12B - M ichigan Da iiy - W dg nd , etc. M agaz e _Thurs , January 11, 20 01 * LOST IN THE FUZZY ZONE '0 4IV 40L -W The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. ' w _W CUTS FROM THE EDITING ROC Anyone who's ever dated, been in a .lationship or even watched a sitcom has to relate to the "fuzzy zone" of a relationship. No, I'm not making a reference to pubic regions, so get your head out of the ;ut- ter. I'm talking about when you've dated someone for a little while and ou're not sure what your status is. I'm talking about all the awkward intro- ductions, "This is my, er, friend, um, boy/girl friend, um, this is (insert name here)." i'm talk- Lindsey Alpert Put Out or Get Out Well, for the benefit of all you Daily' readers who I've come to love (ok, maybe like would be the better word), I've decided to do a little investigation an the topic. I somehow stumbled across www' getgirls.comn. Being not particularly interested in how to get any woman I desire, but wondering about what men were being told in terms of "meeting. attracting and seducing single women," I came across the fuzzy zone question in the Tips of the Week section. And the word given to men across the country? Date women for no longer than a month. If it's not going to work out, end it, if it is, then ask for commit- ment. Of course, I had to ask some male friends of mine, and they concurred that a month was very often the cut- off point. Although there are excep- tions - some like to wait much, much longer, and others enjoy the friend with benefits aspect - many guys feel that they're ready to settle down after about a month of serious dating -meaning at least a few times a week. But, the important thing that I learned about men is that they can meet their dream woman, and if the timing isn't right, commitment will take a long time, if it happens at all. If a male is ready for commitment, he'll make it, if he's not, it doesn't really matter if you're Catherine Zeta-Jones. For females, the month marker tends to be about the same as well, although with females, the person tends to mean more than the timing. One of the best ways that a guy can warm a woman up for commitment, other than being Prince Charming, is by getting in with her friends. If you zan get one friend to say that he's cute, or he's nice, or anything positive, you've got one foot in the door. So, if you're close to the month point, have met the friends, talk a lit- tle bit about the future and are clearly in the fuzzy zone, how do you get out? Does commitment have to be a verbal agreement, or is it just somehow clear without saving a word? And if you don't have a verbal commitment and you meet, flirt, hook-up with someone else, are you cheating? While the implied method does happen, my research has found that unless it's a verbal agreement, any- thing goes. And while you still have your freedom before the verbal com- mitment is made, seriously dating multiple people can get confusing. And when you start slipping up on names, can't decide who you like bet- ter and can't give time to either party, you'll probably just wind up by your- self. Thus, the best thing that prisoners of the fuzzy zone can do is talk about it. If this is someone that you're com- fortable enough to make a commit- ment to, you should be comfortable enough to talk about your status. If not, you might want to go look else- where. - Lin-se' A/pert is eager for com- nients, questions, or aitn' ilfoIrmation about when the guY she' dating is going to commit. She can be reached at lalpert(, umzich.ediu. By the Daily Film Staff )aily Arts Writers Courtesy of 20th Ctu ; r; , Seann William Scott and Ashton Kutcher fail to entertain in "Dude, Where's My Car?" ing about seeing a good-looking per- son at a party and not knowing if you're allowed to go up and flirt with them or if it'd be considered cheating. tie fuzzy zone, probably one of the most fun vet difficult relationship maneuvers, only exists because of communication issues. If you ask about commitment - a word powerful enough to put fear into the heart of even the gutsy Crocodile Hunter - and your fuzzy zone partner isn't ready, you wind up entering another realm of fuzziness. If you ask prematurely a second time, not only' do you feel the tinge of rejection once again, but your partner may also feel like you're pushing the issue and make them back off. Then, if you don't ask, you're con- -tantly wondering what your status is, and feel awkward when any member of the opposite sex looks at you. It gets even worse when your parents ask about your new "friend." So, you'd think in this world of dating, which has an even smaller instruction book than life, that there'd be some kind of guidelines. Like, go out six times, meet three of each other's friends, you're a couple. You've gone out six times, but you spend more time in the bed than talking, urn, not looking so good. You've gone out once - if you think you're together, get a clue. See. Iow much easier this would make things. WORST Continued from Page 5B release of "Lost Souls" coincided with the re-release of "The Exorcist," a movie revered for its creepiness and sheer horror that "Lost Souls" attempts to achieve but never comes close to. The characters, like the rest of the movie, are a total void and except for a few shudder- worthy scenes, this movie will surely fade away with the rest of the nonde- script movies of this overdone genre - 10f N Mission: Impossible 2 Okay. I like dumb action movies as much as the next guy and the motor- cycle fight was pretty damn cool. But seriously, if one more person had pulled off their face to reveal that they were someone else, I would have killed myself. With Cruise star- ring and the great John Woo direct- ing, this could have been an explo- sive