"P... I . uesday RTSe idigan tilg arts. michigandaily.com artsp age@michigandaily.com 8 . . . .................... . . . . . . . .................. . ...... . . . . .. ... ......................... My sloppy valentines I it's been a relatively tame Febru- ary in the celebrity world. Sure, there was the whole Britney Spears fiasco. The paparazzi caught her driving around with her child on her lap, but was something like that really a surprise? Any students who watched their fair share of "Spring- er-cam" after school (you know who you are) knows what to expect from white trash thrust into the spotlight. The bigger news, at least in our area, revolved around the. buildup to'America's tribute to gluttony and excessive patriotism, Super Bowl XL. During a week in which C-list ! stars of WB shows can Pu be featured as a "celeb- MAI rity" appearance and 90 percent of people at parties are flashing their not-so-truthful VIP bands, plenty of awkward stories are sure to come around. The best was courtesy of over-the-hill drum- mer Tommy Lee. According to various onlookers, Lee spent his day insulting Kid Rock in front of Eminem's entou- rage. Fed up with his badmouthing of their fellow Detroiter, they pro- ceeded to give him a good 'ol beat- down. And honestly, I can't think of a better way to welcome visitors to the Motor City. While Lee might be well known for his home videos, he was upstaged by Lee Tamahori, direc- tor of the James Bond film "Die Another Day." Tamahori did his best Eddie Murphy impression, and mixed it up a little bit by dressing up as a woman and approaching an undercover cop for a little action. We would say this could ruin his reputation, but I think "Along Came a Spider" might have already done the job. Brushes with the law are also becoming a regular part of Scott Stapp's life after he was arrested last week for being too drunk before boarding a plane only months after getting hammered in a hotel lobby and challenging members of 311 to a fight. The saddest part? Both times he was only a few drinks away from JN TT alcohol poisoning. So close to final- ly getting rid of him. British lead singers take the notion of celebrity to an even more absurd level. Pete Doherty, former frontman of The Libertines, got himself into trouble again. With a laundry list of missteps includ- ing heroin convictions, escaping from a Thai detox center, dating Kate Moss and robbing his bandmate's apartment, Doherty told television audiences he was looking forward to a "clean life" after stopping his perpetual ride on the white horse. Only hours later, though, Doherty, the genius that he is, was [IT arrested in the bathroom TOO at a soccer match with a bag of heroin. For any ladies out there looking for a rock- star valentine, the way to a man's heart isn't always through his stom- ach or his pants: Sometimes, it's through a vein in his arm. Sidenote to my people: Don't be upset about Aishwarya Rai getting engaged to Abhishek Bachchan. We had no chance anyway. Get over it. The more surprising drug-related announcement came courtesy of Stephanie Tanner (actress Jodie Sweetin) who announced that she had gone to rehab last year for an addiction to crystal meth. The story originally came out on a random Scandinavian website I saw (I have no clue how I got there), so it may not have been the most truthful of child-star-escapade stories. But her appearance on "Good Morn- ing America" confirmed that she had gone after an intervention with Uncle Jessie, Danny Tanner and Michelle (both of them). So let's look at this. Ashley Olsen snorted too much expensive coke and Jodie Sweetin likely got crystal meth blisters. One of them is worth millions and the other was last seen as a sorority girl on "Yes, Dear." It's Hollywood. Drugs make the person. - Who the fuck are Aishwarya Rai and Abhishek Bachchan? Find out by e-mailing Mattoo at mattoop@umich.edu. 0 Courtey of Wrner Bos. "Johnson Family Vacation 2: Scary White People." By Sarah Schwartz Daily Arts Writer On paper, the plot of "Firewall" sounds like the latest Hollywood money pit driven by marquee names, extrava- gant explosions and, above all, the cookie-cutter action screenplay. Witness Jack Stanfield (Harrison Ford), a computer-security specialist, who explodes when Bill Cox (Paul Bettany, "Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World") threatens to kill his family if Jack doesn't steal $100 million from his employer, a prominent bank. Sure enough, in keeping with the formula, Jack must outwit a man who seems to predict his every move to sur- vive the deadly game. But for Ford and Bettany, finding the realistic component beneath the superficial cliches of the plot was key to making the film. In a time when domestic spying continues to make headlines, the stars wanted to ensure the movie and its implications hit home. "We were asking people to believe this could happen to you," Bettany said. "That's the conceit of how this sort of thriller works. Your family life could be turned upside down. How safe is your identity?" To add to the film's sense of realism, Ford went directly to the source. "I research all of my roles," he said. "For this one, I met with a number of banking professionals and computer-software designers to get a keener idea of the details of their lives." Bettany's preferred method to maintain authenticity was to get into the head of his character. "I tried to look for what I had in common with the character, and what I had in common with the character was he wants $100 million," Bettany joked. "I wouldn't mind $100 million." But don't be fooled by Bettany's sense of humor - he takes his work seriously and wanted to create a believable character for the movie. "I want to give people a good ride in the movie. In order to do that, they need to sort of be fooled into believing that it's sort of real ... I try to produce a villain grounded in some version of reality," he said. Ford, an action icon since the late '70s, said he knows people begin to expect a certain level of entertainment, and he strives to maintain it. "The responsibility that is most important to me is that if people come to see a film because of having had a good experience with me in another film, I want to make sure that the new film they're coming to see is as good as I can make it," Ford said. While he understands that this can lead to pigeonholing, he remains realistic about his role as an actor. "It may be well that people are relating more to what they take to be my persona, but my persona