t3 brc £oibtgrn tg Michael Rosenberg Roses Are Read j orr -we dill Ygot Mo jbs oryou For all those students currently looking for a job, I have some words of advice. Please don't. It's not that you won't get a job. (You won't, but that's your problem.) It's not that I'm worried that you may get a job offer instead of me. (I have already given up trying to find a job, ing determined that if every unemployed person on the planet except for me internally combusted and mass fires burned throughout the western hemisphere and I alone owned the world's one remaining fire extinguisher, people would choose to burn to a vicious death rather than hand me so much as a $5 bill to bail them out. Not that I am bitter.) No, the main reason I would like you to stop applying for jobs is so that I can 1 friends and family how "tough the job market is -just look at the rest of my graduating class." Inevitably, some of you will ignore my pleas and go ahead with the application process, which seems like it will never end. But relax, young job applicants, for the process will indeed end! You will know the end is near when you see those two kind words W iling at you in all their glory: ear Applicant." This is how rejection letters begin. You may wonder why they don't bother to put your name in there. The reason is obvious, you nitwit: these people have already rejected you. They have deemed you unworthy of using their stationery. They don't care what you think of them. For this same reason, rejection letters are among the most poorly itten documents in the world, right up there with economics textbooks. Most of them look something like this: Dear Applicant. Thank you for being of interest in being employed at our company of beings! Unfortunately, you have not been among those whom we could lect as our selections. We received s year a large number of applica- tions, approximately 84 times more than last year we received, which increased the difficulty of choosing our choice. Again, Thanks and Good Luck in future endeavouring! Sincerely, Jane Meathead Director of Rejection The Above You Corporation *Your first rejection letter can be difficult to handle. You begin to wallow in self-pity, making things out to be much worse than they are. After my first rejection letter, I was obviously devastated, thinking "I'll never get a job, I'll never get a job." And look at me today: Sure, I never did get a job, but my obvious devastation has developed into a quiet Sthing. After you receive a few rejection letters, you may have to "broaden the scope of your search," as the experts say. (Translation: Apply for some- thing to fit your pathetic little qualifications.) Here's how you do this: Think of all the jobs you might actually enjoy. Put them together in a list. Then burn the list - nobody gets a job they might actually enjoy until ey're at least 52 years old, and then >y if they know somebody. Another good tactic for broadening your scope is to write down all the cities you have ever hear of, then cross out all but Cleveland and Cheboygan. Apply for jobs in those two cities only. ' Of course, if you still can't get a job, don't fret - you probably didn't want to live in Cleveland or eboygan anyway. And besides, rejection letters can serve a positive purpose. For example: wallpaper. You can plaster rejection letters all over your walls, which will look wonderful in hues of off-white and gray. Rejection letters also serve another, JENNIFER BRADLEY-SWIFT/ Daily MUSKET cast and crew members celebrate their 40th anniversary. The group has produced 62 musicals over its tenure, including this weekend's "Guys and Dolls." ' Ki iii Utop* The University's student-run theater troupe celebrates 40 years of making musicals By Karen Sommer anniversary of MUSKET, the University-sponsored, student-run theater troupe, and its 62nd pro- duction since its conception in 1956. MUSKET or the little-known name that became an acronym-Michigan Union Show, Ko-Eds Too - sprouted its roots 88 years ago in the troupe called the Michigan Union Opera Company. In 1908, until the time ofMUSKET's debut, the University relegated female students to the Michigan League while University men called the Union home. With the separate but equal code en vogue, the Michigan Union Opera Com- pany rehearsed in the Union and there- fore could not or would not admit women. The all-male troupe concen- trated their efforts on satires about the college life of men, for men and by men. As society became more accepting of public women, so did the Michigan Union Opera Company. In 1956, the group changed the name to include "Ko- Eds" and invited women to their audi- tions for their first production, "Brigadoon." Since then, MUSKET has upheld its tradition ofperforming musi- cals full of spectacle, song and dance. The company's favorite shows to per- form have been "Hair," "Anything Goes," "Guys and Dolls" and "West Side Story." All, but "West Side Story," have been brought up on the boards three times; "West Side Story" graced the stage for a fourth run in '83. Some may say it isappropriatethen forMUS- KET to be doing "Guys and Dolls" to celebrate its anniversary; the audience must be calling for it again and again. While the University Activities Cen- ter supports MUSKET financially, the theater company relies most heavily on student participation. The casts and technical crews change for every pro- duction, but MUSKET's mantra re- mains the same. "MUSKET provides the opportunity to do hands-on learn- ing," said Sascha Connor, "Guys and