U U U S S U S S S S - 5. .. 0 Se' 0 1 0 0 e 0 0 O ther victors valiant THE EDITOR'S NOTEBOOK with JESSICA VOSGERCHIAN A look at the big news events this week and how important they really are. Conveniently rated from one to10. Magazine Editor: Jessica Vosgerchian Editor in Chief: Andrew Grossman Managing Editor: Gabe Nelson Photo Editor: Chanel Von Habsburg- Lothringen Junk Drawer: Brian Tengel Center spread design: Hillary Ruffe Cover photo: Rob Migrin The Statement is The Michigan Daily's news magazine, distributed every Wednesday during the academic year new rules rule 145: Face it. You're never going to win an argu- ment with a Diag evangelist. rule 146: Sending a long e-mail from your phone isn't an excuse to walk like an oblivious jerk. rule 147: Michigan Time doesn't apply to everything. See: Booty calls, meet- ing parents and picking up notes from your friend in lecture. - E-mail role submissions to TheStatement@umich.eda 2 3 MARCIA, MARCIA, BETTY FORD A 52-year-old Maureen McCormick, who played Marcia Brady on "The Brady Bunch," came out with a memoir Tuesday detailing the secret life of debauchery she led while playing TV's quintessential girl next door. In her book, "Here's the Story: Surviving Marcia Brady and Finding My True Voice," McCormick discusses her romance with Barry "Greg Brady" Williams, parties at the Playboy Mansion and the times she traded sexfor drugs tilling in the blanks for the adolescent fantasies of 50-year-old men everywhere. if your father uncharacteristically attends a book signing this month, do yourself a favor and don't ask who the author is. OBAMA RUMORMONGER The man who is credited with starting the rumor that Barack Obama is secretly a Muslim has reached mainstream TV from the murkiest depths of the blogosphere. Andy Martin, the creator of an anti-Obama website, appeared on the Fox News Channel last week where he claimed that Obama had trained to overthrow the government. Aftergraduating law school, Martin was blocked from admission to the Illinois bar because ofta pyschiatric diagnosis of "moderately severe character defect manifested by well-documented ideation with a paranoid flavor and agrandiose character." A grandiose personality and a flair for vindictive rumors? Someone's positioned to be the Karl Rove of a McCain cabinet. So Michigan Football lost to a Mid-American Conference team and might not even make a bowl game. But not all Wolverines are losers. Try basing your self-esteem on the victories of these teams instead. Mike Dolsen I Daily Staff Writer THE FOLEY CURSE After a segment by ABC News reported Rep. Tim Mahoney (D- Fla.) paid a former staffer $121,000 to avoid a sexual harassment law suit, the accused congressman called on the House ethics committee to investigate his own behavior. Of course, 5 Mahoney would want to differentiate himself as much as possible from his congressio- nal seat predecessor, former Rep. Mark Foley, who resigned in 2006 after his own sex scandal involving inappropriate interaction with male House pages. Said one Demo- cratic operative: "The irony is not lost on any of us." But as the Florida Department of Law Enforcement just let Foley off without charges, lets see if the Dems are ready for the irony of Mahoney's self-induced investigation getting him jail time. DEPTH, INTELLECTUAL RIGOR, PROFESSIONAL ACTION, CREATIVITY Our distinctive master's degree programs and cutting-edge certificate program combine course work with opportunities for practical application - just 15 miles north of New York City. " Art of Teaching " Human Genetics " Child Development and " Theatre Dual Degree with " Women's History and Joint NYU School of Social Work Degree with Pace Law School " Dance Writing " Health Advocacy " Public Health Genetics/ Genomics Certificate Come talk to us at the ANN ARBOR "rn GRADUATE SCHOOL FAIR on Fr Tuesday, October 14 from 4-7 p.m. at the Michigan Union, 530 South State Street Sarah Lawrence College, 1 Mead Way, Bronxville, NY 10708-5999 www.sarahlawrence.edu/graduate 914-395-2371 grad@sarahlawrence.edu The University Ballroom Dancing Team placed first in 31 out of 38 categories in a competition last year. BALLROOM DANCING The University Ballroom Dance Team is a prime exam- ple of a team that is striving to continue the University's legacy as an athletic powerhouse. In the nine years since it was founded, the team has won three national champi- onships. The team competes as pairs in four dance categories - American Smooth, International Standard, American Rhythm and International Latin - against teams from Big Ten schools. Last year, at the Eighth Annual University of Michigan Ballroom Dance Competition, the University's team placed first in 31 of the 38 categories. Purdue beat out Michigan in the other seven categories. Team Captain Eric Yu said that Purdue has always been the team's biggest rival, particularly because their team has a lot of Latin American dancers who dominate the International Latin category. Yu, an LSA senior who began dancing competitively after beingtold that he was a "pretty good dancer" during free salsa lessons, said his team's rivalry with the Purdue team is intense. During a 2005 competition, the team was significantly lagging behind the then-superior Purdue team the Ohio Star Ball. Yu said former captain Kostas Varsos gath- ered the team together and pumped up the dancers, a la Remember the Titans. "He told us that we really need to step it up and focus," Yu said. "After the next two events, we didn't only beat them but by far beat them. That was the last year that we were a small organization." ULTIMATE FRISBEE Frisbee might seem like an activity just for frequent patrons of head shop Forty-Two Degrees, but the University's MagnUM Ultimate Frisbee Team is made up of former high school sports stars and renowned frisbee phenoms. Nearly half of MagnUM's 25-man squad was recruited from top Ultimate Frisbee programs across the country, Mag- nUM Assistant Coach Ryan Purchell said. In 2008, MagnUM placedfirst out of eight teams in the Michigan Indoor, first out of 30 at the Mudbowl, first out ofl16 at the Great Lakes Regionals and tenth out of 16 atthe Ultimate Players Association College Championships. The men of MagnUM are exemplary of the athlete ideal, on and off the field. Last season, while traveling to Texas for a tournament, 16 members of the team were left stranded in Detroit due to a severe winter storm. Instead of calling it quits, these guys drove down to Cincinnati to catch alternate flights. "We ended up on Saturday upsettingcthe previously unbeaten national champion," Purcell said. "The team that hadn't lost in 16 months, and we gave them their first loss of the season." -0-