4A -- The Michigan Daily - February 1, 2001 icg Sirigun -afig 420 MAYNARD STREET ANN ARBOR, MI 48109 daily.letters@umich. edu The greatest story ever told (by Chris Columbus) CHRIS KULA UNSUNG ANN ARBOR 0o I EDITED AND MANAGED BY STUDENTS AT THE UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN SINCE 1890 GEOFFREY GAGNON Editor in Chief MICHAEL GRASS NICHOLAS WOOMER Editorial Page Editors Unless otherwise noted, unsigned editorials reflect the opinion of the majority of the Daily's editorial board. All other articles, letters and cartoons do not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Michigan Daily. S ometimes when I read the daily paper or watch the evening news, I openly weep for the children of today. Not because they're facing new dangers in drug use or because the quality of a public school education is rapidly diminishing or because they're confronted with violence in every direction they turn. No, I shed my tears for a much greater injustice: Today's children are not being offered the same brand of excellent kids' movies that were commonplace a genera- tion ago. If your grade school years fell between Gibby in '84 and Joe D. in '90, you should consider yourself very lucky: You were firsthand witness to one of the most dynam- ic periods in the child-adventure film indus- try (not to mention Michigan professional sports at their finest). Back when we were still having recess twice a day - not unlike today's average Kinesiology student - the major studios were churning out one kid-oriented epic after another. "The Goonies." "The Flight of the Navigator." "Adventures in Babysit- ting." "SpaceCamp." "The NeverEnding Story." "WarGames." "Iron Eagle." These were movies that placed children in the role of protagonist and showed them to be just as capable of solving problems/saving the day as their adult counterparts. The kids of today simply do not experience the same kind of positive. portrayals as we did and I have to believe that it will make a difference in their adult lives. If you just stop for a second and think what we learned from those films, you'll be glad you were a child of the Reagan era - you know, as if possessing the title "child of the Reagan era" wasn't enough to make you whistle Dixie. From "The Goonies," the sterling flag- ship of the '80s child-adventure film fleet, we learned that a group of 12-year olds could not only outsmart evil Italian crimi- nals and circumvent underground booty traps (booby traps, that's what I said), but also show acceptance for large, chocolate- loving freaks suffering from severe birth defects. I'm referring, of course, to Chunk. Just as "The Goonies" featured the always-popular "rag-tag bunch" approach to casting, stock characterization was also used to great success in "SpaceCamp," in which each member of the teen-aged crew aboard the runaway shuttle was able to step up and use their unique, individualized tal- ent at just the right moment to narrowly avert disaster. These "Lea Thompson, only you can land the shuttle!" scenarios showed children of the '80s that every person has one special ability. That or a robot named Jinx. Every pretentiously artsy English major who's ever donned the black turtleneck will tell you that, in their youth, they found a quality teacher in the Bastian character from "The NeverEnding Story." To wit: Valuable Lesson One: To spend all of your time reading mystical fairy tales isn't necessarily "gay" or "fruity" or "indicative of a homosexual lifestyle." Valuable Lesson Two: The same can't always be said for guys named Bastian. And the secrets don't stop there, Mr. Willy. If there's trouble brewing overseas, don't trust your government - trust an old black man named Chappy. He'll get you the fighter jet you need to instill peace in the Middle East. Chappy. Twenty-one years of age is in no way too old to still be waiting for a babysitter@ who looks like Elisabeth Shue. Please tuck me in. If someone ever asks you to play a game called "Global Thermonuclear War," you're probably going to want to decline and stick to more non-apocalyptic recreations like Candyland, Connect Four and Chutes and Ladders. But, if you're really bent on risk- ing life and limb for a cheap thrill, might I suggest Hungry Hungry Hippos? Chris Kula 's column runs evervy Thursday. Email him at ckula@uinich.edu and ask him to do the Truffle Shuffle. Ashcroft's religion should not be used against him TO THE DAILY: When Al Gore tapped Joe Lieberman for his vice-presidential pick last August, the choice of the orthodox Jewish senator was hailed as exceptional and ground-breaking. Sen. Lieberman, who uses his faith as a guide on many political issues, was perhaps the most important reason why Al Gore came so close to capturing the White House despite running an abysmal campaign. However, while critics and favorites alike praised Lieberman as a veep choice, and also expressed n concern in his using faith as a compass for decisions, the nomi- nation of