is a dramatic con- struction of its own ... An actor has his own intelligence, imagination and experience to draw upon," Ford said. As the villain, Bettany knows the limitations an action film can impose on its stars. "It's clearly a genre movie, right, so you're playing a villain in a thriller. There are certain notes that you have to hit because it's genre. There are traditions and rules," he said. But those rules don't mean anything goes. "If I sat there stroking a cat with a scar down my face, I think people would kind of be alienated, and that's not what you want," Bettany said. "All you can do is satisfy yourself that you've done the best job you can, that you've brought the material to the finest focus you can obtain - it's as particular and strong as you can make it," Ford added. Tainted love Daily Arts' obligatory top five ways for dealing with Valentine's Day n the name of an obscure Catholic martyr, most of our world will be splattered with a variety of paper hearts, confections and hastily assembled mix-tapes. There are an endless number of trite, trite ways to show your affection and devotion to your Valentine. Of course, you've known about these since primary school. In the name of a fresh and personal February 14th, here's a brief list of activities to get you into a mood of romantic bliss. 'Curious George'just for kids 1 Retreat into a world of drugs Reject love and camp out indoors nursing a bottle of Gin. Proceed to watch both seasons of HBO's majestic, drawn-out drug drama "The Wire." Since you can never watch just one episode of the show and learn anything (let alone catch the endless metaphors for coke dealing), you'll have plenty of excuses to avoid the chirpy couples fluttering outside. 2 Screen poorly chosen films Buy your sweetheart a slew of awk- ward movies. Think "Wild Things," "Amistad," "Cruel Intentions 3" or "Hap- piness." Then try and make out with them during the most stunningly awkward moment (threesome, everything about slavery, the whole movie, child molesta- tion). You'll look totally sensi- tive! Even better, take them to see "Match Point" and showf them that they'll never be as3 gorgeous as Scarlett Johans- son or Jonathan Rhys-Myers. - Evan McGarvey band and daughter dying within one year. Totally puts that little spat you had a week back into per- spective. Or not. 4 Take solace in other pathetic kids Take your sweetie to the cheapest, most enriching place on campus: the Diag. Point out people with hor- rible fashion sense, horrible music taste and general artistic beliefs that clash with your own. Join together in your mutual distaste for the cultural serfs of the University. Write about it constantly. Now you can work for us! 5 Pretend like you care OK, snark attitude aside, there are some wonderful ways to spend your St. Valentine's Day. Go to the museum. Read Keats aloud to your lover. Share coffee and your feelings as snow covers all the pretty buildings. Post on your LiveJournal. Update your Facebook relationship status. Pre- tend like people care about your social life. Go to sleep. By Sarah Schwartz Daily Arts Writer "Curious George" is a kids' movie, completely and unabashedly - and it should be applauded for that above all other things. There are no obscure references or sexual innuendos that Curious will go over children's heads. The most George adult-oriented moment in the movie is when George's image is projected onto At the Showcase the city, as he "climbs" the Empire and Quality 16 State building and swats at airplanes, Universal and a lot of kids probably learned the "King Kong" story over their winter break anyway. And this is where a children's movie should aim. It's tir- ing to see "Shrek," "Shark Tale" or even "Hoodwinked" swimming with so many mature pop-culture allusions that the children's tale gets lost in the process. It's refreshing to see "Curious-George," with its lush 2-D animation and touching tale of an almost father-son relationship, harken- ing back to classic Disney. George, or Monkey as he is called the first half of the movie, meets the Man in the Yellow Hat (Will Ferrell, "Bewitched"), who is searching for a lost artifact that will save his museum. Though always finding some part of the jungle to divert him, George is obviously lonely, so when Ted (The Man in the Yellow Hat has a name!) shows interest in him, George follows him back to the city. Once there, George instigates the usual bouts of mayhem, upsetting the lives of everyone around him. But we soon find that the destruction he causes is for the best. Populating the story are the many supporting characters that add new layers to George's life. Dick Van Dyke, Drew Barrymore, Eugene Levy ("American Pie") and David Cross (TV's "Arrested Development") all lend their voice talent to George's world. Barrymore stands out as the cute teacher who flirts with the bumbling Ted. Cross is perfectly menacing as the villain who plots to sell the museum and build a parking lot in its place. Ferrell infuses Ted with a Courtesy of Universal Awwwwwww, primates! sense of wonder at every new adventure, helping him gain confidence and renew his passion for life. And George is the reason for this change. The playful monkey is essentially a child figure - curious, who has trouble being understood (he doesn't talk in this version) and makes easy mistakes. The filmmakers have trans- formed Ted from the perfect father figure in the books to a comic father/friend - a welcome change from the parental archetypes in many kids' movies - that allows Ted to be human and sometimes overwhelmed with responsibility. Though adding names and a more coherent plot, "Curi- ous George" stays true to the tone and naivete of the books. It even pays homage to the author, H.A. Rey, by naming the boat to Africa after him. These delights aren't comparable to "Shrek" or "Toy Story," but that's not to be held against "George" This is purely a children's film and fittingly crafted with all the deli- cate sweetness only a child can truly appreciate. 3 Put it in perspective Share a moment of literary grace with your lover. Buy them Joan Didion's memoir "The Year of Magical Think- ing." It's all about her hus- Courtesy of Columbia ...,,.. ., - - --._ I - F=0 WW - Excel Explore. Experience. Empower.... ...use yourleadership skills, knowledge and experience lOin the largest student-run arts and programming organization on campus 149 .,'. watkYo Mv p~k@ o adaca4 Now accepting applications for Executive Board positions for 2006-2007 m 1 i I