4W 0f 0 2B - The Michigan Daily - Thursday, March 10, 2005 The Michigan Daily Featured Artide 8-9B MM auto-neurotic Iwith Alexandra Jones MULUNG OVER MARTHA iAk. 3B Random Student Interview Alex talks about Martha Sewart and fuchsia hair. Do Random Acts of Kindness Students look to brighen up someone s day. PBPALMA Knocking down the language barrier. 11B 12B The Weekend List A guide to Ann Arbor's weekend happenings, WEEKEND Adam Burns: The Wild Side Adam Ponders t1he untamed alE mls ark Bob Hunt: Bright Ideas Son evates toe hghs ad Low K 6 Y A 10AB -grams ,u1g and o d students become pen pals, 14B Black Volunteer Network Service -group aides underrosrntod co u Weekend Entertainment Alexandra Jones takes on M ar tha e rt BOX OFFICE Gross in millions of dollars 1. The Pacifier (30.2) - So it's ... "Suburban Commando" AND "Mr. Nanny?" Sorry Vin, Hulk Hogan is ten times the actor you are. 2. Be Cool (23.5) - Apparently "Ladder 49" wasn't another comeback role for John Travolta. 3. Hitch (12.5) - Finally! A romantic comedy that doesn't end with the lead chasing the girl at the airport. 4. Diary of A Mad Black Woman (12) - Admit it: you didn't hear of this movie until two weeks ago. 5. Million Dollar Baby (8.5) - Winner of four Oscars, including "Best Movie from 2004 That Wasn't a Biopic." 6. Constantine (6) - We've all been to hell with Keanu before (i.e. "Sweet November," "Chain Reaction," "The Replacements," etc.) 7. Cursed (3.8) - The title aptly describes the careers of all the actors in this movie. 8. Man of the House (3.5)-Well, at least this one doesn't have Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Chevy Chase or Norm from "Cheers." 9. Because of Winn-Dixie (3.4) - You know what they say: Never work with children, animals or Jeff Daniels. 10. The Jacket (2.7) - You'll probably need one to cover your eyes from this crap. D uing Spring Break while we 11 a m. and, harlyconscious, gape at cor is nothing if not comprehensive. carefree students were vaca- Martha playing with herchow chows-The News section brings up the most ti in 'xot, nonartic (PawePaw and ChimChia -duh) and recent Yahoo! News articles about her locales, mooching our parents or discussing soil acidity with various - and just about anyone connected sleeping through another week in Annexperts. I'd IotA at her kitchen, with its with her. One item concerns "Inside Arbor,t Stewartwas released walls studded with Revolutionary War. Editio" host Deborah Norville, who from prison. I knew it was official era copper cake molds and doube con-.will host the show from Marthia's Long when my mother brought home a wad vection ovens and rows of preserves Island home while experiencing a 24- of .Martha's precious brand name dish lining the shelves and wishIhad that hour house arrest. She'll even wear an towels from Kmart and - as if Ms. kitchen and that I could afford such ankle bracelet just like the one used Stewart's iron-willed primness was an nice ingredients and cool gadgets and to monitor our Ms. Stewart. Because airborne contagion - told me not to a beautiful shiny stand mixer. being stuck in the home ofta super-rich get them "dirty.".So I wonder: Why save Martha? worldwide celebrity for a whole damn This column has borne both my While she stood trial for lying under day must really make you value your secret media-related confessions oath about insider trading, a movement freedom. before, and this week won't be any dif- sprung up to support her: SaveMartha. Whatever their motivation, the ferent: I'm sort of fascinated by Martha com has provided an outlet for Martha's SaveMartha.com supporters have it Stewart. fans to express their admiration for and all wrong. Sure, she's a self-made, Not in the "What an admirable devotion to their unjustly indicted and wildly successful businesswoman, female role model" kind of way, or incarcerated champion. Supporters she's divorced and she makes a mean even in the "How does she make her can host a Save Martha party, where cucumber salad. But the only good that pie crust so flaky and delicious?" kind they can simultaneously "Celebrate can come out of Stewart's exposure of way, but in the "Oh my god, her anal the release of Martha Stewart and the and her rabid following will be activ- perfectionism and onscreen personality beginning of her amazing comeback' ism on Martha's part. On her web- are utterly appalling, butI sort of wishI and "Show off your hosting skills." site, marthastewart.com, she writes, could make my very own copper-lined The site also encouraged people to "Someday, I hope