4A - The Michigan Daily - Weanesday, March 21, 2001
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420 MAYNARD STREET
ANN ARBOR, MI 48109
daily. letters@umich.edu
The anatomy of a four letter word
JOSH WICKERHAM T utu )Oa
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EDITED AND MANAGED BY
STUDENTS AT THE
UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN
SINCE 1890
GEOFFREY GAGNON
Editor in Chief
MICHAELG RASS
NICHOLAS WOOMER
Editorial Page Editors
Unless otherwise noted, unsigned editorials reflect the opinion of the majority of the
Daily's editorial board. All other articles, letters and cartoons do not
necessarily reflect the opinion of The Michigan Daily.
he bums will
always lose!
Do you hear
me, Lebowski? The bums
,.will always -"
There's no other film
that sums up our post-
concerned world like the
Dude in "The Big
Lebowski." It's not just
the Dude's shirking of responsibility that
makes him such a lovable anti-hero, nor is it
his free-spirited nature that makes his
lifestyle the pinnacle of our evolutionary
path. It's not just the Dude's pleasant calm
that makes him a nameless bodhisattva, nor
his laziness that makes him the archetype of
the modern man. If you please, fair readers,
it's the Dude's use of the phrase "fuck it."
When people first started using fuck on
college campuses in the '50s and '60s, it
really meant something. Unlike the nebulous
adjective/verb/noun status the word holds
today, when somebody said "fuck", they had
an attitude. They had something to say and
they were radical. "Fuck it" wasn't just lazi-
ness. "Fuck it" was the battle cry of the acid
anarchists and radical feminists alike. "Fuck
it" was the precursor to multiculturalism.
Now, with your patronage gentle readers,
This Postmodern World would like to reap-
propriate a word that used to have some
oomph to it. Presenting, in no particular
order, and with no particular concern for the
fuckables not contained herein, TPMW gives
you the tired student's guide to revolutionary
fucking.
On race: Literally. Who cares about
racial diversity? Black? White? How about
no races?
On racial boundaries: Just stop paying
attention, because if you ain't breedin,' we
ain't moving forward. So let's get it on.
On gender: Or as they used to say, gen-
der fuck. We need more men in dresses,
more women with armpit hair, more men as
housewives. Gender is a spectrum folks.
On Hideki: A lot of people have gotten
upset about the negative press Hideki has
been receiving. That's because they've only
met the street-talking, name-recalling Hideki
with the big sign. (Note: bigger sign). Most
have never been to an MSA meeting. If you
are one of these people, you have no idea
how Hideki operates.
The man can't run a meeting. He also
doesn't have a vice-presidential candidate
who can do two jobs.
Don't vote for him. Vote for me
instead.
On the Bush dynasty: We have to come
to terms with four more years of Bush. And
since the Democrats are rolling over on
every issue presented to them, these four
years are going to be hell. Despite the proba-
ble setbacks on gay rights, foreign policy,
domestic policy and - well, you know the
litany, Junior is doing one thing right.
I'm glad someone is propelling us toward
environmental catastrophe. Seriously, I think
that's the only way people are going to wake
up to the threat of environmental destruction.
It's not until New York is submerged and
small island nations disappear from the map
that we're going to do anything.
And besides, a Bush presidency really is
mobilizing the forces of progressive politics
against him. Ralph Nader was right. Can't
you see them mobilizing?
On 'fuck that': Who needs pronouns
anyway? I'm sick of referring to a person,
place, thing, idea or act that was menti l
previously or that can be inferred from.;,Me
context of the sentence. I'm also leery of
words that can't be defined without using
them in their definition.
On 'fuck sucks': I'm tired of hearing
people say "that sucks."
What's wrong with sucking? When we
use suck in the pejorative sense, it iein-
forces lines of power. How is that the sucker
is subordinate to the sucked? Think about
the origin of this word the next time, it
comes up.
On work: Nothing in this world Ifas
caused more pain and strife for the humian
race than having to sacrifice the majority of
our adult lives to work. In the future, I hope
we can see beyond such scams. Why-talk
about better working conditions when:*e
can have no working conditions at all?
Playing is a lot more fun than working,
so fuck it. Workers of the world, quit your
jobs! Abolish work.
Sleep in. Take a breather. Do it for e
Dude. The bums will win in the end.
Fuck you. Fuck you very much.
Josh Wickerham's column runs every
other Wednesday. Give him feedbackat
www.michigandaily.com/forum or
via e-mail atjwickerh@umich.ed.
Y EDITORIAL ANALYSIS; .
UNMASKING THE C ';-.'""
THIRD IN A SERIES
If DPS isn't pressing charges, why should 'U'?
