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The Michigan Daily - Weekend Magazin
2B - The Michigan Daily - Weekend Magazine - Thursday, October 3, 2002
Random students have absolutely no clue
Saturday
$27.50 for seniors. $24.
Imaginary Invalid See.Thursday.
Molly Sweeny See Thursday. 7 p.m.
By Neal Pas
Daily Arts Writer
The Michigan Daily: Hi, may I
please speak with Elizabeth?
Random: Hold on, let me get her...
Hi. This is Elizabeth.
TMD: Hello, you've been selected to
participate in this week's Michigan
Daily Random Student Interview.
R: Is that the newspaper?
TMD: Uh, yeah. Do you accept?
R: Sure.
TMD: OK, well, then let's get started.
Do you consider yourself a superstar?
R: No, not really.
TMD: Really? You sound like a
superstar.
R: Nah, I'm just one of the girls.
TMD: One of which girls?
R: My friends.
TMD: Oh. What's your major?
R: I'm an engineer.
TMD: Aw, I'm sorry to hear it.
R: Well, I'll be switching to LSA
soon.
TMD: Good to hear it.
Tell me what you remember about
your birth.
R: Absolutely nothing. No one
remembers their own birth!
TMD: Do you have a major memory
disorder or something? I remember
coming out of the womb just fine.
R: Really? Huh. Sorry, I'm blonde.
But I know most people I know don't
remember being born.
TMD: Have you ever been trainspot-
ting?
R: Can't say that I have.
TMD: Ever gone picking for dingle-
berries?
R: Nope. I've never heard of those.
TMD: Do you like berries in gener-
al?
R: Yeah, they taste pretty sweet.
TM): Then you should go dingleber-
ry picking. In the springtime.
Have you ever eaten sushi off a naked
body?
R: What kind of questions are these?
This is a pretty lame prank.
TMD: See, you're wrong there. This
interview is for the Daily.
R: Whatever you say.
TMD: Yeah, that's generally how it
3
goes.. So, back to this sushi ...
R: I've actually never had sushi.
TMD: Do you think Ann Arbor is a
whore?
R: No.
TMD: What city do you see as being
a whore?
R: Las Vegas.
TMD: Ah, yes, Vegas is a big dirty
whore, indeed.
Do you have a tattoo?
R:Yup.
TMD: Very cool. Me too. What's
yours of?
R: A butterfly on my lower back.
TMD: Does that mean it's on your
butt?
R: No, my back. And what kind of
tattoo do you have?
TMD: I have one of a little guy sleep-
ing on a crescent moon, on my right
shoulder blade.
R: Oh, the man on the moon. That's
cute.
TMD: Yeah, isn't it?
Does my voice sound sexy to you?
R: This is weird.
TMD: C'mon, just answer the ques-
tion. We've been through this ... I'm
with the Daily.
R: Here, talk to my roommate.
(Sigh.)
TMD: Hello? Who is this?
R: I'm not telling you my name.
TMD: OK, whatever. So, are you
going to help me out here?
R: Well, I know this isn't real, but
what the hell?
TMD: All I can say is: Wait for
Thursday. Then read the Weekend Mag-
azine. Jeez, no faith, no trust.
Where are you from?
R: Guess.
TMD: What is this? I'm the one in
charge. I dunno, West Coast?
R: Yep.
TMD: Cali?
R: Uh huh.
TMD: Great.
Have you ever enjoyed the pleasures
of synthetic meat?
R: No, I don't eat that much canned
food.
TMD: What do you think a kitten
would be like on magic mushrooms?
R: It would be like
MEEEOOOOWWW! Hahahaha.
TMD: Nice.
Spell Grosse Pointe. No cheating.
R: G-R-O-S-S-E P-O-I-N-T ... E
TMD: Ooh, nice. You're not sup-
posed to know that; you're from Califor-
nia.
R: Hey, I spelled it right, didn't I?
TMD: Yes, I suppose you did.
In one word, sum up our conversation.
R: Random.
TMD: Forgot to tell you - you can't
use "random." It's the Random Student
Interview, for crying out loud!
R: Why can't I use "random?" That's
what it was?
TMD: Will you just please pick
another?
R: Bizarro.
TMD: There you go ... wasn't that
hard.. So, you really don't believe that
I'm from the Daily?
R: Not at all.
TMD: Ha! Wonderful.
Douglas Anderson Reads Anderson
reads from his book, "The Annotated
Hobbit," a reader's introduction to the
book by J.R.R. Tolkien. 4 p.m. Shaman
Drum Bookshop, 315 S. State. Free.
662-7407.
CAMPUS CINEMA
Edward Scissorhands Ahh,sbefore
old Timmy sold out and cast Kris
Kristofferson in annoverbudget,
brainless Summertime spectacular
about damned, dirty apes. State
Theater Midnight.
