The Michigan Daily - Thursday, October 15, 1998 - 11A
'Parasite' proves that
combustion can be fun
By Eugene Bowen
morrow night, four African-
American comics will bring to the
Fox Theater all the bluntness, raunch
and never-ending humor that one
could possibly dream for. Bruce
Bruce, AJ Johnson, TK Kirkland and
headliner Michael Colyar will no
doubt raise the roof of the Fox
Theater as their decades of comedic
experience come to a head.
TK Kirkland, who will be the last
opener for Colyar, promised in a
recent interview that "Mike (Colyar)
will have trouble coming onstage
"I'm don't think of myself as
dirty," Kirkland said. "I just talk a lot
"My show is based on life. I'm a
recorder of the streets. You will have
to have lived to know what I'm talk-
* The Jersey City native has been
performing since his days as a grad-
uate student at the University of
"Back then I wasn't really funny,
because at that time I wasn't taking
"Parasite Eve" is a game that harkens back to the
days of beginning biology class when we were
forced to learn the basic parts of a cell. The list
seemed endless: the cell wall, the nucleus, the ribo-
somes, the mitochondria, etc. "Parasite Eve" treats
the mitochondria differ-
Now, the mitochondria
is a microorganism that
lives within human cells.
It has existed symbiotical-
ly within the nucleus for
millions of years.
That seems to be-where .
the factual part of the
game's story ends becauseQ
after years of research, the
mitochondria can be traced
to a single source: a female
human in Africa known as "Mitochondria
Eve." But Eve has larger ambitions, such as to
one day take over the human race. The setting is
Christmas Eve (what a pun!), New York City.
The player jumps into the role of Aya Brea, a
detective on the NYPD's 17th precinct. His or her
role is to thwart Eve's attempt at world conquest.
The player has help along the way from partner
Daniel "Bo" Dollis, and Dr. Kunihiko Maeda, a sci-
entist who has devoted his studies to the mitochon-
What is scary and sad about this game is that
there so many similarities to two previous games
that came out within the past year, "Resident Evil 2"
from Capcom Entertainment and "Final Fantasy
VII" from "Parasite Eve"'s creator Squaresoft. The
gameplay is similar to "Resident Evil 2" with the
third-person format (you control Aya Brea). How
the game progresses is dependent upon whom she
speaks to and what she finds. But there is too much
in the way of random combat battles that bears a
striking similarity to "Final Fantasy VII."
There are many icons in the menu window to
learn in order to master the game, including a
weapon icon, armor icon, items, para-
site energy and tune-ups. These can be
The player has so many options
to choose from, and making
out what's on the screen
TIM IA isn't simple.
"Parasite Eve" has very
good gameplay, but it
doesn't have a quality plot.
Anyone who knows any-
thing about basic cell biol-
ogy knows that the premise
of the game is completely
unfounded. The story drags
on to the point of boredom as
the game winds down to the
final battle with "Eve."
"Eve had a lot of potential but never quite lived
up to it. The movie files are well done, and it's so
enjoyable, in a perverse way, to watch people spon-
taneously combust. But movie files do not make a
By the end, you'll find yourself wanting your
own mitochondria to come alive, so you'll sponta-
neously combust. Whew, what a scary thought!
Or you could just play a different game.
- Gabe Smith
Courtesy of Artistry Management
TK Kirkland performs comedy at the Fox Theater in Detroit tomorrow.
Tomorrow at 8 p.m.
my act serious-
two weeks after
I received my
master's I began
to devote myself
notes that his
schedule is gru-
eling, but he
notes that it is
beyond the common." But Kirkland
has no qualms about "playing" mar-
ried; he has two sons. And he does
admit that he and his girlfriend of two
years have begun discussing the pos-
sibility of tying the knot.
"But I'm really careful about that,"
he said. "'Cause marriage is real."
Kirkland has performed many
times with the other slated comics.
"We get along well, and we compli-
ment each other," he said. "Our
styles are similar enough that our
show turns into a smoothly run
blend. But our acts are diverse
enough so that you're not listening to
the same thing over and over again."
With a boyish-looking innocence,
AJ Johnson is a natural comedic tal-
ent. While appearing in a variety of
television series and films ("BAPS,"
"Panther" and "How to be a Player,"
to name a few), he is perhaps best
known for portraying Sleazy E in Dr.
Dre's "Dr. Dre" video.
Still, AJ is no stand-up newbie,
amassing much praise for his "HBO
Def Comedy Jam" and "BET'S
Comic View" performances.
The "large and in charge" Bruce
Bruce has been making a great name
for himself ever since he first
stepped out onto stage in 1991. He
has gained quite a bit of notoriety
due primarily to his appearances in
"BET's Comic View". He even per-
formed at the University in 1996,
where he won audience approval
Colyar has always been known as a
conscientious comic. He has had a
knack for make things most humor-
ous also enlightening.
Colyar began to gain that type of
"I care" persona when, after winning
the $100,000 "Star Search" grand
prize comedian championship, he
donated half to Los Angeles home-
Colyar has appeared in dozens of
televised, comedic venues, from
"Def Comedy Jam" to "Showtime at
the Apollo" to "Comic Relief V"
As a result, these four men seen
destined to many to prove their
humor to be beyond measure, and the
lessons they will teach along the way
touch, if for but a short while.
The Bacardi by Night Comedy
Tour is tomorrow night beginning at
8 p.m. Tickets are $25 and $32.50,
and are available through
Ticketmaster. Call 763-TKTS for
Women of Michigan
You are invited to:
DISCOVER ALPHA GAMMA DEL TA
"I like money;
so I do whatever it takes," he said. "I
don't mince words about it. The soci-
ety we live in is motivated by money.
And there's nothing wrong with try-
ing to get yours."
Thirty-seven year-old Kirkland has
never married, noting that "marriage
is for the common man, and I'm
Saturday, October 17
1322 Hill St.
Call Karyn 995-4386
WE'RE AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY EMPLOYER WITH
UNEQUALED OPPORTUNITIES FOR EMPLOYMENT.