4 - The Michigan Daily - Friday, March 23, 2001
. * 420 MAYNARDI STREET ~a
ANN ARBOR, MI 48109 Cheap thrills at your fingertps
daily.letters@umich.edu DAVID HORN HORNU RXPHX
-4**,
EDITED AND MANAGED BY
STUDENTS AT THE
UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN
SINCE 1890
GEOFFREY GAGNON
Editor in Chief
MICHAEL GRASS
NICHOLAS WOOMER
Editorial Page Editors
Unless otherwise noted, unsigned editorials reflect the opinion of the majority of the
Daily's editorial board. All other articles, letters and cartoons do not
necessarily reflect the opinion of The Michigan Daily.
A pparently there are
more websites
devoted to pomog-
raphy than to anything else
on the Internet. I can't say
that I'm at all surprised by
that, although I do wish
that there were more sites
devoted to Homography (I
check daily. There seem to
be none), but that's another story.
The abundance of online porn is, in my
opinion, technology at its finest. The traditional
porn industry makes billions every year and
their ability to earn that money, like their more
socially acceptable older brothers the film and
music industries, is being undermined by inno-
vators and entrepreneurs on the web.
But the point of this column is not to praise
the great pornography pioneers of the 21st
Century. It is, rather, to direct your attention to
the other high-water mark of the Internet age. I
am referring, of course, to www.bored.com.
Bored.com was first brought to my atten-
tion during my senior year of high school. If
your high school education was at all like
mine, your day didn't start until noonish, and
finish by about 12:45. The rest of your day
(that was spent on school grounds) was spent
idling away the hours until you could notch
another day-gone-by in the countdown to
emancipation. In this pathetic state of worth-
lessness, bored.com found me, and my appre-
ciation of the Internet grew to immeasurable
heights. One could argue that this was also the
beginning of the end. I don't think I've ridden
a book, or read a bike, or practiced proper syn-
tax since then. But those acts of productivity,
thoughtfulness and intelligence are in the past.
Bored.com has shown me the Internet in its
greatest moment.
Enter the URL, and begin a journey into
a state of mindlessness and lost time.
Bored.com is a list of links to the most,
well, non-boring (let us say stimulating?)
sites on the web. Among them are tradition-
al IQ and relationship tests, movie and tele-
vision scripts, and the like. But tread
through those murky distractions, and find
the most interesting sites that there be.
One link, found towards the bottom of
the bored.com page, is a link to AT&T's
experimental "text to speech" software.
Type in any phrase (my own experimenting
lead me to conclude that any phrase either
full of vulgarity or complementary towards
David Horn seems to work fine), and listen
to a man, women or child speak the phrase
in impressively smooth English. You would
think that this parlor trick would be but a
momentary solution to your boredom, but
you'd be wrong. It's mesmerizing.
Another site that provides countless
hours of entertainment is
www.hotornot.com. Needless to say, its link
can be found at bored.com. Hotornot.com is
simple: It cues up picture after picture of
average Joes and Judys like you and me, and
asks you to rate their looks on a scale of 1to
10. It's shallow? Stupid? You're above it?
Let me tell you -- you're not.
I thought I was, but it sucks you in like a
little kid slurping up his last drop of chocolate
milk. I, pathetically, even caved and posted my
own picture.
My final highlight, although there are many-
that I urge you to discover on your own, isa,
little gem that is a collection of brillianC-
thought-provoking questions on the nature 06
things. For instance: "Did you ever notice::
when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad f
you, but when you take him in a car, he sticks
his head out the window?" "If God droppi
acid, would he see people?" and "If people
from Poland are called Poles, why aren't peo-
ple from Holland called Holes?"
If questions like those can't keep yout
scrolling down for the few minutes you R
have until your orgo or econ or poli sci lec.-Z,
ture, then you've a stronger will than me
But the likelihood is that you don't. Enjoy.:
How does this crap keep me entertained? 1
don't know. It does.
There are plenty of "productive" uses -
for the World Wide Web, of course. Scie
tists from all over the world can share the
research. Students who are physically lim-
ited to their bedrooms can attend "virtual
classrooms." We can trade pirated music,
and enjoy our pornography (and Hornogra-
phy) without the awkward look of disap-
proval from the fellow at the newsstand.
But the bread and butter of the revolution-
ary tool that is the internet is the quintessence
of procrastination: Boredicom.
