4 - The Michigan Daily - Tuesday, September 27, 2005 OPINION re Alkir'gau t ailg JASON Z. PESICK Editor in Chief SUHAEL MOMIN SAM SINGER Editorial Page Editors ALISON GO Managing Editor EDITED AND MANAGED BY STUDENTS AT THE UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN SINCE 1890 420 MAYNARD STREET ANN ARBOR, MI 48109 tothedaily@michigandaily.com NOTABLE QUOTABLE Being a conservative Republican in Massachusetts is a bit like being a cattle rancher at a vegetarian convention." - Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, addressing the Mackinac Republican Leadership Conference last Saturday, as reported by The Washington Post on Monday. COHN DALY THF MICHI fN DALY 1 0#10 The clover's greener on the other side EMILY BEAM LOOKING FOR AMERICA From Minnesota to New Mexico, Americans love their lawns. But the uni- form sea of two-inch green stalks that washes over subdivisions across the country is hardly natural or necessary. Lawn care has become a national pastime, and each year, Americans waste billions of dol- lars and their limited free time in a never- ending struggle to maintain the perfect lawn. In the Southwest, lawn maintenance is no less than absurd given that drinking water in often in short supply. And in places like Michigan, where water is plentiful and the climate is temperate, grass is still impractical and time-consuming, and lawn maintenance harms the environment through lawnmower emissions, toxic fertilizers and pesticides. Grass is expensive, it constantly gives way to hardier plants (commonly known as weeds), it's always thirsty and it grows too tall for our tastes. We have shown that we can create a yard greener than nature would permit pretty much anywhere we want - but that doesn't mean we should. Why are Americans in love with their lawns? Heaps of research exist on the psycho- logical and sociological motivations behind lawn care - how the American lawn repre- sents man's triumph over his environment and how humans are evolutionarily inclined to like grass, invoking reminisces of man's early days in the savannahs of East Africa. But even if our instincts are truly calling us to cultivate the land and romp through open fields, they hardly explain how a desire to cultivate turned into a full-blown obsession. It wasn't always like this. Perennial grasses, the types we use on lawns, are not native to the United States; even the celebrated Kentucky bluegrass originates from across the Atlantic, most likely brought over by French missionar- ies in the early 1600s. Neatly manicured lawns started showing up in the mid 1800s, only embraced by the wealthy trying to imitate the European aesthetic of open but ordered spaces - grass was a way of showing off that your family had money to spare. Grass gradually worked its way down to the middle classes, but not on its own - garden- ing associations, lawn-care industries and even the U.S. government shoved the importance of an immaculate lawn down citizens' throats for decades. For instance, in "The Lawn: A History of an American Obsession," Virginia Scott Jenkins highlights that since the turn of the 20th century, "shaming neighbors into decent behavior by example has been a persis- tent theme of horticulture writers and advertis- ers." The U.S. government got involved during World War II to promote lawn care as a worth- while hobby that would help out the cause by keeping citizens at home, saving gas and wear on tires. Jenkins writes, "Homeowners were exported to keep up the home front (literally the front of the house) for the morale of those at home and of loved ones in the service." I'm sure the thought of a fresh-cut lawn await- ing their return was the inspiration that kept American soldiers going. Following the war, all these efforts finally paid off when the mas- sive exodus to cookie-cutter suburbs permit- ted grass to solidify its place in the American psyche. These days, we don't need the government or the lawn-care industry to push us to take care of our lawns - grass is more than well ingrained in American suburbia. But while close-knit communities are replaced with neighbors who have never met, the 1960s image of children playing in the front yard is fading - only accelerated by cranky homeowners who want to keep those damn kids off their front lawn. The uniformly green lawn, so often taken to the extreme, has come to represent the excesses of American society and the triumph of appear- ances over the pragmatic. Rather than spreading yet another bag of fertilizer, that time would be much better spent actually enjoying one's yard, even if it's riddled with a few weeds. There are hundreds of other groundcovers that are superior to grass. Take clover. It's just as soft and almost as durable, it rarely needs mowing and it produces charming lavender flowers each spring. Keeping up a lawn that meets the American standard requires fertiliz- ers and the occasional pesticides, while clover is nitrogen-fixing, improving the soil as it grows. Unfortunately, the resident who decides to try out a "lawn alternative," whether by planting something else or turning his yard into a gar- den or basketball court, can be assured of more than a few angry phone calls. With subdivision associations keeping close watch to make sure that no rebellious resident dares to let his lawn grow a little scraggly, even loosening up a bit may be too much to ask. Beam can be reached at ebeam@umich.edu. VIEWPOINT David Lynch and his new-age cult By HANs KUDER If you missed the opportunity to hear David Lynch speak at the Power Center on Sunday