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Personal Statement
My thrice broken heart ByElyanaTwiggs
am awakened by a green
nurse. Her features are
blurry and her voice is dis-
tant. She has four eyes. She makes
me repeat my name. I fail the
first test. I can talk now that the
breathing tube has been pulled
from my windpipe, but my voice is
harsh and barely audible. I think I
just swallowed sand coupled with
a handful of nails. I am sweating.
I am freezing. I am lifeless. The
sound of the machine next to me is
familiar and I hate the sound. I see
four dazzlingbags hanging quietly
on a metal pole beside me. I can't
read the long words printed on
them. I realize where I am - the
busiest place on earth.
The ICU buzzes around my
mechanicalbed;beepingmachines
conduct the orchestra of stressed
nurses and diligent physicians. A
diluted panic starts to spread over
me. Numb tears stream down my
colorless' cheeks. I don't deserve
this. You would- think after the
first two they would stop this tor-
ture.
My first open-heart surgery was
at five months old. The second was
at two years old. This agonizing
pain was because I was born with
a tiny defect: a hole in my heart,
which required that a hard, carbon
heart valve be inserted into my
tiny body. I underwent my third
MARTHA COOK
From Page 6B
in Oxford with every single door
closed, accounts of Martha Cook
made me realize that my resi-
dence hall experience is nowhere
near as enriching.
"It's just a really strong com-
munity," Humphrey said. "I have
made so many good friends. It
happens a lot that girls will live
here all four years, so it just really
adds to the community aspect."
Although Martha Cook has
been fulfilling for both Hahn and
Humphrey, they both stressed
that the lifestyle isn't for every-
one.
"We'll get a lot of freshmen
who will move out because they
want to join a sorority or decide
the lifestyle isn't for them," Hum-
phrey said. "But we also get a lot
of girls who really love it."
-EMMA JESZKE
heart surgery at 15 years old - the
day I recount here - to get my
heart valve replaced and a defibril-
lator to match. After this day, I will
have two new beautiful scars, both
of which you would probably stare
at unabashedly if you saw. Huge
scars that are mementos of three
heart surgeries before my 18th
birthday and a lifetime of medical
examination. You'd think living
with a congenital heart defect, I'd
get used to it. But you never really
get used to it.
The effects of the morphine
being pumped into my veins won't
allow me to comprehend my sur-
roundings. I feel groggy and slow.
I notice two thick tubes protrud-
ing from my stomach while a
brown liquid seeps into a bag at
the foot of my bed. I want to vomit.
I can't imagine what the liquid is,
since I haven't eaten anything in
30 hours. I still want to vomit.
I command my wrists to twist
around so I can see what is pinch-
ing me. The reaction is delayed;
moving my hands takes about two
minutes. Three IVs sprout from
my bruised wrists, and one of them
doesn't even lead to anything. The
thickest IVneedle springs from my
neck. I can't move my head to the
left because of it. My chest throbs
and my mouth hangs open. My
arms are being pulled in opposite
TOWN-GOWN
From Page 5B
city between the promise of new
jobs and tax revenue.
The property is probably in
more stable hands being owned
by the University than ifa private
company had purchased the site,
Bernstein said. But because the
University doesn't pay property
taxes, the city won't gain any tax
revenue in the deal.
Bernstein said he is hopeful
the city will eventually regain the
lost opportunity for tax revenue
through the new jobs and spin-off
projects that life science research
will bring to the city.
SHORING UP THE FUTURE
Ann Arbor seems to have all
the right ingredients for building
a knowledge economy based in
science and technology research,
but the catch is getting the hyper-
direct
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ions by an invisible force. and constant. I must accept that
ck burns from having been this will never be over. My eyelids
ted into an unnatural posi- won't open all the way.
uring a 12-hour surgery. The only thing I want is water.
ok down at the stitched skin I would sleep on the street for the
ng down my chest to my belly rest of my life just for a puny glass
. Steri-strips seem to hold of water. I beg the nurse - she
dy together. I want to rip gives me ice chips instead. I don't
off. I look like a monster or a want to die anymore. The last
one slides down my throat, drop-
ping into an empty stomach. My
parched esophagus thanks me.
w aking up My glazed over eyes can't read
fter my third the time. I assume it's the after-
noon since every light is shin-
open-heart ing directly at my eyes. It's 3 a.m.
