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DAME P DN
DAILY SPORTS BREAKS DOWN THE WEEKEND THAT WAS

The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com

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2B - Monday, April 16, 2007

SAID AND HEARD
"I've been a Michigan fan since I was
knee-high to a grasshopper, so you have
no idea how much ofa thrill it is to be
standing in front of you."
- Michigan women's basketball coach Kevin Borseth
at his introductory press conference on Friday.

ATHLETE OF THE WEEK
TATJANA THUENER-REGO
The sophomore won the all-around title with a
score of 39.45 at the NCAA Northeast Regional
Championship, which were held at Crisler Arena.
The stellar performance helped propel the
Michigan to the NCAA Tournament.

SPORTSMONDAY COLUMN
Bust out the red carpet:
it's the inag uraiHermiles

'M'NOTE
Records for Blue

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The Michigan men's track and
field team split up this weekend
for two different events. But that
didn't stop them from world-class
performances.
At the Sea Ray Relays in Knox-
ville, Tenn., which featured both
amateur and professional ath-
letes, senior Jeff Porter clocked
the fastest time of any collegiate

participant in the 110-meter hur-
dles, finishing in seventh place
overall with a time of 14.25 sec-
onds.
At the Spartan Invitational in
East Lansing, sophomore Jus-
tin Switzer won the 800-meter
run with a personal-best time of
1:52.06.Heshatteredhisoldrecord
by more than half a second.

This being my final Sports-
Monday column of the
school year, I decided it
would only be
appropriate to
honor some of
the great sports
achievements
of the past nine
months. How
about Florida's
repeat NCAA
Championship
or Zach John- JACK
son's improb- HERMAN
able win at --
Augusta or the
Detroit Tigers'
resurgence last fall?
I compiled a list of those who.
reached magnificent heights
both at Michigan and across the
country. It included people like
swimmer Alex Vanderkaay, the
Wolverine who captured National
Title in March, and the Michi-
gan women's cross country team,
which won its fifth straight Big
Ten Title last fall.
I couldn't forget the Rutgers
football team, which embodied
the spirit of my home state right
through bowl season, or Tiger
Woods, who after coping with
the death of his father, reminded
everyone why, quite simply, he's
Tiger.
But then I asked myself why be
appropriate when it's much more
fun to do the opposite.
So rather than dedicate my hur-
rah to those who inspired us all,
I'll honor those who went above
and beyond to embarrass both
themselves and others.
Without further ado, I present
the inaugural (and likely only)
Hermie Awards:
Mike Tyson Citizen of the
Year Award: Many predicted that
holding the NBA All-Star Game in
Las Vegas could only mean trou-
ble. And Tennessee Titans cor-

nerback Pacman Jones did all he
could to prove them right.
First, he shows up at a Vegas
strip club with $81,000 - all in
singles. He then allegedly insti-
gated a fight that led to a triple
shooting that lefta former profes-
sional wrestler paralyzed.
This along with some of Pac-
man's other run-ins with the law
prompted NFL commissioner
Roger Goodell to hand down a
season-long suspension to Jones
and write a strongly worded let-
ter explaining to Jones that his
"conduct has brought embarrass-
ment and ridicule upon yourself,
your club, and the NFL, and has
damaged the reputation of players
throughout the league."
My only question: Without his
$1.92 million salary, how will
Jones make it rain?
Ty Cobb Sportsman of the
Year: Never one to turn down
the chance to go spikes up into
an opponent, the namesake of
this award would be proud of the
two-handed hockey-stick swing
this year's recipient, New York
Islander Chris Simon, landed
across the chin of Ryan Holiweg
during a March 8 game against
the Rangers. Narrowly avoiding
assault charges from the Nassau
County District Attorney, Simon
is serving a long suspension.
Somewhere, Marty McSorley
tips his helmet in approval.
Amadou Ba Fuzzy Memory
Award: One year after claim-
ing he didn't remember pushing
a Michigan State student to the
ground prior to a game in East
Lansing, Ba proudly passes the
torch to former teammate Lester
Abram, who deniedbeing arrested
following a traffic incident in Ing-
ham County. Abram was cited for
driving with a suspended license
and driven back to Ann Arbor by
the police but told reporters that
he was never arrested.

Sorry, Lester, but the Ingham
County sheriff's department and
their police reports beg to differ.
Terrell Owens Teammates of
the Year Award: Many probably
thought Liverpool striker Craig
Bellamy's decision to celebrate an
equalizing goal against Barcelona
by pretending to swing a golf club
was rather harmless and perhaps
even funny.
That group didn't include team-
mate John Arne Riise.
Just a few days prior, the two
argued after Riise refused to join
Bellamy in Karaoke. Bellamy's
response: searching out Riise at
2 a.m. and repeatedly cracking a
golf club across his legs.
Most regrettably, he failed to
yell "Fore!"
John Rocker Public Relations
Reward: One of the most diffi-
cult races for the handicappers to
pick, this one went right down to
the wire.
Former NBA point guard Tim
Hardaway publicized his views
of homosexuals (he "hates" them)
and former NBA star Micheal
Ray Richardson let it be known
he thought his "big-time Jew
lawyers" came from a group of
"crafty people" who are "hated
all over the world." Celtics broad-
caster Tommy Heinsohn entered
the fray when he commented on
Yao Ming's injured "chopstick
finger," but judges decided the
Hall of Famer was too old for any-
one to care.
The winner, though, emerged
only recently when radio icon
Don Imus called members of the
Rutgers women's basketball team
"nappy-headed hos."
John Rocker would be proud to
ride the 7 train with you anytime,
Don.
George W. Bush Executive of
the Year Award: I know all you
Lions fans are clamoring for this
to go to Matt "I've never seen a
wide receiver I didn't love" Mil-
len, but I'm going to have ship
this one to 4 Pennsylvania Plaza,
New York, New York 10001, Attn:
James Dolan.
After watching Isiah Thomas
accomplish the daunting task
of coaching the below-average
team he assembled to just slight-
ly-below-average results in the
ultra-tough Atlantic Division,
Dolan threw a nice big contract
extension Thomas's way.
The Knicks have gone 3-14
since.
So as New York end its season
with the chance of finishing as
the fifth-worst team in the NBA
(with no draft pick to show for it),
I think there's only one thing left
to say:
Way to go, Tommy.
- All winners can receive
their awards by sending a self-
addressed, postage-paid envelope
to The Michigan Daily.
Herman can be reached
at jaherman@umich.edu.

