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2B - The Michigan Daily - Weekend Maazine - Thursday, October 17, 2002
Random student celebrating his birthday early
The Michigan Daily - Weekend Magazie
Saturday
By Neal Pals
Daily Arts Writer
The Michigan Daily: Hola ... is Tom
around?
Random: Hold on, lemme check ...
TOMMY! Phone! ... Hello?
TMD: Hey! I'm with The Michigan
Daily; you've been selected to participate
in this week's Random Student Interview.
R: That's great.
TMD: So, are you ready for a knee-
slapping good time?
R: Yeah, I always love knee-slapping
good times.
TMD: Excellent. Would you rather be
a rapscallion or a scalawag?
R: A scalawag. They seem a lot cooler.
TMD: What have you done for break?
R: Gone out and drank. My birthday is
coming up, so I've been celebrating early.
TMD: Well, good for you. When was
the last time you were in love?
R: Umm, last Saturday; my girlfriend
was in town.
TMD: Does that make you the captain
of her heart?
R: Sure.
TMD: Were you aware of this week-
end's Divestment Conference?
R: I was, but I don't really know much
about it, except for what came out in the
paper. Isn't it about some kind of invest-
I.
As an engineer in
the U.S. Air Force,
ment in Israel?
TMD: It's actually "divestment." It's a
pretty controversial issue.
R: Oh right, yeah, I guess I'm pro-
divestment if it benefits suppressed people.
TMD: Have you ever had trouble
divesting yourself from a toilet?
R: Ha ha ha. Yes, a couple of times.
TMD: What is your favorite genre of
music?
R: I listen to all kinds of music. But
right now, it would be Rap and R&B.
TMD: What's your favorite genre of
pornography?
R: Big Booby porn.
TMD: Do you know what "mundun-
gus" means?
R: No clue.
TMD: What do you think it means?
R: Maybe it's like some kind of disease?
TMD: What is your absolute worst fear?
R: A losing football season.
TMD: Have you ever not remembered
an entire evening?
R: Normally, things are OK at the
start, but they get hazy the more I drink.
But I always remember getting home.
TMD: That's good. Do you see any
virtues in binge drinking?
R: Yeah ... you get drunk way faster,
people are more entertaining and far
more attractive.
TMD: What is the worst thing you can
possibly take a shot of?
R: Bile. It's nasty stuff.
TMD: I agree. Do you think insanity
can be cool?
R: No, not really. It can make you do
some fucked up things.
TMD: What is your favorite synonym
for "cool?"
R: Awesome.
TMD: Awesome. What is the last
thing that made you cry?
R: Definitely the holding call that
brought us a loss at Notre Dame.
TMD: Ah, yes. A tragedy. What is the
most beautiful thing you have ever seen?
R: That website where this chick takes
off her shirt when you run the mouse over
her body. But I lost the link to it.
TMD: Probably for the best; Can't
have that around the ole ball and chain.
Do you enjoy taking long walks along the
beach?
R: Nah, I'd rather be in the water. I
guess I like walking through water.
TMD: Hmm, that sounds hard. But I
guess it's cool.
If you could travel through time, what
period would you visit?
R: Ancient Rome. And I'd bring
back lots of stuff so people would
think I was cool.
TMD: Would you be a gladiator?
R: No, I'd get my ass kicked.
TMD: Do you know what chaos
theory is?
R: Nope. But the dude from "Jurassic
Park" talked about it a lot.
TMD: Maybe you should watch that
movie again, then.
Have you ever sniffed anyone's under-
pants before?
R: No way, that's really weird. I've
sniffed my own boxers to see if I can wear
them again, but sniffing someone else's
underwear is just sketchy.
TMD: If you were stranded on an
island, who would you rather have around:
Your best friend or a buxom babe from
Scandinavia?
R: The babe.
TMD: Okay, well, I think we're done
here. Check the paper later this week ...
this interview will be in it.
R: For real? All right! Go Blue!
TMD: Indeed. Thanks for your coop-
eration and godspeed.
CAMPUS CINEMA
Late Marriage See Friday. Michigan
Theater 4:30, 7 & 9:30 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Thursday. State
Theater 2:30, 4:45, 7 & 9:15 p.m.
Scream Wes Craven inspired a.
decade of bad ripoffs with one good
satire. State Theater Midnight
Secretary See Thursday. State
Theater 2:45, 5, 7:15, 9:30 & 11:45
p.m.
MUSIC
Funktelligence with Athletic Mic
League Ahhh we want the funk. Got
bave the funk. Ahhh we need the
funk. Give us the funk. GC 4ever.
Blind Pig, 208 S. First St., 10 p.m.
$6 ($8 under 21). 996-8588.
Ann Arbor Symphony Orchestra Oh
man their playing Brahm's
"Serenade No. 1". Everybody knows
that is like, totally the easiest one.
Plus you know the show will rock
when there is a pre-concert lecture
by Maestro Arie Lipsky! Michigan
Theater, 8 p.m. $18-$33. 668-8463.
Frequency The Necto. 516 E.
Liberty St., 9 p.m. $5 ($8 under 21).
994-5835
THEA TER
Medea See Thursday, 2 p.m. and 8
p.m.
The SpIrit House See Thursday, 8
p.m., 27.50.
Staged Readings Basement Arts
will be performing short works of
theatre. These fresh and innovative
performances are written and
directed by students. Time and
place TBA, Free. 764-6800.
Sun day
Brian Jacques Book Signing &
Presentation Jacques introduces
and signs copies of "Triss," the
15th book in his Redwall series of
fantasy books. 2 p.m. Nicola's
Books, 2513 Jackson. Free. 662-
4110.
