The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com

Thursday, October 23, 2008 - 5A


You're little brother'
because...

Nothing you've seen
this season...

By DAN FELDMAN
Daily Sports Editor
"I was just laughing. I thought
it wasfunny. They got excited.
Sometimes you
get your little
brother excited
when you're
playing bas-
ketball and you
let him get the
lead. Then you
just come and DAN
take it back."
-Mike Hart FELDMAN
on Nov. 3, 2007
As much as you try to escape it
Hart has you all figured out, Mich
igan State. You can run from th
truth all you want, but everything
you do screams "little brother."
You're little brother becaus
the only comeback Mark Danto
nio could think of was to call Hart
short.
You're little brother becaus
Chad Henne doesn't rhyme with
douchebag.
You're little brother because o
Braylon Edwards.
You're little brother becaus
football, not basketball, is Ameri
ca's favorite college sport.
You're little brother because
"your" biggest win last year was b
a I-AA school.
You're little brother becaus
John L. Smith slapped himself.
You're little brother because you
planted a flag in South Bend, then
fought Illinois for doing it to you.
You're little brother becauss
Sportsline.com's Dennis Dodd
listed Michigan State coach Marl

Dantonio (along with coaches from
Temple, Cincinnati and Brigham
Young) before the season as
"coaches who will soon have big-
time jobs."
You're little brother because
you're the lowest-rated school aca-
demically in the Big Ten.
You're little brother because
you're too dumb to care.
You're little brother because
when your plans to copy the his-
toric success of Michigan football
went up in flames against Ohio
State on Saturday, you (allegedly)
tried to emulate the Wolverines'
(alleged) football player-on-hockey
player violence.
, You're little brother because you
probably don't know what emulate
e means.
g You're little brother because
your girls' fake tans, sloppy blonde
e dye-jobs and low standards don't
- mean they're that hot.
t You're little brother because you
can't be a great party school and
e charge five dollars for acup.
h You're little brother because the
University of Chicago has more Big
f Ten football titles than you do.
You're little brother because
e your inferiority complex is so big
- that "smash right through that line
of blue" and "Michigan is weaken-
e ing" were lines in your original
y fight song.
You're little brother because
e you had a clock counting down the
seconds until the Michigan game
u months before the game time was
n decided.
You're little brother because
o after all the clock hype, you lost
I anyway.
k You're little brother because

rioting and couch burning are the
highlights of your college years.
You're little brother because you
don't understand that jokes like
"What does a Michigan State grad
call a Michigan grad? Boss." can't
be reversed, so you do it anyway.
You're little brother because
you were giddy with your foot-
ball team's 7-6 record last season,
which would have been the Wol-
verines' worst in 23 years.
You're little brother because
you've tried to replace a 111-year
tradition of mediocrity with clips
from "300."
You're little brother because you
take being favored against Michi-
gan as a victory in itself.
You're little brother because,
deep down, you know your annual
collapse is just beginning.
You're little brother because six
straight will become seven on Sat-
urday.
Now, before you flood my inbox
with poorly written letters, let's
take care of a couple likely cot-
plaints.
"But Michigan State is better at
basketball."
- Like I wrote above - and I know
you have troublereading- football,
not basketball, is America's favorite
college sport. Let me know when
you get the 75,000 people who
attend your football games to go
to a basketball game, let alone the
110,000 that pack the Big House.
"I got into Michigan and Michi-
gan State and chose Michigan State
because it's better."
You're lying.
- Dan Feldman can be reached
at danfeldCqumich.edu.

