16B - The Mi can Daily'Best of 'Ann Arbot 17 -Thurday April 17, 1 7 0 0 v w Tho ~Michsgarh Daily Best of 'Ann Arbr ' -.Ib- Best of Dating Cheesy, dull pick-up and rejection lines round-out campus datig the pinnacle of verbal entendre? How about "Here's a quarter, call your room- mate, you're not coming home tonight" or "Nice shirt. It would look great wedged in my headboard." No sir, life's just an open-air party. Forget guile,, seduction, skill and style - why don't we just do it in the road? Why indeed. Best rejection line: "Maybe later." Best place to meet a date: Class I'm not sure how I feel about this one. Sure, it's easier. Who hasn't pulled the "Hey, I'm having a study group at my house why don't you come, by the way, do you have a boyfriend?" routine? A shared class creates a common bond and generates conversational topics, but if you happen to be in the "Ugly Undergraduate Support Group" discussion section, it could be a long cold semester. A creative person, however, should be able to make this one into a winner. Best pick-up line: "Nice shoes - let's fuck." So this is it, huh folks?-This is the best we could do? Each of us with sev- eral years of college experience in seducing the opposite sex, and this is dren ("Oh, he's not mine. I adopted him. His real mommy didn't want him any more,") are a little cliched. If she knows you're trying to charm your way into her drawers with sugar and spice, it's not going to work. The Arb is almost as bad a picnic in the park or singing under her window. It's been done to death. Best unusual date: Nichols Arboretum Is there an echo in here? If you're dating someone stupid enough to be charmed by your hemp jewelry and gui- tar playing by the Huron River, she's not going to be worth the effort. And why the hell is this an unusual date? "Look honey, a tree! Isn't this romantic? We're sitting in dirt with several hun- dred other Frisbee chucking cheeba monkeys!" r It should come as a surprise to no one that the response to ill come-on lines is a trite and unimaginative as this. If con- fronted with "Nice shoes - let's fuck," a witty riposte isn't exactly called for. "Welcome to Dumpsville, population: You." "It's not you, it's me. I don't like r you." Now those are blow- off lines. But I suppose that if you have a half-crocked meathead pushing back his baseball hat to leer at you W while he spills watered-down Meister Chau on your tight black pants and clogs, it doesn't take much to douse his fires. Best place for a first date: Nichols Arboretum Common rookie mistake. The key to making a sensitive guy date work is to have a trace of subtlty. The symphony, an art museum, anything involving chil- UNIVERSITY Continued from Page 12B ing mazes of stacks and private study carrels perfect for delving into research on topics from Athena to Zeus; plus, plenty of cozy cubbies for knockin' boots. Best Place to Work Out: Central Campus Recreation. Building (CCRB) With stairmasters, a swimming pool and sultry sweat, it's where all those students with six-pack abs go to make the rest of us pasty slouches look silly. Best Campus Tradition: The Naked Mile The last day of classes is the designated time when Wolverines drop their pants and run like hell across our fair campus. A day of unbridled joy for graduat- ing seniors, except for those of us who have the mis- fortune of seeing our chem lab partners in the raw. Best Cause/issue/Movement: Gay rights College Republicans may try and deface their Diag chalkings, but you can't keep a strong cause down for long. Best Activist Group: The Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Center (SAPA From "Taking Back the Night" to counseling victims of rape and sexual assault, SAPAC's valu- able and bold contributions to the University earn them the moniker of Best Activists. Best Protest Slogan: No clear-cut winner here, but an hon- orable mention goes to the entry, "Burn Z Fleming Burn." Best Speaker/Lecturer 4 in Past Year:®1 Dave Zaber Yeah. That was cool. Unfortunately, we don't really know who this is or what Mr. Zaber spoke about. Best Bollinger Look-a-Like: Slews of varied entries provide no clear winner, but Robert Redford gets our nod. Intelligent, dynamic and commited to student issues, Bollinger is also one fine looking sport. Best Computing Center: The Fishbowl in Angell Hall The Texas of Campus Computing Sites' large warehouse atmosphere opens the possibility for turning Fishbowl site into an after-hours rave. Best Student Group/Organization: The Michigan Student Assembly (MSA) II' Op Did the big group stuffs ballots fn maybe not, but we do know tl people vote for "Best of Ann Ar vote in MSA elections (ha ha). 81 + Best MSA Member: Probir Mehta Only in Ann Arbor would we vote our favorite MSA member right out of office. Olga Savic, who now has his job, was a close second here. Best Bathroom: The Michigan Union Lacking the quiet ambience of Rackham, or the cozy privacy of the Graduate library, or the gentle lights of the Chem Building, the Union E ? Maybe, his, more bor" than bathi and recer Bes FIG Bc in aI Bes Alp Wi also I Ugi The we r we ca Bes Roc Bui Th lectu the b Best date movie: "Jerry Maguire" OK, not bad. "Jerry Maguire" is I CI A 5 wWhat? Did we hear those nitpi are authentic? Yep, we did. N hearth baked, and oven-fresh hot, we're hot. Try us. Love u ..I This coupon entitles yo with the purchase of three bag Offer expires 4-24-97 ft 0 ,; { i.:. Vii. 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