night, don't worry. I can summarize the entire event with one word: bullshit. Lynch is, of course, one of the most prominent film directors of our era. But the genius behind Twin Peaks, Blue Velvet, and Mulholland Drive (among others) didn't come to the Power Center to speak about his film career. Rather, he came as the figurehead of an orga- nization that is billed as an educational revolution but which comes off as a new-age cult. Indeed, he only spoke about his films and creative life when asked, and even then he would quickly change the subject to the aims of his "David Lynch Foun- dation for Consciousness-Based Education and World Peace." Yes, an organization with that name actually exists. Stop reading for a moment to let that sink in. Are you weirded out yet? It gets worse. The entire evening was filled with propaganda. From the DVDs and "informational brochures" given to everyone in the audience to the excessive use of new-age buzzwords (Expanded! Deepened! Unity! Wholeness! Transcendence!) to the down- right creepy tone taken by John Hagelin, quantum physicist extraordinaire, I felt like I was listening to a Sun Myung Moon brainwashing session. Throughout the evening Lynch and his guests - John Hagelin and Fred Travis, both hailing from the cultish-sounding Maharishi Uni- versity of Management - besought the audience to consider an education system built upon the foundation of transcendental meditation. Such a system would, they argued, give students a greater depth of knowledge and bring peace to the world. When asked how he would rigorously test and analyze the implementation and products of such a system, Lynch, of course, changed the subject. But buried within all this unfocused, inarticu- late rhetoric was a statement that sealed the deal on this whole cult thing. Lynch offhandedly men- tioned that he wants to raise $7 billion (that's a B!) to create a permanent organization of about 8,000 meditators to literally "manufacture" world peace. Supposedly, that many enlightened people medi- tating around the clock could pump out enough peace to offset every single act of unspeakable violence and hatred in our world. Forever. I was appalled that the audience wasn't laughing in his face at that point. Admittedly, the three speakers did raise a few very valid, apropos observations. Travis made a good argument for severely questioning the stress, sleep deprivation and drug abuse found at our nation's top universities, and Hagelin took a jab at the Bush administration, which is always appreci- ated. Most of the audience, however, came to hear a marvelous film director speak about creativity. Instead, they received more than an evening's fair share of Grade A BS. Kuder is a Music and Engineering sophomore. LETTERS TO THE EDITOR 0 Think it's tough being gay? Try being conservative To THE DAILY: "Coming out" as a conservative at the Universi- ty is as arduous, if not more so, than coming out as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. In a lopsided microcosm like the University, "left-wing intellec- tuals" have enough clout to persecute and punish conservative thinkers for their beliefs in regard to otherwise subjective matters. College Repub- licans did not attempt to belittle the struggles of the LGBT community throughout the country, but rather tried to parallel their struggle to be open and proud on campus. It sickens me to see someone like Kirk Burkhart (LGBT community faces hatred, conser- vatives don't, 09/26/05) attack such a worthwhile cause as Conservative Coming Out Day. There is no clearer proof that Republicans face an ines- capable social stigma on campus than Burkhart's verbal assault. From a self-professed "tolerant" can o ~c ormm:-t onma: c th+k nil1aatnnc hypocritical opposition at the University than the LGBT community can attest to. Scott Cackowski Engineering sophomore University must not tolerate racism To THE DAILY: I decided to use my precious time to write this letter after reading Monday's Daily (Suspects dispute hate crime, 09/26/05). Firstly, it amused me that the 20-year-old suspect, who was clearly underaged, was playing beer pong and know- ingly drinking. And the fact that he knew he was going to get a minor-in-possession was even more hilarious. Secondly, I do not know whether the urination took place or any racial slurs were used, but these two students might have been drunk; I do not know if I would buy their words. Anyway, I will leave this case to the authorities. nt ;i tavn rP nniimoltythey ohnnird not ren- Should we question our own curriculum? How much has the race and ethnicity require- ment helped students to understand and live with each other without bias and prejudice? Is the University's admission policy really effec- tive in creating an environment where diversity triumphs? Or are we just embracing the term "diversity" without understanding it? Chin-Swan Liew LSA senior Conservative Coming Out Day blown out of proportion To THE DAILY: All right, I've had enough of this. We (conser- vatives) have one small, peaceful event in hopes that some campus conservatives will come out of the woodwork, and we're met with an onslaught of criticism (What Closet?, 09/26/05). Is it honestly that big of a deal? I mean, come on, you blow this entire "coming out day" out of proportion. Are you ranll s enerate tn attack conseArvatives Editorial Board Members: Amy Anspach, Amanda Burns, Whitney Dibo, Jesse Forester, Mara Gay, Jared Goldberg, Eric Jackson, Brian Kelly, Theresa Kennelly, R 3;i Dv -alra, Mrncn Fp uir d R1cAll n Mlrn nwrnnsri .BrianSlarde I . Lauren