8A - The Michigan Daily - Monday, November 28, 2005 ARTS Courtesy of Paramount "What am I holding?" Derivative family comedy slips up 0 By Mary Kate Varnau Daily Arts Writer Courtesy of Focus "We're so British, bitches." AUSTEN POWERS COSTUME ROMANCE MAKES FOR REDUNDANT CHARM Piggybacking on the recent suc- cess of similar family-oriented fea- tures, "Yours, Mine & Ours" drew in mil- lions of rugrats and reluctant parents over the holiday weekend. Although the film is a remake of the Yours, Mine & Ours At the Showcase and Quality 16 Paramount By Amanda Andrade Daily Arts Writer Period pieces are too often susceptible to the inauthentic. There's something bodice-bound heroine stand in the rain and poutingly pro- claim her fiery disregard as if she's been up all night study- ing for the GRE - something that feels inescapably unreal. Director Joe Wright's beau- tifully executed new version of Jane Austen's "Pride & Preju- about watching a Pride & Prejudice At the Michigan Theater, Showcase and Quality 16 Focus the second of five sisters all obligated to marry well for their own salvation. Elizabeth, the bookish and free-spirited type, becomes prejudiced against a rich young man named Mr. Darcy (newcomer Matthew MacFadyen) for his prideful demeanor. He falls hard for her spunky personality and the two meander through a few hundred pages of antiquated social commentary to arrive at a wedding. Even for those who never made it to English class, the story is so ingrained in our culture - apart from the 10,000 Austen adaptations, the basic plot is the godmother of the modern romantic comedy - it doesn't bear repeating by someone who has nothing to say. Though screenwriter Deb- orah Moggach is spectacularly competent at adapt- ing Austen's intricately plotted opus to a two-hour form, she doesn't bring anything new. And that's particularly sad considering that just 10 years ago, the BBC released its heralded mini- series version of the novel. Apart from launching Colin Firth as a lake-diving rock star for 40-some- thing British women, the five-hour series remains the pinnacle of Austen recreation. The artistic logic in trying to create another straightforward adapta- tion is lost in the whirl of gossamer gowns and the cacophony of quick, clipped tongues. But despite its inherently flawed inception, the film is remarkably well-made. The cinematography is out- standing, the direction sure-handed, the script light and witty. Problems of scope - the film takes on far too much far too superficially - speak to a desire to please Austen groupies who can project their own connection between Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. And for those who can manufacture the proper emotions at the proper moment, the film is pretty much perfect. Even Knightley, normally feisty and one-dimen- sional, makes for a fitting Elizabeth. She imbues the character with the same irreverent energy as her literary counterpart, though her commitment to exposing Elizabeth's youthful confusion often makes her vapid and giggly. MacFadyen has a world of absence from the screen, but is effectively brooding with what he gets. Those who hate the books are still bound to be less than enraptured sitting through empire-waist gowns hopping around a ballroom and a lot of politely accented Brits acting a little bit distressed. But those who come to the film with familiarity not tainted by old book reports should find it a pleasant diversion in the playful pageantry of it all. 1968 version starring Henry Fonda and Lucille Ball - its part in the "Brady Bunch"-like comedy craze has had critics calling it "Cheaper By the Dozen 1 '/." This punchline doesn't stray far from the truth. After his wife dies, Coast Guard Admiral and aspiring Commandant Frank Beardsley (Dennis Quaid, "The Rookie") moves his eight "military brats" to his childhood hometown. Just a few days later, he's reunited with high school sweetheart, Helen North (Rene Russo, "Two For the Money"), a free-spirited purse designer who, inconceivably, sup- ports her 10 children by creating frilly handbags before marrying into the strictly regimented Beard- sley family. What follows is a 90- minute slapstick battle for territory between the 18 new brothers and sisters. The 2005 version of "Yours, Mine & Ours" only vaguely resembles its predecessor. The plot is essentially the same, although this film takes some liberties with the personali- ties of the main characters, gross- ly exaggerating the laissez-faire, hippy-esque parenting style of the mother. The housekeeping habits of the new family are overplayed as well; a mess is one thing, but in an early scene, the pet pig runs through the front yard gobbling pizza while an army of kids and other family pets slip and slide chasing after it. The new version plays up the silly, physical comedy moments. It focus- es more on the animosity between the children and even adds a subplot where the 18 kids conspire to break up Mom and Dad. The film is packed with "Parent Trap"-style pranks, which may add some appeal for the five-year-old demographic. But for anyone else, the obtuse, obvious humor transforms the Quaid/Russo rendering into the "Yours, Mine & Ours" minus charm. Even so, the writers really crank up the sentiment near the end. Even if viewers are completely turned off by the film's flat, pseudo-come- dic aspects, they'll turn teary-eyed when the saccharine starts flowing. It's an unavoidable reflex; you might sniffle through the last few minutes of the film, though theexpense is bound to be a healthy dose of self- loathing when the lights come up. dice" tries to grime and grit its way into believabil- ity, but slavish devotion to the novel skips over all the dramatic tension. Unfortunately, that excessive faithfulness alone makes the emotional core of this film resonate with exactly the same artificiality as the corsets and petticoats that embalm it. To those who sat through more than a few days of high school lit, the story is familiar: Elizabeth Ben- nett (Keira Knightley, "Pirates of the Caribbean") is .:. . 1 1, - -: ------------n~s - iiU' THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO ,0 The leading science careers website just got better In addition to a newly redesigned website with easier navigation, ScienceCareers.org now includes Next Wave, the essential online careers magazine. Next Wave is packed with features and articles to help advance your science career - all for free. " Take Undergraduate Courses Taught by Distinguished Faculty and Experienced Lecturers " Choose from One of 15 Ancient and Modern Languages: Arabic, American Sign Language, Chinese (Mandarin), French, German, Classical Greek, Modern Hebrew, Italian, Japanese, K'ich'e Maya, Korean, Latin, Russian, Spanish, and Turkish I " Hundreds of job postings " Career tools from Next Wave " Resume/CV Database " Grant Information * Sample Our Business Curriculum: Accounting, Marketing, and Organizational Rehavior li