10 - Friday, April 11, 2008

1-14
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The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com


I still love the sinners

President of the Sins of Sports
Fans: Ladies and gentleman, I
want to thank you for attending
this year's Sins of Sports Fans
Convention. We
have very impor-
tant business
to take care of
today.
People are get- A
ting tired of our}
behavior. Blog- H. JOSE
gers, columnist BOSCH
and TV show
hosts alike think our words and
actions are an embarrassment to
;sports fandom. For years, we have
been pushed to the side, and we
shouldn't tolerate it any longer.
(Polite applause)
So, we have to think of ways
to improve our image. Does any-
one have suggestions to open our
forum?
Guy on cell phone waving: Hey!
.. Hey! Over here!
President: Yes, you in the back.

Guy on cell phone waving: No, I
wasn't talking to you. I'm talking
to my friend watching on televi-
sion. Hey, you can hear me now
too? Awesome!
President: See, this is what I'm
talking about, people, we must
stop this kind of behavior.
The wave starter: One ... two ...
three, woooooo! (silence) Come
on guys, what's wrong with you!
President: Sir, this isn't even a
sporting event. Why are you try-
ing to start the wave?
The wave starter: Come on,
man have some fun! Everyone,
one ... two ... three, woooooo!
President: Let's move forward.
I've drafted some rules and regu-
lations we should follow to earn
ourselves more respect. Rule No.
1...
Armchair quarterback: Excuse
me.
President: Yes?
Armchair quarterback: You
need to speak louder. And you

should've worn a black suit
instead of a gray suit. If I was
up there, I'd talk loudly and look
good so I'd get everyone's atten-
tion.
President: You're wearing gym
shorts and a T-shirt right now.
You don't even have shoes on.
Armchair quarterback: I'm just
saying.
President: Guys, we have to
focus. This is important. Now ...
Streaker: Wooooooooooooo!
Go Blue! (Dashes across stage)
President: See, this is what I'm
talking about. That's very annoy-
ing.
Fairweather fan: Yeah man,
that sucks.
The wave starter: I don't think
streaking is that bad.
Fairweatherfan:Streakingisn't
that bad.
President: Are you listening
to yourself? Don't you see why
people can't stand fans like us?
We have to change our ways to be

accepted by the mainstream.
Pink hat-wearingperson: Why?
President: Well, because...
Painted chest guy: We're just
trying to have fun at games. If
anything, we should work toward
making others accept us rather
than trying to conform to their
standards of "true" fandom.
All: Yeah!
President: So, is anyone in favor
of changing anything?
(Silence)
President: All right then. We
have that settled. Next up, an
interesting presentation called
"ESPN: Everyone Should Prepare
Nice signs."
- Over his four years at
Michigan, Bosch has learned to
embrace all kinds of fans. He wants
to thank those fans who have
read all his columns and provided
compliments, insults or left it on
the ground in Angell Hall. He can be
reached at hectobos@umich,edu.

A
.4

Big Ten's top two
teams to Coll ide

Consistency key for weekend Big Ten series

By IAN KAY
Daily Sports Writer
When Michigan played Min-
nesota in the opening game of the
Louisville Tournament a month
ago, its record
was 17-2.
The Wolver- Michigan at
Ines' record in Wisconsin
the following 19
Matchup:
games: 17-2. Miciga
Michigan 34-4;
won that game Wisconsin
with the Golden 11-29
Gophers 7-2 When: Today
with a true team 7 P.M.
effort, as 10 dif-
ferent players Where:
reachedbase. Go an
No. 6 Michi-
gan (7-1 Big Ten,
34-4 overall) finds itself in an
oddly similar position now, pre-
paringforaweekend series against
Wisconsin and Minnesota.
Michigan coach Carol Hutchins
stresses consistency as the most
important factor in that success.
If stats are any indication, she

formance," Hutchins said.
Wisconsin (1-7, 11-29) has been
consistent, but not in a good way.
The Badgers have won just one of
their last nine games and haven't
scored more than three runs in
any contest since March 22.
After games against the Bad-
gers on Friday and Saturday, the
Wolverines head west for a Sunday
doubleheader against the Gophers
(4-2,21-10).
InLouisville, Michiganroughed
up Gopher starter Katie Dalen for
six earned runs in seven innings.
This time the Wolverines will
not only see Dalen in the circle,
but also the Gophers' best pitcher,
Briana Hasset (14-4, 1.82 ERA).
In their meeting last year, Has-
set stifled the Wolverine offense,
striking out seven in a 2-0 Min-
nesota win.
Hutchins know that consisten-
cy is the best wayto avoid a similar
result this season.
"This group is very talented,"
she said. "I just want them to play
their game. If they just d% what
they do, they'll be fine."

By CHRIS MESZAROS
Daily Sports Writer
If last year was any indicator,
the Michigan baseball team could
be in for its most
important series
of the season this Michigan
weekend. at Illinois
It will also be
one of the tough- Matchup:
est. Illinois 18-8
The 22nd- I
ranked Wolver- When: Today
ines, who lead the 7:05 P.M.
Big Ten, head to Where:
Champaign for a Illinois Field
battle against sec- TV/Radio:
ond-place Illinois. MGoBlue.com
Last year,
Michigan came
into the series with victories in all
of their previous series against Big,
Ten opponents. But it split against
the Fighting Illini.
Although the Wolverines (7-1
Big Ten, 18-8 overall) have a better
conference record this season, the
Illini (6-3, 18-8) dominate many of
the important statistical categories.
Illinois leads the conference in
batting average (334) and runs
(193). It also has the fewest errors
(22) of all Big Ten teams.
But if the Wolverines play like

they did Wednesday in their 12-4
win over Toledo, Illinois might not
be much ofaproblem.
Michigan broke out of its offen-
sive slump, belting three home runs
in the game and scoring four runs
in each of the first three innings.
"Usually, hitting is contagious,"
Michigan coach Rich Maloney said.
"Normally, if guys start to feel a
little bit better about themselves,
their confidence grows, and usually,
you get better results. We're going
to need it against a really good Illi-
nois team."
Although the Wolverines put up
12 runs against a middling Mid-
American Conference opponent,
they scored just one run in two of
four games against Penn State last
weekend.
"Our offense is finally starting
to come through after a lazy week-
end," senior Nate Recknagel said.
"It's pretty nice that we're starting
to hit well, because we're going into
a tough series."
Although Michigan has been
inconsistent lately, Maloney and
the Wolverines just plan to play
their game this weekend.
"If we play error-free baseball
and start hitting the baseball,
we're a pretty good team," Malo-
ney said.

Freshman pitcher Jordan Taylor has been a model of consistency this season,
combining with sophomore Nikki Nemitz for a 0.62 earned run average.

should be pleased with her team's
performance this season.
Before the first Minnesota
game, the Wolverines were bat-
ting .275 and had a .969 fielding
percentage. Pitchers Nikki Nemitz
and Jordan Taylor had combined
for a 0.57 earned run average.
Nineteen games later, the

numbers are remarkably similar.
Michigan's lineup checks in with
an average of .296 and the field-
ing percentage is .967. Nemitz and
Taylor have been just as dazzling
with a 0.62 combined ERA.
"Whether it's your pitcher, or
your No. 3 hitter or your No. 9 hit-
ter, we just want consistent per-


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C . '