12B - The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. Magazine - Thursday, April 6, 2000
The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. Magazine
[A2 Best of Dating
Take out your sweet
'Beauty,' hit the Arb
and get some booty
iAiBest of the Rest
The Best of the Rest
are all winners, too
American Beauty (Best Date Movie)
Let's see: Not one but two bloodless mar-
riages, rampant real estate infidelity,
sleeping with G-13 purveyors, 42-year-
olds lusting after 16-year-olds, closeted
Marines - wow, this campus has a funny
idea of a date movie. Perfect excuse to
tell your date, "Sometimes there's so
much beauty in the seat next to me, I feel
like I can't take it."
The Arb (Best Place for a First Date,
Best Place for a Secret Rendezvous, Best
Public Place for Sex) The beauty of the
great outdoors is always a pristine setting
to "meet" someone for the first time, if
for only a night. Whether you're just get-
ting to know each other, sharing undis-
closed information or getting to know
undisclosed body parts. Whatever activi-
ty, childish, fun, lewd or downright
dbscene, head back to nature to get in
touch with your primal sense of being.
Class (Best Place to Meet a Mate) OK,
so you have the ability to figure out if
your potential suitor is an idiot before
making your first move. And you should-"
n't have to worry about beer goggles
from 10 to 11:30 a.m. So suck it up and
propose a time to compare notes.
The Diag (Best Place to Break Up) It's
kinda symbolic: Here's the main place of
intersection on campus where many
paths cross and diverge. "It's time to
move on, see other people ..." In case of a
traumatic reaction by your significant
other, you have the added protection of
the public as well as the option for many
quick getaways. When you're dumping
your sweet soulmate, it's an added bonus
to have the lyric motif of those religious
freaks trumpeting their condemnations of
our campus soaked in sex and sin.
"No." (Best Rejection Line) Short.
Sweet. To the point. Mutual communica-
tion is key to a blossoming relationship.
Honesty is always the best policy. Now
versity.com (Best Online Notes)
Started up by some University grads,
they've got free notes for more classes
than you'll ever take.
varsitybooks.com (Best Online
Textbooks) So long Ulrich's, hello online
book shopping. Cheaper and often faster
that wating in line for hours, varsity-,
books.conz led the pack this year with
frustrated University student-customers.
yahoo.com (Best Search Engine) Do
you? If you don't, and their ad campaign
hasn't convinced you, then punch in the
familiar URL and whisk yourself away
to search engine heaven.
mgoblue.com (Best University
Website) Some think the website is one
reason Goss got the boot - too much
cash went into its creation. But Mikey
rentdetective.com (Best Apartment
Locator) Not only is it accessible at all
hours of the day, it gives you the option
of chosing where on campus you'd like
to find a place to live.
www.station.sony.com (Best Gaming
Site) If you spend this much time on line,
you need to seek help. Quickly.
Sleep (Best Excuse for Cutting Class)
This is the best excuse for just about any-
thing. Sleep is highly underrated in these
parts and oh, so precious.
Computer Crashed (Best Excuse for
a Late Paper) OK, so the dog isn't a valid
excuse anymore. We suggest you name
your computer Fido.
Capri Pants (Best Fad) They look SO
cute, don't they, girls? And guys, is there
a quicker way into your heart that a par-
tially exposed calf? We think not.
CCRB (Best Hangout for Jocks) I got
that tight, sexy six-pack I always wanted
but was never able to attain at the CCRB.
Rendez Vous Cafe (Best Hangout for
Smokers) Cafe Felix was pretty high up
on the list, but in between your freshly
brewed coffee and quasi-mideastern cui-
Don't even pretend you aren't enthralled by ti
Courtesy of Dreamworks SKG
"I'll be whatever you want me to be, honey." Ahhh, the future you and your date can look forward to.
get the fuck outta my face, bitch.
Picnic (Best Idea for an Unusual Date)
Everyone goes for dinner and a movie.
Treat your special "friend" with a fun
"Splendor in the Grass." Remember to
bring a blanket for cuddling. Added
touch: Return to your childhood with
Stan & Jan Berensteins''"The Berenstein
Bears Go on a Picnic.,,
sine, be prepared for a healthy dose of
eau de Marlboro Light.
The Diag (Best place for People
Watching) Freaks don't only come out at
night, and neither do the God-fearing
psychos. Pick an activist, any activist and
you're likely to find them on the Diag.
Anywhere (Best Place to get a
Parking Ticket) Isn't parking in Ann
Arbor fun? Those spiteful little people
The Law Library won for best studying venue, and many dedicated students agree.
Arbor fun'? Those spiteful little people do
Is your brain full of HTML, Java, or C/C++? Is "Linux" your n
campus.HotDispatch.com can turn that knowledge into cash!
The Arb basically laid waste to this department of the voting, winning three categories.
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