hit theaters this sum- mer, "Bruno" got the gay community talking - and not just about all of its overt male nudity. Though the film was argu- ably pro-gay, given its satirical' take on American homophobia, many in the LGBT com- munity wereM horrified by its MATTHEW over-the-top per- GREEN sonification of gay stereotypes. And in truth, despite possibly good inten- tions, Bruno did occasionally cross the line. But I'm not convinced that Sacha Baron Cohen's gay caricature, however offensive, really had an impact on the way in which the mainstream straight population views gay men. After all, gays are everywhere these days. In addition to their greater vis- ibility intoday's more open societygay menarebecomingincreasinglypresent in popular film and television. Scads of sitcoms and feature films expose view- ers to what being gay is all about. That is, of course, if being gay means being fashion-obsessed, effeminate, gos- sipy and irrepressibly horny. Critics of "Bruno" are kidding themselves if they don't see these stereotypes in perhaps less explicit terms all over film and television. Such objectification isn't really new to show business. In another era, an audience might have laughed at a white actor in blackface acting how white society expected a black man to act. White people, who may never have had any meaningful experience with blacks, gleaned all their knowledge of black life through these images. But African Americans had a distinct culture during times of oppression to give them some sense of self, and gay adolescents have no such heritage granted to them at birth. This vacancy leaves them devoid of a model for self- expression apart from what they see on television as howa gay man is sup- posed to act. I realize now that such hackneyed expectations were probably the hard- est part for me in accepting. that I was gay. My uber-progressive parents, though probably less than thrilled, were totally accepting of my sexual- ity when I toldthem. And everyone in high school sort of figured that I was gay, so coming out wasn't exactly a challenge. My only real problem with my sexuality was the inadequacy it made me feel for being a bad dancer and having merely average fashion sense. I obsessed over feeling that I was something other than what gay guys are supposed to be, and in many ways, I tried to change myself. It's ironic, I suppose, that in an attempt to embrace what I was, I sought only to emulate others. But since I've seen through the fal- lacy that I have to look a certain way or like certain music to be a respect- able gay man, I've grown more frus- trated by the way the entertainment industry illustrates gays. It seems that whenever there's a gay character in a blockbuster movie, he's always the empathetic best friend or chic shop- ping buddy of a female protagonist in some sort of romantic quandary. In television, it's much of the same. Even on HBO, which is generally considered "gay-friendly," the same skewed archetypes peep through all over the place. Airing "Angels in America" and "The Laramie Project" in addition to adding gay subplots to virtually every original series has rev- olutionized the way that gay identity is addressed in entertainment. But in shows like "Entourage," "True Blood" and (most notably) "Sex and the City," pigeonholing of the gay male as an oversexed materialist abounds. It's ter- rific that each series features gay roles, but is it so much to ask that a sitcom highlight a gay character who is not a decorator, fashionista, or sexaholic? 4 Hollywood needs fewer gay stereotypes. There are, to be sure, examples of seemingly "normal" gay characters here and there. ABC's "Brothers and Sisters" comes to mind for featuring complex gay roles while avoiding cli- ches. During its run on HBO, "Six Feet Under" organically explored the emo- tions and intricacies of a committed gay couple. And who could forget the decidedly un-stereotypical "Broke- back Mountain"? But for the most part, Hollywood's representation of gay men is pretty two-dimensional. It's time for writ- ers and producers to incorporate more multifaceted gay personae into their shows. "Bruno" was uncomfortable for audiences because we are so inun- dated by flamboyant gay depictions in the media that viewers weren't consis- tently able to understand the film's big joke. Adding new gay themes would add freshness to tired plotlines, and would help straight and even gay peo- ple view gay life more favorably. - Matthew Green can be reached at greenmat@umich.edu. LETTERS TO THE EDITOR: Readers are encouraged to submit letters to the editor. Letters should be less than 300 words and must include the writer's full name and University affiliation. Letters are edited for style, length, clarity and accuracy. All submissions become property of the Daily. We do not print anonymous letters. Send letters to tothedaily@umich.edu. Relationship status: Healthy I I SEND LETTERS TO: TOTHEDAILY@UMICH.EDU Culture of cowbells is important to Michigan fans - the unificationc and his or her cla "cowbeller" suppt den, after seizing familiar beat, the F TO THE DAILY: the Jungle"? I am alittle concerned about the future ofnon- We cowbellers t marching band music being played at the Big for the band to fin House. Reading Matt Darby's thoughts (Michi- to be completed a gan Stadium needs to play right music for fans, talking before busi 09/15/2009) and Andy Reid (My pipe(d) dream: minute of "Lose Y a better Michigan Stadium mixtape, 09/14/2009) cuts off our bells. S got me thinking about what's important to stu- to accommodate?