the b-sidel 2B - Thursday, February 22, 2007 The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com ENTERTAINMENT BRIEFS Daily Arts does Spring Break By WHITNEY DIBO Daily Arts Writer Besides the few good souls who are doing Alternative Spring Break or making obligatory visits to their grandparents, most University students will be making a mass exodus to tropi- cal beach destinations this weekend, hoping to escape the arctic winter and drink away the trauma of midterms. Whether it's Bermuda or the Bahamas, Daily Arts is here for you. Here's to keeping you rep- utation intact while you take the booze cruise through Spring Break. 1.Knowwhattoexpect.While aSpringBreak fling may evoke images of "Saved by the Bell" summer romance episodes, in reality, Spring Break hookups are little more than your basic animal instincts. Don't be that kid who tries to romanticize a drunken Spring Break make-out. Avoid anything that resembles "Last night was really special" or any other equally transparent mantra. Everyone knows you're full of shit. 2. Avoid the guy with the video camera. Even though the sketchball trying to videotape your on-the-bar-dancing skit is probably just some random local porn artist, there's always a chance you'll find yourself on "Girls Gone Wild" a few years down the road. Even a brief appear- ance in that most classy of video series can ruin your future career as a corporate lawyer. 3. What happens in Cancun doesn't always stay in Cancun. Bouncing onto the beach with a new person each morning might make you feel This is your brain on Spring Break. like a Spring Break superstar, but be advised that every fellow Michigan vacationee there will be taking notes. What happens in Cancun does not necessarily stay there, so if you're hoping to pre- serve that virginal reputation you've so diligently built over the last four years, either keep your hookup tally to a minimum or discreetly slip out of that hotel room in the wee hours of the morn- ing before anyone wakes up. 4. Watch how much you drink. Drinking until you black out is never a good idea, but at least in Ann Arbor you can stumble down East University Avenue, pass out in a friend's bushes and wake up in the morning embarrassed but essentially unharmed. The streets of Mexico, however, will not be so forgiving. You're more likely goingto wind up either pick-pocketed or at the mercy of foreign government officials. That call home for bail promises to be the worst five minutes of your college years. 5. No, really. The alcohol. Don't be the one who pukes off the side of the cruise boat. Before you start downing shots of tequila, note the sta- bility of the ship. If it looks like it's going to be a choppy night out at sea, do yourself a favor and go easy. 6. Remember that you have to come home with these people eventually. It's just not worth ending a four-year friendship over who gets to hook up with that hottie from Arizona State who happens to be rooming a few doors down the hall. The newfound friends who consti- tute your Spring Break trip may seem important at the time, but remember who you'll be sitting next to on the long plane ride home. 7. It's not going to be 20 below anymore. At the risk of sounding like your mother, wear sunscreen. A tomato-red face and an awkward- ly shaped sunburn covering your back are not attractive spring break souvenirs. They'll also make grinding up on people at the club pretty painful. 8. This trip isn't about luxury. Don't com- plain about the quality of your $600 Spring Break package. What did you expect? Did you really think the food would be gourmet and the rooms would look just like the photos in the bro- chure? One day you'll be able to use your Univer- sity education to land a lucrative job and go on a real vacation, but for now, suck it up and enjoy the inevitable grime of a true college Spring Break. 9. Condoms, people. Condoms. It should go without saying, but try to avoid the Spring Break lovechild. No kid wants to learn that he's a prod- uct of one night of drunken passion somewhere between St. John and St. Thomas, and that's not even to mention the STDs. Take care of yourself. So have fun, be safe and Daily Arts will see you after Spring Break - gonorrhea-free, please. POTENT ALUM Former Michigan football gold- en boy Tom Brady was embroiled in scandal this week as actress Bridget Moyhan- an announced she waspregnant with his child. Moynahan alleg- edly waited to reveal her preg- BRADY nancy, citingthat she "wanted to wait to the very last minute." Us Weekly reported that a friend said Brady was "blindsided" by the announcement, and felt it was unfair of Moynahan to have withheld the information. SPIN-OFF As if one pouty-attractive-doc- tor-show wasn't enough, ABC announced plans earlier this week to create a spin-off program based upon the network's hit medical drama, "Grey's Anatomy." Kate Walsh, who plays Dr. Addison Montgomery-Shepherd, is being given her own series, which is set to debut in May sweeps. BUSINESS Everybody has a price - even the Muppets. This week, The Wein- stein Company purchased semi- nal Muppet characters Elmo, the Cookie Monster, Big Bird and many more. Chairman Harvey Weinstein said he considered it "one of the most important acquisitions I've ever been involved with." But what happens to Kermit