Prosecutorial process
wrapped in mystery,
administration takes
justice into own hands
hile hundreds of people turned out to
show their support for the LGBT
community during Queer Visibility
Week's Kiss In on Feb. 16, a less welcome
group of people also came - members of hate-
ful pastor Fred Phelps' Westboro Baptist
Church. Although Phelps was not present him-
self, his followers carried signs on the Diag with
messages like "Fags doom nations," or "AIDS
cures fags" and "Matt Shephard - Two years in
hell." The group tried, but failed, to crush the
spirit of the rally.
However, the protesters did not go complete-
ly ignored. According to Department of Public
Safety reports, the signs of some of the protest-
ers were vandalized when someone ran by and
spray-painted them with purple paint.
What followed the incident was another
manifestation of the inherent unfairness of the
Code of Student Conduct, recently renamed the
Statement of Student Rights and Responsibilities
last month by University President Lee
Bollinger. LSA senior Ryan Hughes, who is
running for Michigan Student Assembly presi-
dent with the Friends Rebelling Against Tyran-
ny party under the pseudonym Galaxor
Nebulon, was led away by DPS officers and has
been charged under the Code for assault and
vandalism.
Although the police have not charged Hugh-
es with any crime, administrators in the Fleming
Administration Building have decided to take
justice into their own hands.
Hughes' hearing will take place this Friday
at 2 p.m. behind closed doors in the Office of
Student Conflict Resolution on the sixth floor of
the Fleming Administration Building.
Under the Federal Education Rights to Priva-
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cy Act, the University cannot release informa-
tion or comment on Hughes' or any specific
Code case. It is this silence that contributes to
the veil of mystery that shrouds the Code
process. Thanks to Hughes' openness with his
own case, students will have a unique opportuni-
ty to see how the administration charges, prose-
cutes and punishes students. The Daily's
editorial page will follow him though the
process every step of the way.
Examining OSCR's conduct so far in Hugh-
es' case, one word comes to mind - question-
able.
The way in which the University has decided
to bring charges, in accordance with the Code of
Student Conduct, has been unfair and deceitful.
Hughes and his lawyer, Jodi Masley of the
Detroit-based firm Scheff and Washington said
it was difficult to discover the nature and basis
of the University's charges.
While Hughes and Masley
have still been unable to obtain a
7 police report detailing the charges,
OSCR demanded to meet with
Hughes. Although Hughes faced
difficulty in seeing his own police
report, what he didn't find out
until later was that OSCR already
had possession of it.
Hughes received a letter dur-
ing spring break from OSCR
informing him that he would be
charged under the Code for van-
dalism and assault; according to
reports, spray-paint had hit the
face of one of the protesters. The
letter informed him that he would
need to have a meeting with
OSCR immediately following
spring break.
However, the meeting that
OSCR called allowed Hughes no
time to prepare a case. The letter
also downplayed the importance
of the meeting in such a way that,
as Hughes believes, discouraged
him from contacting an attorney.
Under the Code, students
charged are allowed to have an
press charges and is required to release all
records of alleged crimes committed by students
to the University. By calling the charge the
result of a "complaint" filed by DPS, the Uni-
versity promotes the false notion that DPS is
pushing for Hughes to be charged.
Under the Code, after charges are filed and
the student is convicted, a process of mediation
ensues. However, if neither members o e
Westboro Baptist Church, the alleged victims,
nor DPS has decided to press charges, the ques-
tion is who will Hughes be mediating with?
The Code also dictates that either five stu-
dents or an administrator will deteimine the out-
come of the case. Under this process, there is no
"jury pool" method of establishing an unbiased
panel. This case shows the University's'com-
plete discretion throughout the process as OSCR
serves as both the judge and the jury in w is
patronizingly - and falsely - called an educa-
tional process, rather than what it really is: A
vehicle for punitive measures in what Masley
aptly described as "a kangaroo court where you
don't have any rights."
Jessica Curtin, a Michigan Student Assem-
bly representative, noted that the harshest codes
seem to appear at the universities where there is
the strongest history of student activism'and
expressed worries that as activism continues to
grow at the University, charges brought under
the code will increasingly turn to ones brct
against student activists.
Masley called into question the University's
motives for charging Hughes, who said the
Westboro Baptist Church protesters were wag-
ing a "violent attack" on a "positive space for
queer students to feel comfortable."
Once again it has become clear that the
implementation of the Student Code of Con-
duct is not designed to be an educational
process. In the case of Hughes, the Co is
also being used to charge a student Who
should not be charged at all - if neithef the
"victims" nor DPS wish to press charges, the
University has no place stepping in.
The Code represents a completely rifair
process to prosecute a student using a system
in which the basic rights of the accused are
comoletelv denied.
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