This is how our society is utilizing t
glorious possibilities of the WWW. I love it.
David Horn's column runs every'
other Friday. Give himfeedback at
wwwmichigandaily.com/forum or
via e-mail at hornd@umich.edu
LETTERS TO
THE EDITOR
Fraternity president
offered one-side
account of incident
To THE DAILY:
I am writing to express my disappointment
and disgust concerning Jacquelyn Nixon's arti-
cle, "Inquiry continues in hockey team fight"
(03/22/01).
The article is essentially a reprint of an earli-
er article describing the one sided account of an
incident at the Sigma Chi fraternity house.
The story, which has graced the front page
not once, but twice, slanders athlete Josh
Langfeld and the rest of the Michigan hockey
team. The Daily's repetitive and uninformative
article cites only the fraternity president's
account of what actually happened. I wonder if
his words are slightly self serving? The Interfra-
ternity Council president's words blaming the
hockey players as instigators were also especial-
ly unsubstantiated.
Does he really believe that the hockey play-
ers were "escorted" from the party? I've been
to more than a few fraternity parties and remov-
ing guests usually involves several guys team-
ing up to assault "the instigator." Everyone
knows that a bunch of underage drunken frater-
nity brothers would never instigate a fight.
Further, does anyone really believe that
Langfeld was "harassing female guests" as
some witnesses stated? Clearly, the hockey
team hasn't offered its side of the story, but this
doesn't excuse the Daily for reprinting a clearly
biased account of a serious incident.
DAVID SHAY
Business senior
Editors Note: The men's hockey team has refused
to comment on the Sigma Chifight allegations.
Code takes away too
many civil liberties
at students' expense
To THE DAILY:
I am writing in response to Galaxor Nebulon
a.k.a. Ryan Hughes, charges pending here at the
University. Hughes is being accused of assault
and destruction of property under the University
Statement of Student Rights and Responsibili-
ties, formerly the Code of Conduct.
Hughes allegedly spray painted a sign held
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YOUF TA)( MONEY -b T ir git ,Ak4s -ot:
by an anti-gay protester at the kiss-in rally. As a
graduate of University President Lee Bollinger's
First Amendment Law class, I am astonished
the University would teach one thing and prac-
tice another.
Bollinger explains to his students that it is
very difficult to limit speech and expression.
Political speech and expression is given the
highest protection by the law because itis key to
maintaining an active democracy. We may not
like the expression or speech, but at least it's
there for us to make that determination. Hughes
acted politically and expressed his view-point.
The Code should follow the standard set by the
Supreme Court and drop the charges.
The University argues Hughes destroyed
property. However, the property destroyed was
not University property and the property owners
have chosen not to press charges. Why does the
University suppose it has the right to act in a
case where no charges have been pressed?
Because the event took place on University
property? But, if Hughes were a non-student
standing on the same property he would be free
and clear right now. So University students are
held to stricter laws than anyone else in the state
of Michigan?
Finally, the University claims Hughes
assaulted a person. Apparently spray painting a
sign on a person's body, causing no injury, and
leaving the person 100 percent uptouched con-
stitutes assault. Even the alleged victim didn't
feel an assault took place. So, again, why does
the University?
Maybe the University feels the intent was
the problem. However, using the same logic, the
University could use the Code against anyone
touching another person on campus. Athletes,
beware, smacking a fellow athlete on the rear is
assault under the Code. Men, don't pinch your
girlfriend's ass on the Diag, that's assault. A
God forbid you should playa childish prank on
a friend and tape something to his back, that's
assault.
The examples are extreme, but a court of
law uses the slippery slope logic to prevent the
restriction of political speech and expression.
Finally, if the University plans on using the
Code as a measure to restrict speech protected
by the Constitution, let's go all the way with it.
All student newspapers should be shut do
immediately, particularly the ones with Repub
can ideologies. We tend to be a liberal campus,
and according to the Code, we can. Let's also
refuse to allow Student's for Life, University
Republicans, anything religious, and all groupa
having to do with business, finance, or econom
ics, todhold meetings on campusproperty.
I'd also like to ask that members of The
Michigan Review be kicked out of the Universi-
ty. I don't like what they say and I don't like the
manner they go about saying it. Oh, and where
was the Code when I tried to handa guy af
in the Diag and he stuck his tongue out, spit,a
gave me the thumbs down? He did exactly what
Hughes did; showed his disapproval for my
cause. I actually think I caught a fleck of spit in
the eye and I kow some of my fliers had spit
on them. Isn't that assault and destruction of
property?