and Miss Piggy? They're still controlled by former Weinstein partner Disney. CHARGED Was Sylvester Stallone really as naturally muscular as he seemed YOUTUBE Viacom announced the upcom- ing launch of Joost, their "cool," "crazy" and "hip" new website for videos from the company. Para- mount films and all cable network programs under Viacom will make exclusive content available. Under- standably, Viacom removed all trademarked material off of You- Tube two weeks ago. Let's just hope we don't have to pay for it. Because that's like, stupid. CONTROVERSY This week, Yoko Ono pulled the plug on an upcoming documen- tary about the life of John Len- non. "Working Class Hero" was to debut with candid interviews of Ono and Lennon's former wife Cynthia, who blamed her and John's divorce on drugs and Ono. The London Sun reported Ono was fully supportive of the project up until recent weeks. Ono is yet to make a statement. CANCELLED "Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip" was pulled off the air this week because of sinking ratings. "60," once predicted to be a hit NBC sit- com recently had dropped to its lowest ratings yet of only 6 mil- lion viewers, will be replaced with the new crime drama, "The Black Donnelys." in last year's "Rocky Balboa"? Aus- tralian police suggested otherwise when they stopped Stallone at cus- toms for a routine search, finding packages of what might have been HGH. When authorities came to charge him later at his hotel, wit- nesses said Stallone and his entou- rage were seen throwing items out a window. 0 I I The Auden you never knew 0 234 8 5 29 7 s n By KIMBERLY CHOU Associate Arts Editor For many students, the name W.H. Auden sounds vaguely famil- iar. He's a poet they're assigned to read in those weighty Norton anthologies or whose "Musee deBeauxArts"is most often cited as an example AUDEN of thoughtful, well-wrought ekphrasis. But what even some Auden admirers may not know is that the man considered one of the preemi- nent poets of the 20th century was once a University professor - and that yesterday was the 100th anni- versary of his birth. Born Wystan Hugh Auden, the writer taught English literature at the University from 1941 to 1942. At different times he lived on Brooklyn Street off Packard Street and on Pontiac Trail with Charles Miller. Miller, a Hopwood award winner, would later commit his Auden anecdotes to a book about the writer's years in Ann Arbor. "He taught courses in literature and refused to teach creative writ- ing, which everyone expected him to," said Larry Goldstein, English prof. and editor of the Michigan Quarterly Review. Instead, Auden believedthatforawritertoimprove his craft, it was essential for him to immerse himself in reading. Goldstein said he'd heard of syl- labi with 30 books on them, and another15orsobooksAudenwould list as supplemental reading. "They were very informal class- es," Goldstein continued. "I heard he'd sometimes come in (wearing) bedroom slippers." During his year at the University, the poet would sometimes visit the bars on Pontiac Trail with Miller. "Auden did not like doing his drinking on campus," Goldstein said. "He wanted to be with the proletariats. Auden was in the middle of his most intense Marxist phase" when he was here. He attended parties with Chester Kallman, a fellow poet and Univer- sity MA grad whom he met in 1939. Auden and Kallman would remain romantic and professional partners until the former's death in 1973. Despite his brief time in Ann Arbor, Auden left an impact. He wrote his Christmas Oratorio "For the Time Being" while here ("one of his greatest works, and at least his greatest longer work" accord- ing to Goldstein) and taughtRobert Hayden. "Hayden credited him with changing him from a proletarian to a sophisticated, modernist poet," Goldstein said. Hayden would later become a University prof. himself and the consultant in poetry to the Library of Congress - (the position now known as Poet Laureate Consul- tant). Auden was totally an Ashley's barfly. To teach Auden's work compre- hensively would be difficult, Gold- stein said. As his career spanned the '30s through the '60s, it's dif- ficult to classify him as either mod- ern or contemporary. "It takes a whole course to teach Auden's work," Goldstein said. "Now is certainly the time to do it." 0 NOW IN THEATERS "Pan's Labyrinth" "Venus" "Volver" At the State Theater, At the Michigan Theater; moving At the Michigan Theater Quality 16 and Showcase to the State Theater tomorrow * *** Pedro Almodovar's warm, Peter O'Toole's affable (ifa little layered melodrama returns the Guillermo del Toro's lush andlaedmlor artunth Trely a creepy) turn as a philandering director's female-driven roots and complex masterpiece fie geezer going after his last con- is thrillingly alive with murder, with a gorgeous fantasy outfit, quest is a wry and funny vehicle a possible ghost and all kinds of including fauns, fairies and the for the actor and a fine film in its cross-generational drama. Penel- whole bit. But be advised: the own right, benefiting from the sly ope Cruz is as radiant as ever, but year's most uncompromised vision understatement of director Roger she's finally given something more is also one of its most violent. Michell ("Notting Hill"). to do than look pretty. 0 10 0 A