Porter' named captain

ByNATE SANDALS
DailySports Writer
Huddled on the dais, the Michi-
gan hockey team's departing
seniors tore through a final rendi-
tion of"The Victors."
The speed with which they sang
reflected how quickly their college
careers had come and gone.
"By the time you leave, it's just
abouttoo latetorealizewhatyou've
experienced," Michigan coach Red
Berenson told the players.
The Wolverines' seven seniors
- captain Matt Hunwick, alternate
captain Jason Dest, alternate cap-
tain T.J. Hensick, Tim Cook, Mike
Mayhew, David Rohlfs and Morgan
Ward - were the center of attention
at Saturday's season-ending ban-
quet. But the departing seven were
quick to spread around the credit
for their success in maize and blue.
All Michigan players, coaches
and support staff, as well as family,
friends and members of the Dekers
Club attended the banquet at the
Four Points Sheraton on Saturday
afternoon.
Jack Johnson, who signed with
the Los Angeles Kings after Mich-
igan's season-ending loss to North
Dakota last month, was also in
attendance with his family.
True to form for a team banquet,
the afternoon had both funny and
sad moments as each senior gave a
final speech and the Dekers Club
handed out awards.
T.J. Hensick,whosigned athree-
year contract with the Colorado
Avalanche last week, was the most
tearful senior and unashamedly so.
"This is going to get emotional,"
Hensick said as he poured himself a
glass of water and grabbed a tissue
before starting his speech.
But as much as the event was

Junior Kevin Porter was named captain of next season's Michigan hockey team.

about looking back on four success-
ful years, it was a chance to look
ahead as well.
Berenson announced Kevin
Porter as next year's captain and
also named current sophomores
Andrew Cogliano and Tim Miller
as alternate captains.
Porter, coming off a career-high
58 point season, was also the cap-
tain of the United States team at the
World Junior Championships two
years ago, but he knowsanextseason
will be a new and different experi-
ence.
"It's a tough job; hopefully I can
do well," Porter said.
Finding the balance between
being a friend and being a disci-
plinarian will be the most difficult
part of the adjustment, Porter said.
In the event's other forward-
looking speech, assistant coach
Billy Powers discussed the incom-
ing class of freshman, expected to
number 11. If the banquet made one
thing obvious, it was that if the new
batch of freshmen has just a frac-
tion of the success the departing
seniors had, Michigan hockey will

be in great shape going forward.
Fittingly, seniors won six of the
awards given out by the Dekers
Club.
Not surprisingly, Hensick won
the awards for scoring leader and
most valuable player. Hunwick
won the Vic Heyliger Award as the
team's outstanding defenseman for
the third time inhis career.
Cook, Rohlfs, Porter and fresh-
man Chris Summers also collected
hardware.
The afternoon's final moments
were a celebration of academics
just as much as athletics. One by
one Berenson gave the seniors their
Michigan hockey rings, an award
bestowed exclusively upon gradu-
ating players.
Berenson praised the group for
coming back for their senior year
instead of pursuing professional
careers without receiving a degree.
Based onthe seniors' speechesit
was clear that while the four years
flew by, it was the ride of alifetime.
"Coming to Michigan was the
best decision I've ever made," Hun-
wick said.

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'M' NOTES
Upset bid falls short for rowers
The No. 11 Michigan women's After easily dispatching Lansing on Saturday.
rowing team couldn't quite pull unranked Indiana in the morn- The Buckeyes were victorious
off the major upset it so badly ing, the Wolverines were unable over the rest of the field in the top
wanted this weekend. to defeat No. 3 Ohio State in East three varsity races.
Netters handle the Spartans

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4

The No. 25 Michigan women's
tennis team stormed past Michi-
gan State, 6-1, at the Varsity Ten-
nis Center yesterday.
Sophomore Chisako Sugiyama

and senior Jenny Kuenhn led the Freshman Tania Mahtani and
way for the Wolverines, winning senior Kara Delicata also regis-
as a team in doubles play, and tered wins for the Wolverines,
collecting victories in singles as who improved to 13-5 with the
well. win.

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For the safe
return of Mr.
Cook's bust
missing from
the Martha
Cook Building
since March
2006.


I
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9 4

William Wilson Cook
1858-1930

Call: 734-763-2084
Director, Martha Cook Building