By JACOB CARPENTER
The State News
There's an old saying that you're
never supposed to kick a dog when,
it's down.
Whoever
coined that
phrase never said
anything about
wolverines. "
There is plenty
of ammunition
with which to
launch an insult JACOB
assaultagainstthe CARPENTER
Michigan Wol-
verines this season, but I'm going to
take the high road (I-96, not U.S. 23)
in this annual tradition of bashing
each other's team.r
I will not say one bad word about
Michigan fans or the football pro-
gram in this space.
I know the fans in Ann Arbor
are all-consumed by their beloved
Wolverines, so I'm going to tell you
a little bit about what's going on in
East Lansing with the MSU football
team:
The Spartans HAVE A WIN-
NING RECORD (3-1 Big Ten, 6-2
overall) after two-thirds of the
season. It started with a close road
loss at Pac-10 foe California, which
was disheartening but somewhat
expected given the game was a sea-
son opener on the West Coast.
MSU followed up the loss by
BEATING A MID-AMERICAN
CONFERENCE TEAM, shutting
out a pesky Florida Atlantic squad
in a downpour and CRUSHING
NOTRE DAME to finish the non-
conference schedule.
After three consecutive Big

Ten victories - Indiana, Iowa and
Northwestern - to start the con-
ference season, the Spartans ran
into the buzzsaw of Terrelle Pryor,
Chris 'Beanie' Wells and the domi-
nant Ohio State defense last week
(you'll get to know all of them soon
enough).
MSU is led by a RELIABLE
QUARTERBACK, Brian Hoyer,
who has thrown only four inter-
ceptions while leading his team to
BOWL ELIGIBILITY early in the
season. In the backfield, the Spar-
tans boast a stockpile of RUNNING
BACKS WHO HAVEN'T BEEN
ARRESTED THIS YEAR, led by
senior Doak Walker Award candi-
date Javon Ringer. The VETERAN
OFFENSIVE LINE has helped
pave the way for Ringer to rack up
1,179 rushing yards and 14 touch-
downs in just eight games, while
giving Hoyer ample time to hit
his relatively young group of wide
receivers.
The constantly improving MSU
defense has been up-and-down,
with strong performances against
Florida Atlantic, Notre Dame and
Iowa and less-than-stellar outings
against California, Indiana and
Ohio State. (It looks like the Wol-
verines are experiencing the same
yo-yo effect on defense with a solid
showing against Wisconsin but col-
lapses at the hands of Illinois and
Penn State).
On special teams, the Spartans
boast Brett Swenson, an IMPRES-
SIVE KICKER WHO DOESN'T
CHOKE and has connected on 15
straight kicks, after missing his first
of the season and NORMALLY-
NAMED PUNTER Aaron Bates,
who has routinely pinned oppo-

nents inside their own five-yard line
all season.
Roaming the sidelines is Mark
Dantonio, A CLASSY COACH lead-
ing one of the best up-and-coming
teams in the country.
Dantonio displayed his integrity
at MSU even before he arrived in
East Lansing; he DIDN'T SCREW
OVER HIS FORMER EMPLOY-
ER before coming to Michigan
State, choosing to wait until the end
of Cincinnati's season prior to inter-
viewing with MSU officials for the
head coaching position.
Accordingtoplayersandrecruits,
Dantonio and his coaches have
instilled a solid foundation of FAM-
ILY VALUES while taking the
team to a BOWL GAME IN THE
STAFF'S FIRST SEASON.
In recruiting, Dantonio and his
assistants have hit the Midwest
hard, RESPECTING IN-STATE
PROSPECTS that are the basis of
slug-it-out Big Ten football. The
Spartans have snagged 16 recruits
for a top-15 class of 2009 (which
puts them in the same class as U-M
this season).
The MSU football program
appears to be HEADED IN THE
RIGHT DIRECTION, and a win in
Ann Arbor on Saturday should con-
tinue its ascension to the top of the
Big Ten.
Just like the Wolverines' pro-
gram, right?
Told you I wouldn't say one bad
word about Michigan.
-Jacob Carpenter is a football
reporter for The State News. Hate mail
can be sent to corpe2t9@msu.edu, but
there shouldn't be any hate mail, since
nothing bad was said about Michigan.