Feed the Poets Poetry reading
featuring poets from the winter
2002 issue of The Huron River
Review, a journal published by
Washtenaw Community College.
Open mic readers interspersed
with featured readers. 2 p.m.
(doors at 1:30 p.m.) Del Rio Bar,
122.W. Washington. Free. 761-
2530.
CAMPUS CINEMA
Late Marriage See Friday. Michigan
Theater 3:30, 6 & 8:30 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Thursday. State
Theater 2:30, 4:45, 7 & 9:15 p.m.
Secretary See Thursday. State
Theater 2:45, 5, 7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
MUSIC.
Takacs Quartet and Garrick
Ohlsson One of the world's great-
est Quartets teams up with pianist
and UMS Distinguished Artist
Award recipient, Garrick Ohlsson,
to open and close UMS's 40th
annual Chamber Arts Series. They
will be performing pieces by
Beethoven, Ravel and Dohnanyi.
7p.m., Rackham Auditorium, 915
East Washington, $20-28; 764-
2538.
Voodoo Lighthouse If you insist on
breaking the Sabbath, it might as
well be with these dudes. Blind
Pig, 208 S. First St., 10 p.m. $5.
996-8588.
Riders in the Sky That song scared
the living crap out of me when I
was a kid. Damn country-western
swing to hell. The Ark, 36 . Main
St. 3 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. $10-
$17.50. 761 1451
THEATER
Weren't you that stupid cop on "Law and Order?"
there's
no telling what
yo U work on.
(Seriously, we can't tell you.)
p.m.
The Spirit House See Thursday, 2
p.m. and 7 p.m., $22.50.
A LTERNA TIVES
Degas and the Dance Don't miss
this rare opportunity to experience
the power and passion of dance as
depicted by one of the great mas-
ters of Impressionism, Edgar
Degas. 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., The
Detroit Institute of Arts, 5200
Woodward Avenue, Detroit,
$11.50-21.50; 313-833-7900.
Monday
lives beneath the ocean and that's
where I will be will be, I'm going see
the cow beneath the sea. Michigan
Theater, 7:30 p.m. $23. 668-8463.
Linda Thompson Ms. Thompson hasn't
toured or recorded in 17 years. But
then again neither has Elvis and he ha
a number one album a few weeks ago
This music stuff is so easy. The Ark, 3
S. Main St. 8p.m. $26. 7611451
The Paul Keller Orchestra When we sa
orchestra we mean two monkeys
and... crap I used that one already.
Damn it. The Firefly Club, 207 S.
Ashley St. 9 p.m. $5. 665-9090.
Tuesds
BOOKS
.United States Air Force applied technology is years ahead
of what you'll touch in the private sector, and as a new
engineer you'll likely be involved at the ground level of new
and sometimes classified developments. You'll begin leading
and managing within this highly respected group from day
one. Find out what's waiting behind the scenes for you in
the Air Force today. To request more information, call
1-800-423-USAF or log on to airforce.com.
® f
U.S. AIR FORCE
CROSS INTO THE BLUE
Graduate School
Information Fair
Monday, October 21, 2002
11:00am - 3:00pm
its Michigan Union
Meet with graduate schools from across the
country.
Explore options, collect applications, ask
ND/Do aboutfinancial aid.
Visit The Career Center's homepage for a list
of schools and programs scheduled to attend.
Join our new email group for timely tips on
1s the graduate school application process.
Graduate School: Preparing for Success
(September 16-November 18).
For more information, contact
The Career Center * Division of Student Affairs
3200 Student Activities Building " www.careercenterumich.edu
(734)764-7460
BOOKS Medea See Thursday, 2 p.m. and 8
'Ann Arbor Reads' Book Selection
Meeting A new community project
(organized jointly by the U-M Life
Sciences, Values & Society Program
and Shaman Drum Bookshop) in which
one book will be selected for the entire
community to read. The three finalists
are "Abraham Lincoln's DNA and other
Adventures in Genetics" by Philip Reilly;
"Beggars in Spain" by Nancy Kress and
"Frankenstein" by Mary Shelley. 6:45
p.m. Ann Arbor District Library, 343 S.
Fifth Ave. Free. 936-2575.
Deborah Blum Reads Blum reads from
her book; "Love at Goon Park: Harry
Harlow and the Science of Affection." 8
p.m. Shaman Drum Bookshop, 315 S.
State. Free. 662-7407.
CAMPUS CINEMA
Late Marriage See Friday. Michigan
Theater 7 & 9:15 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Thursday. State
Theater 7 & 9:15 p.m.
Secretary See Thursday. State Theater
7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
MUSIC
They Might Be Giants I'm going down
to cow town, a cow's a friend to me,
BOOKS
John Steinbeck: American Writer
Steinbeck scholar Robert DeMott dis-
cusses "John Steinbeck: American
Writer," in celebration of the Steinbec
Centennial. 7 p.m. Ann Arbor District
Library, 343 S. Fifth Ave. Free. 327-
4200.
CAMPUS CINEMA
Bonjour Kathrin Part of the German Fil
Series. Michigan Theater 7:15 p.m.
Late Marriage See Friday. MichigE
Theater 7 & 9:15 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Thursday. Stat
Theater 7 & 9:15 p.m.
Secret Ballot An Iranian film about t'
chaotic election process in Iran, and
lot more. Michigan Theater 9:30 p.m.
Secretary See Thursday. State Theat
7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
MUSIC
The Ron Brooks Trio I'm not afraid of
Ron. Only of what he might do if he
ever starts reading the List. Bird of
Paradise, 312 S. Main St., 9 p.m. $5.
662-8310.
courtesy of Screen Gems
(Insert tough sounding "Pulp Fiction" reference here.)