V V V U 0 . -W -W - w w The Michigan Daily - WeekendMlagazine 14B -The Michigan Daily - WeekendIMagazine - Thursday, October 30, 2003 UE 4 Most obvious album name ever. BiuLLoARD TOP 10' 1. Measure of a Man, Clay Aiken - Clay has to know how bad his record title sounds. It's like one of the '50s melodramas when you're not allowed to talk about what things really mean.. 2. As Time Goes By Great American Songbook: Vol. II, Rod Stewart - Even writing the album's complete name is too much press for "Rod the Bod." 3. The Very Best of the Eagles, Eagles - So hell freezes over and then you release your "Best of." That's life in the fast lane. 4. Speakerboxxx/The Love Below, OutKast - Dre has a 6- year-old son named Seven. He's so cool. S. Chicken-N-Beer, Ludacds - Ludacris deserves an award for moving society past blind-eyed stereotypes. 6. Loon, Loon - Who the hell is Loon? Apparently everyone who knows the answer bought the CD. 7. Life for Rent, Dido - Cute, British and still has Eminem to thank for her being on the Billboard Top 10, 8. Hard Jagged Edge - So what's so Hard about it? 9. The Movie Album, Barbra Streisand - Hey, as long as she never makes another movie, she can sing about them all the time. 10. Everything to Everyone, Barenakd Ladies - The kind of group name that gets you real- ly excited until you see what they actually look like. Not naked. Not ladies. WEEKEND ENTERTAINMENT TODD WEISER- WAITING FOR PORMA "TAXI DRIVER' CONFESSIONS F~or the past year, I have looked forward to this Friday team doing something current Detroit Lions Wide night with an anticipation only equaled by your Receivers Coach Bobby Williams could never obtain from FLbuddy Eric's yearlong craving for another install- them: effort. John L. Smith may look deceptively foolish ment of "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy. Halloween cos- to State's Big Ten competitors, but with a party in the mid- tumes for me usually result from split-second decisions. A die, GI on the sides hairdo, how stupid will I look to the quick run to the MSU bookstore for a Spartan Alumni T- green and white? shirt and those fake 'S' tattoos, followed by a trip to the Now, just like two years ago when I witnessed that dollar store for a janitor's mop and barn! Todd is now a phantom second, I've got upper deck tickets at Spartan Michigan State graduate. Stadium (Thank you Michigan Ticket Office). But those This year was supposed to be different. I figured it out a Spartans don't tailgate like us Wolverines. Nope, they feel long time ago and knew everything necessary for the per- the need to get up at two in the mornin' to drive to the ten- fect costume. Cowboy boots? Check. White dress shirt with nis courts (the tennis courts?) to secure a spot and then one ripped sleeve? Check. Marines jacket? Check. (Okay, commence drinking. Yes it's true that many of these same mine is an Army jacket, but it's close enough.) Toy gun? tailgaters don't go to the game, or even watch it for that Check. Shaving a Mohawk? Check? matter, but, with a noon start time and an actual goal of I want to be Travis Bickle (Robert DeNiro) from Martin watching the contest, this limits all of my Friday night Scosese's 1976 masterpiece of loneliness and hatred "Taxi action (not that kind of action, sicko). Driver." Travis was all of 26 when he shaved his head. As of now, Ann Arbor seems to be offering very little in Taunted as "Cowboy" many times in the film, Travis the Halloween party department so maybe a fright night in makes the Native American hairstyle change when he's EL is not such a bad idea. However, the Travis Bickle cos- finally ready to take some action against the filth of New tume lends itself to a certain film knowledge found more York that he so despises. The assassination of a prevalent in Treetown than Spartyville. Also, what's the fun Presidential candidate is his initial goal, but the killing of of dressing up for people you don't even know? a pimp and a mob boss will do. I am 22.I want to shave my head. Why was it so easy for Random MSU student: Oh man, Bobby DeNiro in Travis but so hard for me? "Taxi Driver!!" (laughing)You talkin' to me, you talkin' to There are various reasons why I am now having second me thoughts about the follicle butchering, and I'm not sure if Me: Thanks, guy I don't know and will never in my life any of them are good reasons. If I don't make the cut, am meet again. I just as weak as Travis feels throughout most of "Taxi Driver?" Sure, you can work up a case for Mr. Bickle This would be followed by my mimicking of DeNiro (as being