2 - Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Saved by mai*ntenance
PROTESTING IN PAJAMAS
My friend and I were running See something that embo
late to a play rehearsal at the ies the Ann Arbor or Univ(
Mendelssohn Theater. We luck- sity of Michigan experienc
ily snagged a parking spot across E-mail submissions to gro
the street in front of University email@example.com.
Health Services, so we figured
we were in the clear. Somehow, thought it over for a whole min
impossibly, inconceivably, my before calmly issuing orders.
friend dropped his car keys - "First, let's lift the car off1
right through an iron sewer grate grate."
(of course, his spare was with his And so we did. Thankfu
family .. in Chicago). Luckily the Saabs are made of plastic.
keys were still visible, but the car Then we removed the gr:
was parked on top of the grate. but the keys were about 10-f
We proceeded to fashion a below. My friend and I watcl
retrieving device out of a dowel as the maintenance guys pul
rod and a windshield scraper, their van next to the gr:
though we only succeeded in When they opened the slid
pushing the keys farther into the side door, we saw the solutior
sewer. We were fast running out insanely high-powered vacu
of time. cleaner. They took the nozzle
Then, it appeared: a white van the end of the tube, lowered1
with maize and blue lettering. tube down in the sewer and t:
It was a two-mai maintenance was it. We dug around the du
crew, and they pulled into the insides of the vacuum cleaner:
UHS driveway. After explaining retrieved the keys.
our pitiful situation to them, they No, this was not a "MacGyv
DPS issuies alert described as 5'10", about 25 years
old with dark hair in cornrows.
He was last seen wearing a dark-
after 2 assaults colored fleece top. a
The Department of Public
near campus Safety encourages you to call
734-763-1131 if you have any
The Department of Pub- information concerning either
lic Safety issued a crime alert case.
after receiving two reports of
unarmed robbery. Both inci- Student urinates
dents took place on Oct. 26 .one
at about 9 p.m. and the other at in dorm closet
about 9:30 p.m.
In each incident, the sus- WHERE: Stockwell Hall
pects approached the victim WHEN: Sunday at about 5:15
from behind, police said. a.m.
The suspects stole a shoulder WHAT: A male University stu-
bag from the victims in each dent was charged with a minor
case, police said. The first inci- in possession of alcohol, DPS
dent occurred on the 600 block reported. The male student was
of Monroe Street, and the other intoxicated while he walked
took place on the 1300 block of with a female student to her
White Street. No weapons were dormitory, Stockwell Hall. Once
observed in either incident, they arrived back to the dormi-
according to police. tory, the male student urinated
Witnesses described the first in a closet. The female student's
suspect as a 5'8" muscular male roommate was upset about the
around 25 years oldwith dark urination and so notified DPS
hair and a dark-colored fleece officers. After beingcited by
accordingto DPS. The other police, the male student was
top, woringatoDP.Te, war given a ride home ina yellow
suspect, who was also male, was taxi cab.
Mini-me he's not
I was on the sidelines, cover-
ing the football game on Saturday
and chatting with someone from
Event Staff whose job is to keep
photographers from getting too
close to the field.
He pointed out Vern Troyer,
the actor who played Mini-me
in "Austin Powers: The Spy Who
Shagged Me." After gawking for
about 30 seconds, the Event Staff-
er asked if I wanted to introduce
myself to him.
We went over to where he was
seated, and the event staffer said
Troyer, obviously offended,
sternly responded "My name
is Vern." I then greeted Vern, Mi
introduced myself, and shook his ing
PETER SCHOTTENFELS qua
AMPUS EVENTS & NOTES
ke Wade stands on Liberty Street wearing pajamas, hold-
a coffee pot and mug protesting the war in Iraq. He said he
nts Americans to wake up and realize the possible conse-
ences of war.
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WHAT: A panel discussion
on how to boost your law
school resume led by law
school admissions officers
from Duke, Cornell, NYU and
WHO: The Career Center
WHEN: Today from 7 to 8:30
WHERE: 100 Hutchins Hall
WHAT: A meeting for stu-
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239 and 241
WHAT: A discussion focusing
on educating women in the
state of Michigan in techno-
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tion of Women
WHEN: Today from 11:30
a.m. to 1 p.m.
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Please report any error in the
Daily to corrections@michi-
Doctors around the coun-
try are experimenting
with the use of hot sauce
to numb the pains that accom-
pany deep flesh cuts, The Asso-
ciated Press reported. Medical
practitioners have used hot
sauce because one of its main
ingredients, capsaicin, targets
The Michigan football
team thinks defenive
tackle Will Johnson looks
like Paul Bunyan. The compari-
son came up because Michigan
and Michigan State battle for
Paul Bunyan's Axe each season.
>>FOR MORE, SEE SPORTS, PAGE 9A
Researchers who helped
discover a new species of
Mexican butterflies are
lookingto sell the naming rights
for the insects toraise money for
more research, the AP reported.
Researchers are looking to raise
at least $50,000.
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Pick the time that fits your schedule.
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