NATION/W ORLD The Michigan Daily - Wednesday, September 4, 1996 - 9 Adoption reflects family changes] More adopted children learning identities of birth parents : Los Angeles Times WASHINGTON - Becca Price and her husband, Christopher Clayton, decided that they wanted to see a movie. As parents typically do when planning a Saturday night out, they arranged for a baby sitter. But Thea Grimes-Tenney, the woman who sat with David, 5, and Tori, 4, was anything but typical. She is the chil- dren's biological mother. The Claytons and Grimes-Tenney, who live near each other in the Ann Arbor area, have added an unusual twist to the idea of the "extended family." Theirs includes the Claytons and their two children through adoption - and the woman who gave birth to them. "Thea is their birth mother, and I am their mommy" Price said. Adoption policies have undergone a stunning transformation from the not- so-distant past, when records were sealed and children's biological roots were shrouded in secrecy. In increasing numbers, those adopted today not only know the identity of their birth parents but, with their adoptive par- ents' blessing, often maintain a relation- ship with them. The majority of domes- tic adoptions, experts in the field say, now feature some degree of openness. The extent of the openness varies .greatly. At the low end, the birth and adoptive parents merely know each oth- ers' first names and exchange informa- tion through a third party. At the high end, it is the sort of arrangement maintained by the Claytons and Grimes-Tenney, the "fam- ily Thanksgiving dinner" model, as one adoption agency director calls it. In this category, she said, "the West Coast is probably five to 10 years ahead of the East Coast." The term "openness" is, "unfortu- nately, a scare word that sounds like some crazy thing ... like 'open mar- riage;" said Bruce Rappaport, execu- tive director of the Independent Adoption Center, an agency based in Pleasant Hill, Calif. "For years, we tried to call it 'nor- malized' adoption because it means approaching adoption the same way you do the regular part of your life," he said. "Open adoption makes adoption normal. As in the rest of our society, secrecy and shame are avoided unless absolutely necessary." The trend "is not so far apart from the communal living" embraced by many cultures and "fits what other societies do, where there is no nuclear family," said Yale University child-development specialist Edward Zigler. Before secrecy laws dating to the 1940s, "most adoptions were done within people's own families or with someone close by in the church or com- m u n i t y," Rappaport said. "Everyone did At firs know everyone else, and they little frea were, in fact, open adoptions, te idea t although they weren't called adoption, that." The new wave was base of openness , began after adults Ignorance who had been adopted as chil- dren initiated searches and legal battles, seeking to find the missing pieces of their lives. Experts now recognize that adopted children often are vulnerable to emotional and psychological damage if they grow up denied this information. "Adoptees came out of the closet,just like many other groups in society - gays, single parents - that didn't fit into the '50s, and said they weren't going to suffer in silence anymore,' an agency director said. Also, the growing incidence of spe- cial-needs adoptions, typically involving the placement of older children "who know where they come from," showed that "the sky didn't fall in," said Ann Sullivan, adoption program director for the Child Welfare League of America. Experts recommend extensive coun- seling in advance so the limits of the arrangements are defined. No matter how well the ground is prepared, howev- er, there can be tremors along the way. "It's like getting a set of in-laws," Sullivan said. "Some of us love our in- laws, and others grit their teeth and communicate only at Christmas." The Claytons and Grimes-Tenney acknowledge that their arrangement rep- resents the most extreme degree of open- ness. Others are more comfortable when there is more distance between the adop- tive parents and the birth parents. "Being geographically thousands of miles away works for us, but I think the dynamics would be the same if we were closer," said Chris Keene, an actor from I I Wa; ked b' of ope Sbut d on ---Chris I Santa Monica, Calif. He and his is a wife, Susan, a city planner, bring their 20- month-old son, 1n James, to Dekalb, Ill., occasionally hat to see his birth mother. "At first I was a little freaked by the idea of open adoption, but that Keene was based on Actor ignorance," Keene said. "It works for us." that, despite anxiety on the part of' adults, children for the most part seem to do just fine. "The kids are real clear who the parenf is," she said. "It's who gets up with theni at night, who makes sure the teeth are brushed and gets them off to school." To be sure, not all such arrangements have been trouble-free. One family, for example, agreed i1 advance to weekly visits from the birth mother. Then, without notice, the moth? er and father moved the family to anoth- er state and failed to disclose the loca- tion or even their phone number. The birth mother has not seen the child, of even photographs, for more than ayeir. Much rarer, experts say, is the night- mare that spooks many potential adop- tive parents: the prospect that the birth parents will change their mind and wait the children back. "In talking to birth mothers, I find{ they truly believe they made a wel' thought-out decision that they could not parent, and the last thing they would want to do is cause a disruption'," Sullivan said. Brenda Romanchik, a birth mother who relinquished her son, Matthew; after he was born 12 years ago, main: tains a relationship with him even though he lives in another city. '. "People always think that once you're on your feet, you're going to want this child back,' said Romanchik, who edit§ a national newsletter for birth parents "I