( dents and fans at a game. the public addres When I think of getting pumped up at the sta- than ten seconds, dium, my thoughts immediately direct toward last Saturday? the Michigan Marching Band. Whether it's Maybe I am be the Victors, Temptation and the Hawaiian War caught up in a Mi Chant (because you can't have one without the averse to change. other) or Ironman - the band is where it's at. bell. But maybe, y But we can't count on the band to play straight not something tha through the game. They need breaks. music. This is where the student section comes in. Scores of studen 20,000+ students screaming "Go Blue," cheer- and rock out beats ing on Michigan players and coaches is what ed about. The stat should be filling the silence. This is what I come I don't think we n to games for: camaraderie with the entire stu- to pump us up. W dent body - Ann Arbor, Flint, Dearborn and cowbells and we h Alumni. But what happens when the band isn't play- Avery Robinson ing and the students aren't cheering? Cowbells LSA sophomore osf a section under one person anging cowbell. But what is a osed to do when all of a sud- the opportunity to play the PA starts blaring "Welcome to try to be respectful - waiting ish, for the National Anthem nd for the announcer to stop ting outthe bell. Though a full ourself" excites the crowd, it Should we stop the cowbelling or do we keep going and hope ss system doesn't play more as happened multiple times ing selfish. Maybe I am just chigan tradition. Maybe I am Maybe I just love to beat my ou too find that cowbelling is at should get lost in recorded its bring their iron to the game for their section to get excit- dium is now much louder and eed all of this piped-in music Ve have the band, we have our ave each other. Go Blue! obody taught us how to love one another. Nobody taught us a book on how to ... control our emotions or our anger." Hip-hop artist Chris Brown made this con- nection between healthy relation- ship teaching and domestic violence _ prevention shortly after he received a slap on the wrist for ROSE beating and threat- AFRIYIE eningtokillhisgirl-_ friend Rihanna last February. It's rare to find common ground with someone you wouldn't spit on if they were on fire. But while Chris was attempting to abdicate his responsibility, he was making a valid point: an integral part of curbing violence involves teaching healthy relationships. Where to begin? Well, let's lay out the key questions. Howviolent do some relationships really get? Where do col- lege students fall in this and whyPAnd the crown jewel: in what ways can we foster healthy relationships? Wolverines, we have a problem. You know we are living in some scary times when a 20-something is beaten to deathbyher ex-man so badlybthat they need to run the serial number on her breastimplants to identify her, accord- ing to an article in the Los Angeles Times on Aug. 25. It's one thing if you can explain away the heightened vio- lence among young people by faulting celebrity eccentricity or just another hyper-macho man in the running to be the next Ike Turner. But college students, in significant numbers, are just as guilty of being perpetrators of violence in relationships. A 2008 study in the Archives of Pediatric Medicine reported that 17 percent of college stu- dents had been violent toward lovers or peers and 40 percent experienced emotional, sexual or physical violence. What gives? Researchers in the study say the support systems of col- lege students suffer when they make the transition into college. Further, young folk may be running amok because they aren't under the thumb of parental units anymore. And then there's the reason young folks do any- thing on campus: social validation. That's right, the 25.6 percent rate of campus violence found in the study is linked to the perennial need to be accepted by peers for the reputation of, in short, being a jerk. So, let's turn the tide and get to this healthy relationships stuff. Adoles- cent Health Working Group, an orga- nization I worked with this summer, compiled these major tenets of healthy relationships: pleasure, autonomy, consent, equality and respect. Pleasure. This may sound basic, but it's less commonly thought about than it may seem. Time spent with. your partner should be enjoyable and make you feel like you are a better person. I'm not just talking about the monthly orgasm tally either. Your con- versations, date nights and having sex should feel good to you significantly more than it rakes your nerves. Autonomy. You and your part- ner need space in your togetherness. This involves anything ranging from instilling separate activities to sepa- rate friendship networks. But the catch is, you shouldn't have to fight to get a weekend alone. And your all-boys vacation shouldn't feel like a threat to your relationship. You both should feel as comfortable together as you are apart. Check your clinginess. Consent. First off, your commit- ment doesn't translate to an all-access pass to booty. Like the airport, consent means there are routine check-ins when you first arrive and along the way. Desires should be discussed and both parties should be clear on what is okay and what is not okay sexually. As a gentle suggestion, conversation on sex should include protection methods and contingency plans in the event of contraceptive failure. Equality. Ah, my favorite. The key aspect of this concept is that decisions impacting the relationship are made together. This can involve discussions on how date night is spent to thinking about household labor divisions in the future. Equality also means that there are some things that won't be 50/50. But you discuss those things and com- pensate each other elsewhere if neces- sary. The top five ways to maintain a strong union. 0 HARUN BULJINA E-MAIL HARUN AT BULJINAH@UMICH.EDU H OW DARE Y MDL. C U - ' S \s Respect. I'll cut to the things Are- tha hasn't touched on. Your partner should respect your culture, bound- aries and opinions. By culture, this could be race-related or geographical. If you are a geek from Boston with a cute accent, your partner should value that and not make ita constant punch line. Boundaries are crucial, too. You should have an expectation that if you tell your partner you are too busy cramming, that they hold off texting you mug shots of their nether region. On the opinion front: your politics should get in the way of the feelings of the person in front of you. No matter the subject, you should be able to dis- agree agreeably. As these healthy relationship tidbits are fundamentally about communi- cation overall, I'll leave you with the words of India.Arie.While her lyrics in "Talk to Her" refer to women, all gen- ders need apply. "Whenyoutalktoher, talk to her like you'd want somebody to talk to your mama... Cause everything you do or say, you got to live with it everyday. She's somebody's baby. She's somebody's sister. She's somebody's mama." - Rose Afriyie is the Daily's sex and relationships columnist. She can be reached at sariyie@umich.edu. 0 EDITORIAL BOARD MEMBERS: Nina Amilineni, Emad Ansari, Emily Barton, Harun Buljina, Ben Caleca, Brian Flaherty, Emma Jeszke, Raghu Kainkaryam, Sutha K Kanagasingam, Erika Mayer, Edward McPhee, Asa Smith, Brittany Smith, Radhika Upadhyaya, Rachel Van Gilder, Laura Veith