Drop the charges. Hughes may not have
chosen the best course of action but no laws
were broken and no harm was done..,I
expressed himself, politically.
In the United States, a person is allowed to
as long as he doesn't violate any other law while
doing it. According to the police and his target;
Hughes didn't.
AMEE BINGHAM
Alumns
~ge
territory.
Let it be made clear that the occupation
the West Bank, Gaza, and East Jerusalem, a$
well as the continued expansion of settlement
units in these areas, is in clear violation of inter-
national law. Finally, the Palestinian leadership
on campus, as well as Justin Wilson, chairperson
of the Michigan Student Assembly Peace an
Justice Committee, has repeatedly invited Jere"
my Menchik, writer of the guest viewpoint
"Zahr painted wrong picture of Israel, Co
West" (3/15/01), and other pro-Israel leaders
community-wide town hall meetings regarding
the conflict. We are, however, consistently faced
with rejection on the basis of a fear that the rest
of campus will see the reality ofIsraeli brutality.
Furthermore, Cusniffe made bold statement
in his column with rhetoric indicating that Israel
is not practicing apartheid. I implore everybody
who wants to learn about the conflict to visit
Amnesty International's website
(http://www.amnestyusa.org/counies/israeL a
d occupied erritories/) and see the evidence
Israeli apartheid. Cunniffe's column mad
clear, and his column should serve to teach
everybody a lesson, that one should do their
homework before going out and bashing the
work of innocent children caught in the horror of
unjust oppression.
HIBA GHAu
LSA junior
The writer was the exhibit coordinatorfor the
Palestinian children's exhibit in Pierpont Commons.
Expressions of innocence under si
VIEWPOINT
As the coordinator of the Palestinian chil-
dren's art exhibit in Pierpont Commons (Inno-
cence Under Siege), I was offended after reading
Peter Cunniffe's column, "The Weapons of
War: Rocks, Kids and Crayons" (3/15/01). Cun-
niffe: You are indeed lost, but unfortunately, the
aggression and brutality that has been raging for
over half a century in Palestine is far from a
game.
Many would agree that the media coverage
of this issue is almost exclusively one-sided and
that the majority of the people suffering from
this siege, namely the Palestinians, are not get-
ting the international security they are entitled to.
Our dissatisfaction with the media's coverage of
the struggle enticed us to brainstorm ways to
expose the perspective of the Palestinian chil-
dren that has been, for the most part, cast aside
by the general public. Our brainstorming result-
ed in what we thought to be the ideal expressive
medium: Art.
Two weeks after the recent uprising, we
decided to call an Arab school in Jerusalem and
ask them to send us students' drawings that best
depict what they witness on a daily basis. The
school sent us a package of the most expressive
and heart-wrenching children's drawings. Cun-
niffe's notion that the art is "meant to emotional-
ly manipulate people into believing Palestinians
are merely helpless victims of a brutal oppres-
sor" is unfounded. According to Steve Sosebee,
CEO of the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund
(http://www.wolfenet.com/~pcrf/), 75 percent of
Palestinian children show signs of post-traumat-
ic stress disorder as a result of military occupa-
tion. What does Cunniffe expect, pictures of
sunsets and rainbows? Cunniffe, who lives in a
comfortable bubble - and others like him -
needs to open his cynical eyes that criticize the
cries of help from children bom into extreme
oppression.
Cunniffe chastises the exhibit and writes that
"The drawings in Pierpont Commons were yet
another piece of propaganda, and certainly the
most ingenious one, meant to inflame anti-Israeli
sentiment." Contrary to what Cunniffe has
implied, no one, not us nor the children's teach-
ers, influenced the children's art in any way.
These are real children, this is their original
work, and yes, although itsis hard to believe,
they have expressed legitimate fears. This is not
about war, peace, or politics. It is about children
that have been the silent victims of decades of
conflict in the Middle East. It is saddening any-
one couldreduce the efforts of children that have
witnessed too much bloodshed and suffered too
much pain and fear to mere propaganda
Let it be made clear that the Israeli govem-
ment breaks more UN resolutions and is criti-
cized more heavily by human rights
organizations than all other countries. Let it be
made clear that Israel has made an organized
effort to push all Arabs out of Israeli controlled
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