to have the chance window boxes and bake a perfect apri- welcome Martha back by thronging to talk more about ... the extraordinary cot tart" way. I see Martha as a total her March 6 release from prison in people I'have met here, and all that I whackjob who's somehow convinced Alderson, West Virginia, right next to have learned. I can tell you now that I Americans that her advice is foolproof, a call for photos of your work if you've feel very fortunate to have had a family her recipes delicious and her empire "Martha-ized your home, office or who nurtured me, the advantage of an indestructible, pets." Visitors to the site are exhorted excellent education, and the opportuni- That image is not entirely her fault, to be "Martha Evangelizers" by telling ty to pursue the American dream ... I of course: Martha's perfectionism and friends about the website and Martha's will never forget the friends I met here, emphasis on homemaking, despite second coming. all that they have done to help medur- her status as the CEO of a multimil- Okay, okay, I'm a homemaker on ing these five months, their children, lion dollar company, causes me to the inside, and that's why I'm envious and the stories they have told me." If associate her with other conservative of Martha's stranglehold on American Martha starts stumping for prison values. It's like if Ann Coulter wasn't domesticity. Understandable, right? reform, I aight start liking her ideas, such a fucking loudmouth lunatic and So who the hell are the people behind not just that gorgeous kitchen. instead focused her energy on setting Save>Marth .com - middle-aged an impeccable Thanksgiving table. housewives? Some new feminist spIn- Alexandra will be spending her Which actually wouldn't bother me ter group? Female executives, busi weekend making a lovely household all that much. nesswomen and CEOs? accessory out ofsome tree bark and I remember the rare summer morn- Based on the site design, I'm betting dandelions. E-mail her with more style ings when I'd roll out of bed before on the first option - but SaveMartha. tipsat alajo@umich edi4. dpha Phi Omega he pful spin or Greek life, 15B Michigan Reach Out! Science and service come together Motor Meals Students deliver food to the homebound. " Summer Programs * University Credit r ae t/r {p/cr&V, Al MAGAZINE . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . Uff DATE/TIME NOISE REDUCTION Daily Arts Mix Tape DATE/TINE NOISE REDUCTION ChiAe rgentina 4ocarnbio The Department of Communication Studies presents a Howard R. Marsh lecture by JAMES FALLOWS National Correspondent, The Atlantic Monthly 1. You Ain't The First - Guns Writers: Emily Fellows, Josh Holman, Emily Liu, Jenny Mahn, Dan Marchese, Kathryn Rice, Amanda Shapin, C.C. Song Photo Editor: Ali Olsen Photographers: Trevor Campbell, Glenn Getty, Shubra Ohri, Eugene Robertson, Peter Schottenfels Cover Photo: Ali Olsen Arts Editors: Adam Rottenberg, Managing Editor Associate Editors: Alexandra Jones, Melissa Runstrom Managing Editor: Alison Go Editor in Chid:iason% Z)esick&. a ., What always amazed me about the Beatles, aside from the consistent high quality of their songs, was the incredible rate at which they put them out It seemed they were releasing progressive singles daily. Side A is dedicated to those like the Beatles, who managed to pump out classics consistently. On the Alpside are artists who seem to talk about their releases every three weeks but take years to put out their crap py albums (except Ja Rule, whos on here just because he's a bitch.) 1. Paperback Writer - The Beatles, 2. Keep on Chooglin' - Creedence Clearwater Revival 3 .tNight Rally - Elvis Costelo 4. If Not For You - Bob "ylan 5. Rattled by the Rush - Pavement 6. Venus de Mile - Miles Davis 7. Naima - John Coltrane 8. Liquid Swords - Ghost- face Killah 9. ALL CAPS - MF Doom 10. Encore - Jay-Z 1. You ,Ain't The First -- Guns .n Roses 2. Hash Pipe - Weezer 3. Metalingus - Alter Bridge 4. Wish - Nine Inch Nails 5. New Tattoo - Motley Crue 6. Self Righteous - Third Eye Blind 7. The Rising - Bruce Spring- Steen 8. Morning Dew - Robert Plant 9. Envy - Fat Joe 10. So Much Pain - Ja Rule , Think you I The Campus Informa Applications are availat two locations-in the M Commons. Appl Friday, I C www.umlch.edulinfc --MIS Tuesday, March 15, 2005, 4:00 pm - 7:00 pm Forum Hall, Palmer Commons 100 Washtenaw Ave. /Ann Arbor, MI 48109-2218 Please see www.umich.edu/~palmcomm/for directions Contact the Department of Communication Studies Ve9 I' .406t4V42 JfOT mete inHform tion. -L _______________________