- medication time. A syringe is
surgery in inserted into the I.V. through my
neck. I can feel the thin liquid
15 years seeping into my bloodstream. It's
cold and wet. I hope it will dull
the pain burning in my shoulder
blades so I can sleep. I can taste
the medicine. My eyelids droop
dy doll that has been stitched and I fall into a dreamless sleep. I
zardly after too much use. I thank God for this false escape.
e nurse some questions. She I wake up again abruptly. My
miles and tells me to sleep. nightmare is reality. It's been
mile is the same one I saw around six hours. I shouldn't have
I went to sleep in the first woken up. I look around and see.
I don't make sense. This something I have been missing.
akes me cry again. I am con- I recognize the shiny pupils and
d that I am trapped in some- white teeth of my mother, father
lse's body. I am screaming and sister. My beaten-up heart
he nurse just automatically swells. Everything in the room
, then walks by. No one can vanishes. My manipulated insides
me. My pain becomes dull and stretched open chest stop
throbbing. The tubes from my
stomach and catheter disappear.
The beeping machine stops beep-
ing. The blurry clock stops ticking.
I forget that I have a congenital
heart disease in the first place.
They are all I can see. They are all
I want to see. If it weren't for the
morphine, I would smile. Tears
are the only reaction I could mus-
ter. Tears of joy, tears of happiness,
tears of fear and tears of love.
My mom is crying, too. I don't
understand why. I don't care that
for the next two weeks, I would
be fighting to walk, and it would
be painful for me to sit up straight
for a month. I can't feel the bottom
half of my body butI can't care less.
I don't care how many times in the
future someone will ask me what
the long, pink line down my chest
is. I don't care about how if I don't
take my medicine regularly after
this day, I could be at high risk for
a stroke or heart attack. All I know
is that the people I love the most
are holding my limp hand and sit-
ting right next to me. I know that
life is truly beautiful. After this
point, I will know that my battle
is conquerable. At this moment,
I have never felt luckier. I am the
luckiest girl in the world.
- Elyana Twiggs is a reporter for
The Michigan Daily's News section.
turn to for a model in cultivating
an appealing environment for the
24-35 demographic.
In recent years, Ann Arbor offi-
cials have begun to warm to the
idea of high-density development
and developing the city's urban
core in hopes of luring in new busi-
nesses and investors.
Phrases like "walkability," "sus-
tainable growth" and "high-densi-
ty development" are buzzwords at
recent City Council and Downtown
Development Authority meetings.
But Glazer said there is room for
improvement on the city's part.
"It's still not at the right scale,"
he said.
Ann Arbor is uniquely posi-
tioned to become an example for
other cities on how to successfully
transfer to a knowledge economy,
said Hailu with the Land Policy
Institute.
"The only thing that might be
missing is the right investment,"
he said.
educated young professionals the
University turns out to stay in the
state and in the city.
The "brain drain" question is
one that Michigan researchers and
policy makers have struggled with
for years.
How important to the city's eco-
nomic future is it that this year,
Ann Arbor was named the third-
best "Walking City" by Prevention
Magazine? Or the top "College
Sports Town" by Forbes Maga-
zine? Or the "Best Place to Raise
Your Kids" by Business Week Mag-
azine?
More important than you might
think.
According to the report released
March 3 by the Land Policy Insti-
tute about attracting "knowledge
workers" - highly educated pro-
fessionals between 24 and 35 -
urban environments and cultural
attractions are crucial to new eco-
nomic growth.
Bernstein agreed, saying that
research increasingly shows that
the "knowledge workers" demo-
graphic first chooses where to live
based on quality of life and then
finds a job in that city.
Quality of life factors could
include everything from a city's
parks, schools, nightlife, art scene
or even the number of gyms per
capita.
Glazer cautioned that improving
quality of life as an economic strat-
egy is a relatively new approach
to city planning, so more research
needs to be done to understand
which factors weigh heaviest on
the minds of the coveted young
professional demographic.
To him, though, one thing is
clear..
"It sure ain't the weather," he
said.
The current top destination for
graduates from Michigan's public
universities is Chicago.
And it is large urban centers like
Chicago that city planners now
THE A.NN ARBOR
BUIBBLE
The city might seem isolated from Michigan's economic
troubles. But how secure is it, really? 4B