Blown assignment dooms Wolverines
with one-goal loss to fifth-ranked Zips
Michigan can't
convert penalty kick,
shut out by Akron
onroad
By JAKE FELDMAN
For the Daily
The high-pitched shriek of the
referee's whistle quieted an oth-
erwise hostile Akron crowd. '
After
Michigan AKRON 1
juniorfor- MICHIGAN 0
ward Peri
Marosevic was violently dropped Hs'
by a late tackle inside the 18-yard
box, senior captain Michael Holo-
dy prepared himself for a penalty
kick that could even the score SAID ALSALAH/Daily
with about 35 minutes remaining Senior captain Michael Holody missed his first penalty kick of the season as the Wolverines fell short last night against Akron.
in Wednesday night's game. He
planted his left foot deep in the Steve Bonnell and Marosevic
turf and struck the ball. both squandered open shots at
Akron goalkeeper Evan Bush the goal.
guessed Holody would send the The Zips found the net in the -
ball wide and low. 17th minute, capitalizing on a
He was right. Wolverine blown assignment.
"He stretched out horizontal Akron's Anthony Ampaipitak-
to the ground and got fingertips wong was left wide open in the
to it and really pushed it into box and rocketed a volley past
the post," Michigan coach Steve Michigan redshirt junior goal-
Burns said. keeper Patrick Sperry.


" cc
ha
- Ste
No.
ranked
Jackso
Holody
season
alty kic
"I pn
of prid
I like t
ball in
The
gave A
Confer
ninth
Bush,
goals t
MAC in
The
9-4-2
opport
utes of

"That kid lined it up and just
hit a full volley, a screamer. and
I could barely react to it," Sperry
In the second said. "He just smoked it. He was
unmarked, and it was kind of a
ilf3 the game gift to them, almost."
Akron students heckled the
is really ours Michigan keeper throughout
the game, following him to the
to take." opposite side of the field in the
second half. Fully equipped
eve Burns, Michigan coach with horns, drums and profani-
ty-laden songs, the fans erupted
after the score.
Despite the electric environ-
s Akron defeated the 21st- ment, the Wolverines stayed
Wolverines 1-0 at Lee focused until the end. They out-
n Field. Before the game, hustled the Zips in the second
had been perfect on the half with extremely physical
with two successful pen- play and were sparked by a late
ks. substitution at midfield.
actice them a lot and kind "(Senior) Nader Jarun came
e myself on them because in at the right mid and put ahard
o get up there and put the tackle on a player, and that kind
the net," Holody said. of set the tone and everyone fed
Zips' highly-touted defense off that," Burns said. "When
Akron (4-0 Mid-American we brought that in the second
ence, 12-1-2 overall) its half, the game was really ours
straight victory behind to take."
who has yielded just four But they couldn't quite reach

International
Career
Pathways
Come to the 6" annual series of events in which students, professionals and representatives
gather to explore pathways to international careers
International Opportunities Fair
Thursday, October 23, 2008
2-6 pm, Michigan Union
Meetrepresentativesofoorganizations to findoutabout:
Programs for work, internships, volunteering, & teaching abroad
. Organizationsofferinginternationalcareers
International Career Panel Discussions
Careers in International Health & Humanitarian Relief
Wednesday October 22, 5-6:30 PM, Michigan Union Anderson Room
Global Careers in Information & Technology
Wednesday October 22 5-6:30 PM, Michigan Union Kuenzel Room
Teaching & Volunteering Abroad
WednesdayOctober22, 7- PM. Michigan Unio nPond Room
Peace Corps & Your International Career
Thursday0ctober23,7-8:30PMMichiganUnion U-Club
Graduate Internships in Africa
Wednesday October 29. Noon-1:00 PM, Weill Hall Room 1110
International Environmental Careers
Thursday October 3,6-7:30PMrDanaBldg Room1040
http:flintemationalcenter.umich.edulswt
littiivvarl CireeriP'thway1
Sposored by:
The career center - The College of Engineering -Gerald R. Ford School of Public Policy -
Germanic Languages and Literatures - International center - International Institute ~
The School of Information - The School of Natural Resources & The Environment

his season and leads the
n shutouts.
Wolverines (1-1-1 Big Ten,
overall) had many scoring
unities in the opening min-
'the game, but midfielder

it.
After Wednesday's loss to
Akron, Michigan will face
another stiff test Saturday on
the road against No. 2 North-
western.

4I