certifiably crazy, but he did take some action final- Bickle)in the films final moments: blood-soaked hand lift- ly. And it worked out for him in the end (being labeled a ed to my head, imitating a gun, pulling the trigger. hero in thepapers, returning a young prostitute to her The real motivation for my hesitation, and thereason I've home in New Jersey, a beautiful girl in the semen-snaked tried so far to avoid, is peer pressure. I've got no support. backseat of his taxi). Eywre Iturn get."Nn, Todd. Don't shave your head!" If oy Halloween were o a Wdsdayor ap Thursday, My friendss h.ey Jake. It's like a broken, this decisionwould be sa khating rerd, spired, and Halloween is on a Friday. And not just any Is peer.fssure really that dominant a force? There's no Fiday; o, it's gotta be the Friday before theimiversity's way a _these people really find my current style all that biggest football game of the year - Michigan State. Fucamazing anyway, they just dislike the shocking. the Bukeyes! Even if we beat them this year OSUf ns will I'm bored as hell and I don't want to take it anymore. A wave their National amoshp rings in ourfaces. No little Mohawk never killed anyone. matter what we do, they're he b r team.. Of course, I could always do what DeNiro did. not shave MSU on the other hand is a question mark. We never myhead,and wear a bald-cap and fur instead.But what's the expected them to bethis good. Htell, look at their coach..fin in that, Mr. Scorsese? What's the fun in that? He sounds like a bumbling tool, yet he's somehow got his - GIMling experts, please provide Todd with allour quarterback clean (and once again NFL bound) and his hairsoying expertise at hweiser@num ch.edu ME Ca I I I I ng al ro t h r Court 'y '" oColumb I'm the king of Meyer. WEEKEND BOX OFFICE Gross in millions of dollars 1. Scary Movie 3 (48.1) - Wait $48 million? AHHHHHHH- HHHHHHHHHHHHH! Now, moving on ... ~- 2. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (14.4) - Org inally, it was called "Leatherface: The Joan Rivers Story." 3. Radio (13.3) - Cuba needs to be invaded. Right NOW! 4. Runaway Jury (8.4) - Really, the only thing worse than a John Grisham book might be a John Grisham movie. 5. Mystic River (7.7) - Sean Penn just keeps on getting better and better at playing himself. 6. The School of Rock (6.5) - Jack Black makes big-boned people feel like they can accom- plish anything. Even shredding the guitar. 7. Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (6.3) - If OT's film is not in the top 10 next week, then fuck Bill, I'm taking my own life. 8. Good Boy! (5.0) - Can't wait for the sequel, "Big Boys" Hmm, BigB y. Intolera le Cruelty (3.6) - You mean the American public won't "get" a modern screwball comedy. Shocking! 10. Under the Tluscan (2.2) - After careful aesthetic analysis I've decided Diane Lane was bet- ter in "Unfaithful." You know, because she was like naked and stuff in the other movie. ith the vibrant fiery-toned Ann Arbor leaves strewn more on the ground than in the trees, it is clear that one of college students' most beloved holidays is fast approaching. Halloween, that sacred pagan holiday of dressing up like a mon- ster and drinking to excess, arrives tomorrow in Ann Arbor, and while the Michigan campus does not draw over 65,000 trick-or-treaters like the University of North Carolina, which claims one of the biggest Halloween parties in the nation, chilly Ann Arbor still provides students with an opportunity to express themselves, and their inner demon -or angel --through costume. For those of you who still haven't decided on what costume to wear, or who are still looking for that one last touch - the coup de grace - that will set you apart, or at least make people notice you, there are a few sim- ple guidelines to bear in mind. These are not overly childish suggestions like those doled out from the University a few weeks ago, guaranteed to get you laughed out of even a pre-school Halloween party, but rather a few simple maxims you should bear in mind while designing your costume to fit into any baccha- nal celebration. First and foremost among these guidelines is that everyone should feel free to express the inner slut inside of them. Halloween is an excuse to mask oneself and unleash all carnal lusts, regard- less if one is actually wearing a mask. Anyone who has ever seen a college-aged girl walking around in the freezing cold with a short black mini skirt and claiming to be a "pussy cat," has seen this first hand. The slutty pussy cat could be the most popular costume for young women, but