former Sen. John Ashcroft for Attorney General has not received the same praise. It is hypocritical to praise Lieber- man's commitment to his faith while chastising John Ashcroft for his adherence to his own faith. It is sad to see that people are disgracing a man who seems to be religious as well as honest. Ashcroft's conservative voting record should not serve as an impediment to his nomination. Such an appointment should not be criticized on an ideological basis since there are no questions about Ashcroft's moral or ethical capability to enforce the nation's laws. There is a clear hypocrisy that exists in the media and at the University in that Lieberman is congratulated for being reli- gious while Ashcroft is derided for being religious. And who knows, maybe after the last eight years, we need an attorney general who is honest and uses his faith in helping actually enforce the laws of the country that have been so thoroughly neglected by the previous administration. NIKHIL SUDAME LSA first-year student Article needed to present all facts on vouchers plan To THE DAILY: In an article ("Promise of education impor- tant to Bush") printed Jan. 24, Hanna LoPatin reports on President Bush's plans to improve the education system in the U.S. She does not, however, clearly explain the theory behind the voucher system - the specific point around which all the controversy stems. The writer states that the voucher system, "... directs federal funds away from public schools in order to provide scholarships towards private schools" LoPatin continues to say that under Bush's plan, the system "(takes) funds away" after a school fails for a period of time. These state- ments are all true. But what she fails to make explicit is that the "scholarships toward private schools" would be given to students wanting to disenroll from the failing public schools. Additionally, the funds "(taken) away" from a failing school are also given back to that school's student body for its use at other schools. By not making these points clear, LoPatin ATTE -O t On Brian Ellerbe ! * Michigan basketball has been embarrassed enough by coach To THE DAILY: What else really needs to be said about Brian Ellerbe and his coaching here at the University of Michigan. "Fifty one point loss to Michigan State last year?" Or how about six straight losses to our in-state rival? Or maybe the 34-2 beginning of our game with Duke this year? Watching Tuesday night's contest, I was shocked and embarrassed to see our players "quit," as Chris Young would say it, against one of the top teams in the country. We did not play like a team should. Bill Martin, our athletic director, even said we looked "unorganized" on the court. Take a look on the floor of the Bres- lin Center next time Michigan State plays at home. They have a picture of the state of Michigan on their court, sig- nifying their dominance in basketball in Michigan. The rivalry is not even competitive anymore. I am a huge Michigan fan, yet when we play Michigan State, I don't even think we have a chance anymore. The talent is there. We have great big men; an All-American candidate in LaVell Blanchard. The question is, when are we going to get a coach who can handle a major Division I program, rather than having to rely on a mediocre coach who led Loyola College (Md.) to a record of 34- 47? My answer is now. The University has been embarrassed enough by a coach that lets his players quit in a huge game. How many more "behind the wood- shed beatings" as ESPN called it will it take for something to happen? What will Martin's answer be? Maybe Ellerbe will make Martin's decision a little easier. NATHAN BERTUCCI LSA senior Ellerbe's leadership hEr te ck.m P t-n 0 MARJORIE MARSHALL/Daily fy this unpalatable situation. How has this happened? Who is responsible? The University is supposed to be about excellence. Where is the excellence in our basketball program? I don't think that even Bob Ufer could find any enthusiasm for a Brian Ellerbe-coached team. Who dug this guy up anyway? Who is it that thinks that the coach of the Michigan basketball team should have such inadequate credentials? Who among you is ready to stand before the alumni and fans and say that it is acceptable that Michigan State has a better basketball coach than Michi- gan? We deserve better. The honor and dignity of the many great coaches and athletes that brought 100 years of "glory and fame" to Michigan must not be tainted by allowing this mediocrity, or in the case of basketball, disgrace and ineptness, to continue for even another minute! We deserve a program that we can be proud of. A program like Duke, with a coach of intelligence and integrity who recruits athletes of skill, character and intelligence. I strongly urge the University to replace Ellerbe with a coach of proven success and high character. The follow- ing coaches all have the potential to build{ the kind of basketball program that i, worthy of Michigan: Rick Majerus, Rick 9 F