masterpiece. Instead, I get Anthony Hopkins reading the corni- est attempt at a catchphrase in cine- ma history. "Mr. Hunt, it's not Mission: Difficult..."Yeesh - LHI The Patriot If only Mel Gibson would have rid- den up to the Revolutionary troops wearing red, white, and blue face paint? This Sara Lee store-bought apple pie filth could have made num- ber 10 on my "best of" list - CC The Perfect Storm That a movie with such a talented cast could turn out so awful can only be blamed on its director Wolfgang Petersen. Despitc its success at the box-office. I still haven't met anyone with a kind thing to say about the film - MB The Replacements This movie has been done so many times that I can't even begin to imag- ine how someone green-lighted it. Should I list a few'? "Major League," "Necessary Roughness," the list goes on. It's full of cringe- worthy dialogue that makes you beg for mercy and cry for silence. And why, for the love of God, is Orlando Jones (the 7-UP guy) being hired for movies? - ATF Scary Movie This parody of teen slasher movies could have been 'good and Lord knows that the recently resurrected genre deserves a vood jab, but this film is just as bad, if not worse, than the films that it is making fun of. Although it contains references to many flicks, it is basically "Scream" without anything remotely scary. Just what we needed - ATF * Screwed Yeah, I know no one has heard of this Norm MacDonald Dave Chapelle epic about a couple of guys who kidnap themselves so some rich old lady pays lots of money and Danny Devito is sort of a necrophe- liac and I don't know. I guess it serves me right for thinking "All of Norm's other movies (i.e. "Dirty Work") were so good, this has ,o be a winner. Oh, and did I mention Sherman "Amen" Hemsly in a thong? - LH When the clock struck midnight on Dec. 31, 2000, many people felt ;he world would come to an end. Apparently, the film industry was counting on it. The past year has seen more bad movies than mediocre ones, and one big Battlefield Bomb that some are calling the worst film ever. If Ed Wood's "Plan 9 From Outer Space" had come out this year, it would have been in Academy con- tention. So, without further banter, we offer you our least favorites of the past 365 days. Fnjoy ® Battlefield Earth Ship this pure ciaematic trash into hyperspace, headed straight for deep freeze on the planet Iloth. File in between junked space probes and the Tauntaun dung receptacle. As the ugly (we're talking dried snot on a bathroom wall ugly) psycho TerI, John Travolta goes for broke and ends up with ... well. You saw the numbers (and I don't just mean "Lucky Numbers" either). Ruining everything he built from "Pulp Fiction" onward, Travolta better pray to God (or maybe guru L. Ron) that "Oceans I"' rides the high ti .; Christopher Cousino The Beach Being a closet fan of Leonardo Dicaprio, I wxas ecry excited to see "The Beach." Mystery, action, romance and adventure - Who could ask for more? Unfortunately, "The Beach" lacks in every aspect. The film tries to embrace the feel of "Lord of the Flies" mixed with a lit- tle of "The Blue Lagoon" as well as a dash of "Trainspotting." Sound like a strange combination? It is. I rarely ever want to stop watching a movie and I was very tempted to with this one because I didn't care -- about the characters, about the movie and where it was headed. We could only hope that "The Beach," like Leo, world wash away to sonic deserted island never to be heard from a ain -- Iilhelnina Aaur'itz M Dr. T & the Women With "Dr. T & the Women, "Robert Altman has proven to be the master of long boring films. Moreover, Richard Gere is beginning to rival Robin Williams for all time worst career choices. Not only was "Dr. T" a failure but his dramatic- romance film, "Autumn in New York." made us hope his name only resurfaces with reference to gerbils and vaseline - Leslie Boxer Dude, Where's my Car? This makes movies like "Road Trip" and "American Pie" seem like "Citizen Kane." Featuring dialogue that would make Beavis and Butthcad shudder, this film offers almost nothing to make up for the total lack of coherency. It's the kind of movie that could ruin the profes- sional reputation dren's children's Tailor-Fabuc of an actor's chil- children -- Andy E Duets Many of you may not recognize the film "Duets." That is because it was only in the theaters for about one week. As it turns out it was one week too many. "Duets" is about karaoke singers and the power to heal that lies in singing. The film is so unique- Iv terrible that I can only assume Bruce Paltrow bribed the studio to release it. Regardless, any film that uses, "I am different now I sing," to mend a broken marriage must be considered one of the year's worst movies - if not one of the all time worst movies ever - LB Dungeons & Dragons Worse than bad, this film was insulting to everyone involved as well as those nine of us that had to see it. The film makes little sense. I could have played a better villain than Jeremy Irons and Marion Wayans was a more insulting stereo- type than Jar Jar Binks, but a good deal more cartoonish. And what about the ending? Did they run out of film? Please God stay away from "Magic: The Gathering!" - Li/e H~enett' Teri (John Travolta) while their dad is dying. Yet example of why actors si direct. And Diane, what's v gloves? - Matthew Barrett The Ladies Man Uh, yeah, what is Julianne doing in this movie? - !1B Loser The first film ever to pre critics by outright brandin with the title "I suck." A she< pointment, Amy Heckerling shows that she has lost her And she doesn't know a dan about college kids, or how tI Boring, unfunny and det manhandle: Hanging Up Diane Keaton directs this truly wretched tale ters who bicker with and stars in of three sis- each other a h'