The Good Girl See Thursday. State
Theater 2:30, 4:45, 7 & 9 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Friday. Michigan
Theater 4:45, 7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
One Hour Photo See Thursday. State
Theater 2:45, 5, 7:15, 9:15 & 11:45
p.m.
Secretary See Friday. Michigan
Theater 4:30, 7 & 9:15 p.m.
MUSIC
The Big Wu Wu? Wu who? Stop cry-
ing its only a jam band. Blind Pig,
208 S. First St., 10 p.m. $7 ($9
under 21). 996-8588.
Frequency w/ DJ Blnzo Binzo was
the name of the clownat my third
birthday. My therapist says the pain
will subside soon. The Necto. 516 E.
Liberty St., 9 p.m. $5. 994-5835
THEA TER
Defying Gravity See Thursday, 8 p.m.,
BOOKS
A LTERNA TIVES
The New York
Expressionism
Thursday.
Sunday
CAMPUS CINEMA
The Good Girl See Thursday. State
Theater 2:30, 4:45, 7 & 9 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Friday. Michigan
Theater 4:45, 7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
One Hour Photo See Thursday. State
Theater 2:45, 5, 7:15 & 9:15 p.m.
Secretary See Friday. Michigan
Theater 3:30, 6 & 8:15 p.m.
MUSIC
Iris Dement Did you see Judi Dench
in "Iris"? Yeah neither did anybody
else. The Ark, 36 S. Main St. 8 p.m.
$25. 761 1451.
Bird Jazz Jam Session Birds of a
feather stay away from this sort of
thing.. Bird of Paradise, 312 S.
Main St., 9 p.m. $5. 662-8310.
THEA TER
Defying Gravity See Thursday, 2
p.m. and 7 p.m., $22.50 for seniors
$19.
imaginary invalid See Thursday, 2
p.m.
School: Abstract
and Beyond See
Don't spit in that cop's burger ...
ALTERNATIVES
The New York School: Abstract
Expressionism and Beyond See
Thursday.
Monday
Tuesday
BOOKS
BOOKS
Daniel Mason Reads Mason reads from
his first novel, "The Piano Tuner," the
story of a British piano tuner sent deep
into Burma in the 19th century. 7 p.m.
Borders Books & Music, 612 E. Liberty.
Free. 668-7652.
Lance Olsen and Harold Jaffe Read Olsen
reads from his book, "Girl Imagined by
Chance" and Jaffe from his book, "False
Positive." 8 p.m. Shaman Drum
Bookshop, 315 S. State. Free. 662-
7407.
CAMPUS CINEMA
The Good Girl See Thursday. State
Theater 7 & 9 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Friday. Michigan
Theater 7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
One Hour Photo See Thursday. State
Theater 7:15 & 9:15 p.m.
Secretary See Friday. Michigan Theater
7 & 9:15 p.m.
MUSIC
David Mallet As in you'll want a largest
blunt object to beat yourself in the
head with. The Ark, 36 S. Main St. 8
p.m. $15. 7611451.
Mark Kieswetter and Ron Brooks in
case nobody knows Brooks is offically
my arch-nemesis. He and his jazzy bass
styling are a threat to humanity itself.
Bird of Paradise, 312 S. Main St., 9
p.m. $3. 662-8310.
Booked for Lunch Suspense author
Craig Holden ("The River Sorrow," "The
Jazz Bird") discusses his writing career,
his themes and techniques, and reads
from some of his work. 12:10 p.m. Ann
Arbor District Library - Northeast
Branch. 2713 Plymouth Rd. Free. 996-
3180.
Visiting Writers Series One of America's
major contemporary poets, Philip
Levine, gives a poetry reading; recep-
tion follows. 7:30 p.m. Michigan
League Ballroom, 911 N. University.
Free. 647-6471.
CAMPUS CINEMA
The Good Girl See Thursday. State Theater
7 & 9 p.m.
Mostly Martha See Friday. Michigan
Theater 7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
One Hour Photo See Thursday. State
Theater 7:15 & 9:15 p.m.
Secretary See Friday. Michigan Theater 7
& 9:15 p.m.
MUSIC
Blind Pig Showcase Do you know why
its called the Blind Pig? Neither do we.
Just asking was all. Blind Pig, 208 S.
First St., 10 p.m. free ($2 under 21).
996-8588.
Lucy Webster Grand Rapid's finest folk
star, ahead of a monkey that plays the
xylophone. The Ark, 36 S. Main St. 8
p.m. $10. 761-1451.
The Ron Brooks Trio Seriously though I
won't rest until RB admits he's trying
to control the minds of good hearted
Americans with his jazzy bass. Bird of
Paradise, 312 S. Main St., 9 p.m. $5.
662-8310.
Not a family film.
THEATER