can speak for a vast majority of birth mothers. The reason most chodse adoption is not because they think it will be the best thing for them but becauseit will be the best thing for the child. With that in mind, to go back five yegXs later and try to get the child back is ridiculous. They are not going to do that." But even ongoing involvement can be viewed as threatening unless the roles of all parties are clearly defined. Adoptive parents "have exactly the same kinds of ties as biological par; ents," Zigler said. "In fact, the psycho-' logical ties are even stronger." Some parents worry that their adopt- ed children, during turbulent adolescent years, might flee to their birth parents. AP PHOTO Workmen put up metal shutters at the Adam and Eve boutique at the Harbor Bay shopping center in Nassau, Bahamas, as Hurricane Fran approached the island chain yesterday. The hurricane picked up strength yesterday and headed toward *he southeastern United States. Sger Fran spins toward coast Although experts agree that secrecy is bad for the children, no one can know yet whether open adoption will stand the test of time. "The history is too short to know completely how well all of these arrangements are going to work," Sullivan said. "It's complicated, and it's too new," Zigler said. "We didn't know for 50 years the great harm that closed adop- tion was doing. There is no research, and that's what we need. It solves the 'Who am I?' problem, but does it intro-. duce a new cost of ambiguity? 'Where do my affections lie?' "With exactly the right people, the right child and the right circumstances, this might work. But I tend to be cau- tious about these kinds of social changes, because we don't have a research base." Nevertheless, Sullivan is convinced * With 115 mph winds, hurricane could cause extensive damage MIAMI (AP) - Hurricane Fran roared at 115 mph last night and its winds were expected to get even stronger as it aimed to make landfall along the southeastern U.S. coast tomorrow, 9 A hurricane watch, meaning the storm could hit within 36 hours, could go up for Georgia and South Carolina by this morning, meteorologist Robert Molleda said last night at the National Hurricane Center. Much of the Bahamas, a mecca for American gamblers and other vacation- ers, was bracing for a possible hit even though it appeared that Fran would pass north of the islands. * Heading west-northwest at 13 mph, Fran was expected to take a gradual turn to the northwest by early today, Molleda said. "That would take it into either Georgia or South Carolina sometime Thursday night," he said. Fran's winds jumped quickly from 85 mph early yesterday to 115 mph, mak- ing it a Category 3 hurricane on the Saffir-Simpson scale, capable of caus- ing extensive damage. The U.S. Navy sent ships to sea for safety, and disaster officials in some parts of the Southeast fretted that peo- ple may not take the threat seriously. "Our concern is that the public may become less responsive to evacuation orders," said Joe Farmer, a spokesper- son for South Carolina's Emergency Preparedness Division. "We recognize that as the public is exposed to more and more of these, the need for us to reinforce this message is greater." Hurricane Bertha, which killed nine, came ashore in North Carolina in July with sustained winds of just 75 mph, causing millions of dollars in damage. At 8 p.m. EDT last night, Fran was centered about 275 miles east of Nassau, Bahamas, and 700 miles south- east of Charleston, S.C. A hurricane warning was in effect for the northwest Bahamas, including the casino havens in Nassau and Freeport. Whitecaps in the water off San Salvador island in the Bahamas forced Club Med to declare its beach off lim- its. Residents throughout the country were told to stay indoors. San Salvador administrator Charles King said winds were near tropical storm force yesterday afternoon. "Apart from that, things are pretty much the same," he said. "We feel as though it will be a minimal hurricane, but we are watching and listening to the reports. We are ready to take the neces- sary precautions." The Navy wasn't waiting. In Jacksonville, Fla., 14 ships from Mayport Naval Station headed for the open sea. In North Carolina, business owners already suffering the effects of Hurricane Bertha were bemoaning more tropical weather. "It was the worst Labor Day I've ever had, and I've been in business 41 years," said Carol Dillon, owner of the Outer Banks Motel on North Carolina's Hatteras Island. tl 'Demand for primary care doctors rising this isn't shocking. General practitioners on par with specialists due to managed care CHICAGO (AP) - Because of the growth of managed care, the demand for general practitioners is catching up to the demand for specialists. Researchers studied recruitment adver- tisements in medical journals and found that in 1990 there were four ads for specialists - such as anesthesiolo- .mists and orthopedic surgeons - for every generalist position advertised. By 1995, the ratio dropped to 1.8 to 1. The researchers, led by Dr. Serena Seifer, a professor at the Center for Medical Education Research at the University of Washington in Seattle, aibuitedlthe shf t to he nrad of man- too few are going into primary care, such as family practice, internal medi- cine and pediatrics. Dr. Jerry Goldstein, president of the Council of Medical Specialty Societies, said the study would be useful to med- ical students considering career choices. Specialists' income dropped as much as 5 percent from 1993 to 1994, accord- ing to a new study in the journal Health Affairs. Still, most specialists make more than general practitioners, and the gap is as much as $100,000. Primary-care physicians made an average of $129,353, compared with $243,828 for some surgeons, the study found. In another study in the same journal, nearly half of the medical students, res- idents, clinical faculty and administra- tors suirveyed said gneralists re not this is. 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