0 9 0 0 8B - The Michigan Daily - Weekend Magazine - Thursday, April 11, 2002 Looking for Housing? Check out the Student Co-ops! 7 The Michigan Daily - Weekend Mag ANDY TAYLOR-FABE - THE EUPHIOQUESTION SMOKING IS COOL DECONSTRUCTING THE UNALTERABLE 2 and 4 month spring/summer contracts Approx. $140-$240/month* -j *ft PF 8month fall/winter contracts Approx. $415/month* Smoking is cool. It is a universal truth, and there is nothing that you or anyone else can do to change that. Accept it. Critics will say that smoking kills millions of people and is highly addictive, and they are right of course. Cigarettes have a strangle-hold on most smokers and have caused countless early deaths, horrible, debilitating diseases and burn-holes in that sweater that you just bought. However, when the hell did health and responsibility have anything to do with "cool"? Nothing is more attractive (especially for teenagers) than disregard for your personal well-being, self-destructive behavior and reck- less contempt for authority. A cigarette becomes an extension of the big middle finger to adults, teachers and anyone else who tells you that smoking is bad. To determine the causes of the inherent coolness of smoking, we must look to the pub- lic figures in popular culture. Picture Humphrey Bogart in "The Maltese Falcon," shoulders hunched, hat cocked to the side and a cigarette dangling loosely from his lips. Or recall Miles Davis in a dark room, clutching a cigarette between two fingers as he holds his trumpet. Or Bob Dylan circa 1966 with a tan- gled mess of hair, sunglasses and, sure enough, a cigarette. Or even a young Mike Wallace in the '50s, bringing us the news with a thin, gray wisp of smoke rising from his side. These icons, among countless others, have defined cool for us, and there is nothing that medical science or commercials or our parents can tell us to change that. (One might then argue that it is smokers, not smoking itself, that are cool, but that is just a superfi- cial, semantic argument, and we are losing our focus.) It's not that there are no cool non-smokers, but as much as you don't want to admit it, that cool non-smoker would be even cooler with a cigarette. That is not the most popular opinion ever expressed, but deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you agree with me. The problem is that it doesn't work that way for everyone. Picture the typical 13-year-old suburban kid, standing outside a convenience store with some of his grubby friends, trying his hardest to exude coolness and convince everyone around him that he does not have an acne-ridden disaster area of a face and a vocal pitch that fluctuates with no warning, and is, in fact, 25 years old with a car, possibly a gun and definitely some beer. The cigarette isn't fooling anyone, and his C.Q. (cool quotient) hasn't risen. Actually, I take that back. Even that kid is cooler. We must also consider man's obsession with fire. From the first time that a primitive human harnessed the unruly element, he has been captivated with the glowing red flame and the smoke that accompanies it. Cigarettes are like a portable inferno, and the dragon-like power to breathe smoke using this mystical wand of fire is an attractive prospect for many. Another fire-related perk is that you have an excuse to carry a lighter, which has many other practical, scientific uses, e.g. burning things you find on your living room floor. Smoking also becomes cool by .default, since there is nothing as powerfully uncool as anti-smoking advertising or spokespeople. From the sanctimonious, faux-guerilla "Truth" ads to squeaky-clean rock stars who endorse healthy living, there are few things as lame as anti-smoking propaganda. Even the most avid non-smokers find themselves wanting to grab a pack and light up when they see the pious, handheld camera commercials showing youths sticking it to the tobacco companies. A prime example of how non-smoking seri- ously detracts from the C.Q. of our leaders, institutions and role models is the recent re- vamp of James Bond. In the 60s and 70s, James Bond smoked as many cigarettes as he downed martinis, but with "Tomorrow Never Dies," the sophomore effort from Pierce Brosi calls his fa popul the C but si Il< You'r tione ly-cr medi rettes you'r execu their hoofs imag (C< Ho more drear the c smol< Th you c hope drug: - A The student co-ops at U-M are democratically owned and operated by their members. Real community at affordable prices since 1932. * Includes utilities, laundry, parking, social activities and all the food you can eat for Fall/Winter - meal plans available for Spring/Summer. For more information: www.icc.umich.org (734) 662-4414 Nogginz provides a laid back atmosphere, creative styles By Will EI-Nachef Daily Arts Writer "Hold on a sec, I'm going to go through and texturize you," is one of the more common phrases you'll hear at Nogginz, winner of the Best of Ann Arbor survey for the sixth year in a row. If you don't know what it means to get "texturized" don't worry because half of the other clients are probably wondering the same thing. The other half, however, is knowledgably requesting it. If you've wussed out and only gotten your hair done while on visits back home, Nogginz- will seem foreign compared to your hometown barbershop or beauty salon. Gone are the old men getting their ear hair trimmed while grumbling about the NPR news that's being broadcasted in a crowded room; gone are the aging beau- ticians past their prime trying to convince you that perms WILL make a comeback (is there a better example of a passe female hair-do?). Instead, Nogginz plays rock music, caters to the college crowd, and mostly employs college-aged cutters, some of whom have nose and lip peircings. "We have a totally different target. We're tar- geting the campus. That's why I love working in a campus salon --I'm cutting my age group, I'm listening to my music," said Nogginz cutter Corrine Foytik. Another reason Nogginz appeals to so many students is its dual barbershop/salon feel and its ability to cater to both sexes. "Technically we're cosmetologists. But this salon actually has a cosmetologist license and a barber license," explained Foytik. Andrew Patterson, a LS&A freshman, is pleased with his experiences at Nogginz, "I've gotten my haircut there three or four times from them. Every time it's been nice... They changed my style one time-I liked it. She just started cutting my hair and said, 'You know, you should try something different."' Patterson isn't alone in trusting the Nogginz cutters to give him a new style, though. From what Foytik had to say, it seems that many clients come in and leave the haircut style up to the stylist. Nogginz cutter Stephanie McQuarrie defines this as "Creative freedom. Someone who comes and gives you a rough idea of what they want, but tells you to do what you think looks good...It's a three dimensional art" Students also appreciate the informal atmosphere. "It's laid back, and college kids work there so it's cool. You can have nice conversations,' said Patterson. "People tell their hairdresser every- thing. Oh yeah, dude, they spill their guts. You'd be surprised with the shit people will tell you... I love it. I end up telling my clients a lot of stuff I shouldn't, too," expanded Foytik. She added, "I've had clients ask me for all kinds of advice, like sex and things like that. I've had guys ask me about going down on girls, like what feels better, what techniques they should use. And then I tell them- at least what I think." "Pretty much everyone here is really easy-going... But there's a fine line between being professional and, well you know what I mean; she concluded. However nice the atmosphere, Nogginz's merit ultimately comes down to the product. Despite the Best of Ann Arbor award, not all clients are satisfied. "I didn't think their haircut was of the greatest quality and I thought it was real- ly expensive... The haircut took approxi- mately four minutes," criticized LS&A junior Ben Goldfein. "I asked if they could do corn-rows, and out of the ten people working, none of them could do it! I don't trust anyone in Ann Arbor to cut this mane, anyway. It's a flowing beauty. It's an artwork and it needs to be worked by a master and not some Nogginz bum," complained Engineering freshman Mike Affeldt. Foytik justified the corn-row deficien- cy, "To have like one person request it a year wouldn't pay for our training [to learn that hair cut]" But, contrary to the above complaints, the masses voted otherwise in the Best of Ann Arbor survey. Foytik maintains, '"'I think we put out a pretty smooth ass hair- cut. We don't take appointments, it's walk-in only. You just sign in, and it's in and out." Just don't ask for a bievel.