it is not the only option afforded to those who want to dress a little more risque than usual. After all, what is Halloween good for if not for an excuse to dress in the way you normally cannot? The obviousness of the slutty devil or the inher- ent sluttiness of the succubus and incubus cannot be overlooked, but how about bending the roles a little this Halloween and whipping out the ol' slut- I hedonists FOREST CASEY/Daily A great costume idea, the slutty nun. ty angel costume with the siren-song harp that leads certain lucky souls to heaven? Consider how many naked or scantily clad angels Western art has provided. Aside from these spiritual costumes, you and your friends could go out as a group of slutty Girl Scouts or Boy Scouts, replete with a badolier of slutty merit badges rewarding nefari- ous activities. Think of all the fun you can have with a "Leave No Trace: Outdoor Ethics" or "Snorkling" badge, both offered by the Boy Scouts of America. While "slutty" is by far the most prevalent adjective attached to costumes on All Hallow's Eve, running a close second has to be "drunk." In fact, the two often go hand in hand, with such examples like a slutty drunk Snow White or Pocahontas. Actually, if you follow these guidelines, fairy tale characters make just as good costumes as they did when you were only a few hands high. Disney has provided us with a healthy portion of characters that can easily be adapted to fit the level of drunkeness appro- priate for the holiday. If you live with six other roommates you could always go as the seven drunk dwarves. While the drunken frat boy cos- tume is only sometimes intentional, and mostly by those not involved in the fraternity system, you can keep with the Greek theme and go as a drunken toga-toting Greek god - Dionysus and the rest of the Pantheon would be proud. Of course, if the prospect of being scantily clad and inebriated on the frigid Ann Arbor streets is not one you find overly appealing, you can always dress up as a pretty pink princess or some other tame costume. Just because you are free to unleash the slut inside yourself, doesn't mean that you have to. Halloween affords people the opportunity to break out of their everyday routine and have a good time. The tradition of dressing up and acting foolish is as much a part of Halloween as watch- ing fireworks and parades on the Fourth of July. Halloween is the ultimate game of pretend, and should be enjoyed as such. In honor of indulging in sultry sweets and in gratitude to our freedom of expression, Weekend Magazine wishes you a safe and happy Halloween. - Charles Paradis and Rebecca Ramsey NEWS IN ENTERTAINMENT HOT OR NOT? RUN PuF, RUN! - Sean "P. Diddy" Combs will run in the New York City Marathon - sore knee and all, reported e Associated Press. His trainer, Mark Jenkins, expects the 33-year-old hip-hop mogul to finish Sunday's 26.2-mile race. Jenkins will run alongside Combs, who is competing to raise money for charity. Jenkins has made recent headlines since his former girlfriend sued him Monday for $6 million for years of abuse. While Jenkins and his lawyer have no comment on the lawsuit, Jenkins was excited to make a millionaire mogul run as fast as he could. Combs hurt his knee during training but Jenkins said Tuesday, "Even if he has ''o crawl, he is going to finish." A few weeks ago, Combs and Jenkins ran 20 miles through Harlem and the Bronx with former marathon star Alberto Salazar. "People were screaming, 'Puffy keep going!"' said Jenkins. Yes, indeed. Faster Puffy. Run from the maniacal "celebrity fitness drill master." I JUST WANT BANG, BANG, BANG - The Associated Press reported Wednesday that the Netherlands, where all things great like prostitution and marijuana are legal, has drastically reduced the amount of erotic television programming in the last year. Only the Holland Media Group, a Dutch company that has continued with erotic programming, said it's going to stick with its "Erotic on Five" show, featuring bare torsos and but- tocks, but no explicit sex. Things are thankfully not so in Britain, where recent years have seen a rise in programming with sexual con- tent, while Germany and France con- tinue to broadcast erotic television pro- gramming in the late evening. FOREST CASEY/Daily An integral part of any costume. I I I v v's i. .. '. S : ._ _ , " # Q'. . ' P ' e3 5 . .!e " 4 ~ .' ~ .4 .4. . 44, 444 k44~'4 4 44 44.. , 44 ' . . 'tt. * t t.44 74 t"4744.4., .444 44 4.' *4t4a *A.. A. 4 4444.4447444 4444.'.. 4>44.4.'.'. 2744 .tt. 74 4 44m4:..1 a . S"4 ° # d44 4 4 -.. ... 4s 4 4 4 4 . :°-