Dolls" producer. "It's learning about community, compromise, improvisa- tion, team-work and fun. (The chal- lenge) of every production is taking people who have never met and draw- ing the group together." Ironically, Joshua Rosenblum, the producer for the 1982-83 years, speaks of MUSKET similarly. "The longerl'm in commercial theater, I long for MUS- KET days. Everyone who worked on MUSKET wasn't in it for the money or the fame. We were in it for the commu- nity and fun." Rosenblum left MUS- KET on his graduation day to join the Daily Arts Writer it "Itvs learning about community, compromise, improvisation, team-work and fun" -Sascha Connor, MUSKET producer many MUSKET alums who success- fully tackle the Great White Way. He produces Broadway shows, such as "Guys and Dolls," for the company Dodger Productions. Other successful MUSKET alums in- clude Rosenblum's partner in Dodger Productions and his director forthe MUS- KET productions of "Hair" and "Run- aways," Michael Goldberg. Hollywood knows Goldberg for writing the movies "Cool Runnings" and "Little Giants." Rosenblum and Goldberg knew their talent and ability to work together would pay off in '82 when they took the MUS- KET production of "Hair" on the road to a theater festival in Skokie, Ill. Michael Butler, the original producer of "Hair" on Broadway, saw the pro- duction by Rosenblum and Goldberg and attempted to organize a national tour of the MUSKET cast. Unfortu- nately the tour never materialized, but MUSKET casts of "West Side Story" and "Anything Goes" have toured suc- cessfully in previous years. It is not uncommon that MUSKET members stick together, especially when they venture off to New York City. The musical revue, "Save Me a Song," writ- ten by David Kirshenbaum (director of the'91 production of"Chess") and pro- duced by Bret Havey (director of the '93 production of "42nd Street"), can be seen at Don't Tell Mama every Mon- day night. The revue's musical direc- tor, C. Lynne Shankel, the choreogra- pher, Elizabeth Rossi, and performer Kate Guyton, are all MUSKET alums. When they are out on their own, Kirshenbaum writes lyrics for his own musicals, and Havey produces com- mercials for VH1. MUSKET has spawned a large num- ber of Broadway sensations. Madeline Rubinstein, once a MUSKET musical director, is now a Broadway pianist. Greg Jbara, a performer from the other UAC musical theater company SophShow, has been seen in Broadway productions of "The Secret Garden,' "Damn Yankees," and currently stars it the production of"Victor/Victoria" witl Julie Andrews. Tammy Jacobs (Reno Sweeney in the'93 "Anything Goes" an( directorofthe'94"Hair") joinsthe Broad- way cast of "Les Miserables" in charm- ing audiences nightly. Members of MUSKET, past and present, believe the training helps to lay the foundation for a successful career ii- the entertainment industry. There is r consensus that the experience gives the students a sense ofaccomplishmentanc. belief in their abilities that exists be cause the production has little inpu from faculty. "(It's wonderful that) you are creat- ing something with your peers, and thc product is strictly from students. The great mix of students from the Univer- sity allow for different levels of profes- sionalism and with every new shoe there is a lot of trust involved," ex- plained Jonathan Berry (performer it the '93 "Anything Goes" and the '94 "42nd Street" and assistant director o the '94 "Hair"). "There are fears and doubts, but it always comes together and you always learn." 'Guys and Dolls' breaks into the '90s By Karen Sommer Daily Arts Writer A woman feigns pregnancy to her mother in order to trap her man. A drunk goes to an alternative church to seek redemption. A gambler just can't kick the habit. Showgirls prove they have aspirations for greatness too. Sounds like the perfect '90s 12-step melodrama, yet the author, Damon Runyon, wrote the original stories for the comedy "Guys and Dolls" almost half a century ago. Did Runyon and "Guys and Dolls" composer-lyricist Frank Loesser intend to produce social commentary or just a nonstop explosipn of dance and song representing all that's great and awful about New York City? Adam Hess, director of MUSKET's production of this romantic comedy, thinks they meant GUYS AND DOLLS Where: Power Center When: Friday and Saturday at 8 p.m., Sunday at 2 p.m. Tickets: $9 ($6 students). Call 764-0450. KET uses the new setting "to give a stronger sense of background to the audience." Said Hess, "I disagree with updating for the sake of updating, but we have justified the few changes we made." - Because the show now takes place after the men come home from war, the inclusion of stronger women's roles seemed like a given to Hess. "The open- ing scene is a montage of the time and and found a group of female gangster from Chicago called the Michigan Ba- bies. They would send their sexies member to seduce a male and then ro him. We figured Big Julie was one o. them sent to New York." Of the other altered roles, Arvide, th formerly known bass drum playing grandfather figure to Sarah Brown wa changed to Aunt Arvide (Heathe- Albrecht). "The role wasn't gender- specific and we thought the audience would get a better feel for Sarah (th love-struck missionary, played b Allison Lane) if she had a female ido and inspiration," Hess explained. The final change took place in Lieu tenant Brannigan (Kimberl Woodman), a cop who lives to catch th. down-on-his-luck gambler, Nathaj Detroit (Randy Kurstin). "We knee . s .. .r...1...., - ; i >m: