10B - The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. Magazine - Thursday, March 9, 2000

*g y .0
The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. Mag


Rowan
by Joelle Renstrom
They named her after a tree.
A bowed ash with leaves
like sideways moons, cut
in zigzags and lightning bolts
by the teeth of caterpillars.
They buried the placenta in the garden.
That summer, stalks and vegetables
they had never planted grew there.
Tomatoes round like a mother's
belly, impatiens spotting dawn
and saffron across the back of the yard.
Snapdragons draped like ruffles,
opening to the beaks of hummingbirds,
vibrating with the fluttering of wings.
She said that at night spiders came out
of the walls and danced with her,
spinning silver through her midnight,
planting stars in her room.
I once found her with six ladybugs.
She was counting their spots,
telling them she was almost three.
They crawled on her hands, orange
like the berries on a mountain ash,
hanging from her fingers.
The neighborhood stray snapped at her
hand through the fence. She bent down,
stuck her lips through the chain links
and whispered. The dog's ears stood
like needles seeking the thread of her voice.
Then it let her wrap a dandelion into its collar.
One night we found her in the walk-in
pantry, naked as a tree in winter
with her hands in a box of Fruit Loops.
The dog sitting beside her, graciously
accepting handfuls of cereal, as if
opening its mouth to the sky.

BASTARD
Continued from Page 4B
board relinquished several keys to the
wall. The space bar, for instance.
Now, I can't hit a button to make an
empty space, because instead there's
an empty space where the button
should be." Not only that, this made
perfect sense at the time.
"Are you jealous of me?" he said.
Yes, I told him I am jealous of his
dark eyes and the way thin lovely ner-
vous brunettes look at him and his
cigar-cutters and his way of putting
shadows on landscapes when he
walks by. Entire landscapes turn gray
and black and full of some sacred
meaning, and he walks by carelessly
and a solemn beauty in a black skirt
named Jacky tugs at his elbow with
love. How can I be like you, I said.
Help me.
"You've got to be a paradox," he
said. "You have to smoke and drink
bourbon, but still keep inmshape." He
showed me his forearms. "Those
forearms are pretty big," he said, and
I nodded. "You've got to have big
forearms. Plus you have to be confus-
ing, and wear a nice watch." I said I
was confused. "You have to mystify
people," he said. "Smile only when
you're sad, laugh when you're
depressed, stare at nothing and con-
centrate on it." I catch his drift. What
about pleasures and such, I said.
"Carnal pleasures are necessary. Find
someone to discover your peaks with
the help of casual drug use," heksaid.
I closed my eyes and saw Jacky and
me. We were sitting on the grass. I
said hi and kissed her. I touched her
and she drew away. You have to find
the spot, she said. I kissed her neck,
and she said no. I kissed her arm and
she said no. Upper half or lower half,
I asked. She thought and said lower. I
pulled off her skirt and slapped her
on the buttocks. She laughed and said
yes. We made love on the grass, never
touching each other. I sucked on her
teeth and eyelashes and she laughed
and pressed her body against mine,
until I felt her passing herself into
me. Otto is stupid, I thought.
Do you think I can do it, I say.
"You'll be okay," he says. "You're a
lunatic."
Thanks, I say. And then I stabbed
him with the butter knife. He gasped
and looked at me. It didn't go in very
far, since, after all, it's only a butter
knife, not designed to penetrate ribs
and viscera etcetera.
So many months ago, at some
obscure party, I was improvising a lit-
tle dance routine with the torchier in
the corner and Jacky came up to
waltz with me. We were swaying back
and forth, and she told me her name.
I said I should lead, but she laughed
and told me she just bought new
shoes.
There are no torchiers here, or new
shoes, just white nurses, white floors,
white walls. I've only been here a
week but I'm starting to like it.
Maybe Jacky will visit me soon, or
Otto when he gets out of the hospital.
I'm learning new words every day so
I can say everything I want. Otto can
say everything he wants in a way that
everyone likes. Today's words are
apotheosis redolent triage oeuvre and
soporific.

Sunrise
by Chrirs Fc
All this time, he's been walking down the road
Pausing to think of how tired he is, how ready he is
All the things he's seen, all the people he's known
They all play a part, all play a role
But few have the key, have the chance
He looks down the road, and he sees her light
It shined for no one, yet he sees it, like it belongs to him
He's running now, a desperate chase that never ends
Beckoning towards him as it seems to move away
Don't you know how it tears his heart? Kills him softly?
But it gives him reason to live, for the chance he will
catch her
Little by little, the distance grows and he loses sight
He forgets why he runs, other things distract him
Into the night, he wants to give up, and he fades away
He is still, completely disconnected from the world
Floating away, nothing can be hidden
The truth. The struggre. The fears of so many people
The poor man searching for food. The fragile girl searching
for sense
He wants to help them. He has to help them
But he's still too far away, caught up in the wind
Crashing back to earth, cold and hard, to face his own
fears
Back on the road, he begins to walk again
The journey has just begun, like the sunrise
There is no hurry, the end is there, and he's not going
away.


Live with a host family in Ecuador...
Study in an Italian villa... Attend
West End theatre performances in
London... Learn to speak Zulu in
South Africa...
Been there,
done that- yet?
Stop by the UM Office of
International Programs to find
out about summer, semester and
academic year programs in
Europe, Africa, Latin America,
Asia and Australia. Choosing a
UM program means that you will
earn in-residence credit, and be
able to use UM Financial Aid to
help cover program costs. If you
haven't been there yet, it's time
to go with OIP!

K

r *I
oL.
L -

The University of Michigan
Office of International
Programs
G-513 Michigan Union
www.umich.edu/-iinet/oip
PH: (734) 764-4311

J

J