10 - The Michigan Daily - Tuesday. October 8, 1996
M
You waited in line an hour to see this movie. Incredible opening! Heart--
stopping action! Unbelievable tension! This is going to be ... a great ... a great ...
oh no. Seated directly behind you. A talker. You can withstand many things.
People who drive 55 in the left lane. People with 10 items in the 8-items-only
checkout. But here you draw the line. Talking in movie theaters is
You paid seven bucks for this ticket. Seven bucks!
To the voice you say, "Could you please keep it down?"
PListake. The voice gets louder. "Let's move," you hiss to your girl-
friend. "No," she says. "Come on," you implore. "No," she says. "I've had it
with talkers," she says. She reaches into her bag. Drops a squat metallic
object on her lap. What the...? Out of th corn r of your y ,
you see her squinting, slowly, surely screwing two pieces together.
A... a... silencer? Geez! This is a side of her you've never seen before.
You think, momentarily, that should this case go to a jury, it will
be important to have movie lovers on the panel. She lifts the weapon
from her lap. What's it going to be? A Colt .45? A
derringer?
You forc
yours
if to look.
It's sleek. It's
smooth. It's small. It's a ... PDA? She's going to
threaten the voice with a personal digital assistant? She quickly
touches some keys, leans forward. "Computer," she says tersely to
the little machine. Great. Now your girlfriend talks to inanimate
objects. What's next?
Lunch with ali ns?
She whispers something else to the machine. Wonderful. She's
decided to catch up on work during your date. Suddenly, miracu-
lously, the voice behind you stops. Weird-like, in mid-sentence.
You glance back. What the ...? It's long. Round. Pointy. A... cone...
of... silence? "PDA with a silencer," your girlfriend mutters.
Damn, that's
good
software.
Open House, Tues. Oct. 8th, Noon-1:00, EECS 1200
Company Presentation, Tues. Oct. 8th, 7:00 pm EEC
;S~ 1500.~
I